Go read the many many many horror stories of wedding. In weddings nothing seems fair and people get too big headed and jealous. Ur in the right. But know where u stand and know to find a new best friend. Go to the wedding have fun do the punch, otherwise u will probably look bad or she will cry and make a scene. But don't bother with her after it.

Sorry OP but your so called "best friend" seems like a douche. I know you're marriedto her brother, but that makes no right for her to treat you so coldly... I wouldn't serve the punch, tell her to do it herself or let people do it thsmelves, it's no right to make you work like that without letting you have fun with the family too. I'm surprised your husband doesn't say anything.

Why are you planning HER wedding with her mother? Shouldn't the bride to be plan her own wedding, possibly asking her mother for guidance? Since you feel slighted, perhaps you should politely bow out of the planning, unless you're being paid to do it.

I don't see how it's supposed to be like 'I gave you something, now I want to be repaid for it'. She's one of your best friends, but why does that mean she necessarily has to choose you between her friends? I'm sure she felt honored while being your maid of honor. You can feel honored that you're planning the wedding - that's not nothing at all - and being useful on the day itself.

then don't plan the wedding if it bothers you , if she doesn't involve you in the wedding party just means less work for you. hopefully it works out for you tho .

Yeah, punch-shoveling is essential, all right. The OP should be honored that she has been duly chosen to wield the great ladle, for the event would surely collapse into chaos without her aid! Sheesh.

I am not sure the OP is so much "I should be repaid" as she is "you want me to be the hired help at your wedding" It's one thing to not be asked to be in the wedding party but once the bride has you serving punch you're no longer even a wedding guest you are just an employee working the wedding. It's different if like my wedding it's the whole family pitching in. My exwife planned the reception, I created a music mix for it, my brother in law catered etc a real family affair. But if she is the only one being asked to work at the wedding then it's a major slap in the face as family if nothing else.

Not only is your grammar great, but your situation is very comparable to the OP's!