Intimacy: Today, I found out that because of my high blood pressure I can't...

By Anonymous - 02/04/2009 23:12 - United States

Today, I found out that because of my high blood pressure I can't have sex for one month. My wedding is next weekend and the following two weeks are my honey moon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 267 589

You deserved it 28 624

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/12/2013 21:06 - United States - Buffalo

Today, I found out that I am bleeding from my cervix and must refrain from having sex for the next two weeks. My fiancé pointedly asked if my cervix has anything to do with my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 084

You deserved it 11 026

By Anonymous - 28/01/2011 04:24 - United States

Today, I found out that I have to reschedule my upcoming honeymoon because my office will be understaffed that week, due to the boss going on vacation right after my wedding. Oh, yeah, and he's in my bridal party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 012

You deserved it 2 706

Scary

By Anonymous - 22/08/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, I realized how much I hate my girlfriend, when I got excited as the doctor told me I should refrain from having sex for the next two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 801

You deserved it 31 441

Brain melter

By Anonymous - 27/07/2023 03:00

Today, due to my blood pressure, I've begun getting an agonising migraine every time I get increased heart rate from arousal. We’re supposed to be trying for our first baby, but we’ve not had successful sex in weeks because I can’t last until orgasm before I feel like my head is splitting open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 163

By no luck - 30/09/2010 17:14 - United States

Today, I found out less than 3 weeks before my wedding my fiancé will lose his new, great paying job unless we cancel our nonrefundable honeymoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 139

You deserved it 3 604

Damper

By bleh - 23/11/2009 22:29 - United States

Today, my fiancé and I were fooling around when his foreskin ripped and bled all over the place. After a trip to the emergency room, the doctor told us no sex for six weeks to let it heal. We're getting married and going on our honeymoon in two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 487

You deserved it 6 829

Not feeling it

By Anonymous - 20/06/2021 02:01

Today, it’s been over 15 months since I’ve had sex with my fiancé. We’re getting married next month. Now I'm wondering if we’ll have sex at all on our honeymoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 398

You deserved it 363

Out of order

By HornyWife - 13/06/2020 02:02

Today, I'm on my honeymoon. My husband and I cannot consummate our marriage, because his penis has an open wound due to… vigorous masturbation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 454

You deserved it 361

Take a ticket

By ugh - 24/05/2015 19:53 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I realized that my relationship has hit a new low when I made an appointment with my girlfriend to have sex. I have a two week wait. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 131

You deserved it 5 125

Denied

By Anonymous - 23/04/2021 23:01

Today, my fiancé decided that we shouldn't have sex before we get married. Even though we've been doing it for years. We can't get married right now due to Covid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 172

You deserved it 188

Leviathan_fml 0

Friday 3 April 2009 10:03

ouch. have sex anyway.

KPACOTKA 0

Friday 3 April 2009 9:57

YOUR LIFE DOES SUCK.... BUT NOT FOR LONG

Comments

Radiohead_fml 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:13

Just explain to your doctor, he wil have a solution for it. No salt, meds whatever come on. But if you don't, i agree your life is f*cked.

formosababie 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:23

two words: lazy sex.

xillentz 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:44

man if you were a girl. and i were the guy. shit. id refund that honeymoon asap and rebook it LOL.

KawaiiRoxas 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 1:00

I'd move the wedding date XD. But that does suck, poor you.

angelslayer 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 1:23

if i was your fiance i would **** the doctor off and **** you harder... **** that shit you only get a hooney moon once.. dont ruin it

justinsbaby291 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 1:38

aw do it anyway! just be gentle haha, i bet ur doc can u give u medicine to control it. im telling u have oatmeal everyday it like crazy helps bringing ur blood pressure down