Intimacy: Today, my parents decided I was old enough to know that my mother... - FML

By UGH - 31/08/2009 23:48 - United States

Spicy

Today, my parents decided I was old enough to know that my mother doesnt really have horrible nightmares. She's a screamer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 132

You deserved it 2 924

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Tubular Bells starts playing…

By so scared - 08/02/2014 17:13 - Canada - Barrie

Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon, after I'd explained to her how scared I was of The Exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 689

You deserved it 6 206

By Poordaughter5 - 06/07/2016 17:21 - Germany

Today, my parents watched a horror movie with some creepy child in it. Apparently, I sound just like that kid when I call for my mom, so now she doesn't want me to call her mom anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 205

You deserved it 791

Nightmare mother

By scared shirtless - 18/03/2021 20:01

Today, for the fifth time in a row, I woke up screaming from a nightmare. My mother burst into my room, leaned in real close and said, "So help me God, if you do not stop fucking screaming, I will rip your arms off and beat you with them." I’m never sleeping again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 226

By lm - 20/05/2009 20:49 - Ireland

Today, my dad told me about how my mother had a bad dream last night and began to scream "Don't take me, take my children!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 691

You deserved it 3 991

Let's get loud

By Anonymous - 14/11/2010 07:36 - Reserved

Spicy

Today, my parents asked me if I had a nice time with my girlfriend at the amusement park I took her to yesterday. She was pretty freaked out by some of the rides so without thinking I said, "Yeah, but she sure is a screamer." My parents then exchange a look and say, "Oh trust us, we know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 711

You deserved it 32 180

By glittercat - 26/01/2009 23:44 - United States

Spicy

Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 260

You deserved it 3 323

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

By Anonymous - 06/09/2019 20:03

Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 508

You deserved it 181

By Anonymous - 06/06/2013 18:47 - Isle of Man - Douglas

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 372

You deserved it 3 881

Gentle

By Ash_The_Unicorn - 20/08/2020 14:05

Today, after losing my father a little over 6 months ago, and finally feeling comfortable talking to my fiancé (who lives with me and my family) about it, my mother forced her way into the room and started yelling at me for crying. Her excuse, "It’s after your bedtime." I’m 20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 957

You deserved it 480

By slightlyworried - 05/04/2013 05:28 - United States - Parker

Today, I woke up from a nightmare that I've been having for a couple of weeks. In the nightmare I'm shot four times in the back by none other than my mother. I'm getting worried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 140

You deserved it 3 334

Next

Top comments

Dynoblaze 1

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:53

Maybe having sex with your dad was a nightmare for her.......

Khalavaster 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:46

one day you'll be one too :)

Comments

F00tball_Playa 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:41

I don't get it bitch

railfan_fml 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:44

and how old r you?

daniisme 0

Saturday 6 March 2010 3:07

you will inherit here genes... :P

CitizenSnipz 0

Friday 30 July 2010 16:28

I'm a screamer too. Also a talker. Moaner... And finally, a squirmer. I often wonder what the he'll I'm dreaming. How is this an FML? You learned that your mom doesn't have horrible nightmares. 

CitizenSnipz 0

Friday 30 July 2010 16:30

Oh god, I just realized it was about sex, not sleep. Awkward trolling may now begin. 

greekgal44 14

Friday 3 June 2011 2:44

hahaha XD ^^

Chaosaiyan 6

Wednesday 1 August 2012 0:49

This comment is gold

smellanie 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:45

that sucks

T_X_P 2

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:45

Too.Much.Information.

railfan_fml 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:45

oops i mean second sorry I'm using the iPhone app

ivydindy13 14

Wednesday 26 October 2011 4:36

You are still an idiot.

Khalavaster 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:46

one day you'll be one too :)

silly_kate 0

Wednesday 2 September 2009 9:57

lmao! nice!

Dynoblaze 1

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:53

Maybe having sex with your dad was a nightmare for her.......

FeelYaFallinAway 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:59

lol. Good point rofl

Ajasstuff 0

Sunday 27 June 2010 17:20

Good one!

shoshizzle 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 7:57

WTF...

NaziZombie 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 8:00

First (you liar)

stupidfacesiiigh 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 8:07

hahahahahahahaaa that SO sucks for you but thank you for making my day better ^___^

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable My ex Jealousy Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I called off my engagement because I fell in love with my best friend of 10 years since we recently reconnected. I confessed my feelings to her and asked her out. She rejected me and said she only sees me as a friend. Now I’m completely single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 4 080

It's great to see you ! How was july ? Hot, sweaty, flirty ? How I miseed talking to you (and getting one or two comments if we're lucky enough). But let's not complain, a whole month welcoming artists for their second rounds who gave us brand new il...

I agree, your life sucks 15

You deserved it 18

The Top

Today, I got the most tear-jerking comment so far about my severe stutter. While I was talking to my neighbor, his little brother interrupted and asked me if I was possessed by a demon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 433

You deserved it 2 592

Today, my sister snuck into the bathroom while I was in the shower (the lock is broken) and took my clothes and towels. I came out and quickly went to my room. As I went in, my sister was sitting on my bed with two friends watching TV. I instantly covered up, but they saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 703

You deserved it 324

Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend didn’t get me a present, or do anything special for me, because, “The rent’s paid, you have a fridge full of groceries… What more do you want?” Later on, he asked me why did I, “look so sad?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 378

You deserved it 290

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years, the father of my son, has been the pervert who has been harassing my mother with weird texts and pictures of his knob. The cops told me after we went to the police station to report it and catch the creep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 186

You deserved it 3 839

Today, while sitting with my son, an ice cream cone landed on my head from out of nowhere. I look up to see three children on the balcony above us yelling, "Look! We hit the fat lady!" They ran away laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 081

You deserved it 5 598

Today, while working at a chain restaurant, I forgot to charge someone a few dollars for extra toppings on the side. My stingy boss took the time to take that money out of my paycheck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 821

You deserved it 638