Miscellaneous: Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought...

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By lostforwords - 06/08/2011 19:10 - Ireland

Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 088

You deserved it 6 307

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By Anonymous - 30/12/2012 19:21 - Germany - Neunkirchen

Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 052

You deserved it 5 372

By Anonymous - 25/11/2009 06:06 - United States

Today, while on a vacation, I tried to step out of myself and flirt with this boy who I thought was cute. He was going along with it and nodding so I thought it was working. Then he opened his mouth and I realized he didn't speak English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 217

You deserved it 6 665

C'est la langue de l'amour!

By Anonymous - 19/10/2017 05:00

Today, my French teacher set up a role-play scenario to act out in front of the class. During one of my lines, I mispronounced a phrase and called my teacher sexy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 096

You deserved it 462

Tommy Liseau

By Anonymous - 17/03/2023 18:00 - United States

Today, I tried to seduce the girl I like by telling a joke. It turns out my delivery was so bad that she asked if I was auditioning for a new version of "The Room." FML

I agree, your life sucks 253

You deserved it 630

By dunicha - 17/11/2011 00:37 - United States

Today, I was reading a book in German, which I don't know very well. Suddenly I reached a passage I had no trouble understanding. Excited, I showed my husband, saying I was finally getting the hang of it. He laughed and patted my head. Turns out, that particular passage was a quote. In English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 377

You deserved it 38 335

By Jan - 27/02/2013 04:50 - United States - Ann Arbor

Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 291

You deserved it 4 327

No comprendo

By Anonymous - 26/02/2023 16:00

Today, I got lost in a foreign city while on vacation and couldn't communicate with anyone, because I didn't speak the language and no one seemed to be able, or even wanted, to speak to me in mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 335

You deserved it 1 003

By nullroute - 16/02/2016 11:34 - Switzerland

Today, I found out that while on foreign exchange for over six months now, I have been pronouncing the word for "night" in German wrong. Apparently, this whole time, the way that I have been pronouncing it in German means "naked". This explains a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 154

You deserved it 2 815

Better out than in

By Rachael - 03/07/2021 06:01 - United Kingdom

Today, I had my German oral exam. It was going well, until halfway through I did the biggest burp I could have ever imagined. I don't even know how to say sorry in German. FML

I agree, your life sucks 679

You deserved it 217

By Anonymous - 05/05/2012 21:16 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, my husband and I went on vacation. We got lost and had to ask the locals for directions to our hotel. Neither of us could understand their accents, and we ended up wandering around blindly for hours until we made it back on our own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 821

You deserved it 20 827

fadingfaith 4

Sunday 7 August 2011 1:45

Wow, haha. How did you find out you said that?

Molord1 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 1:45

Sounds like a strange Porno

Comments

thegumqueen 2

Thursday 29 December 2011 6:52

Wow, what was their response? Bet it was hilarious

imhope 23

Monday 30 December 2013 0:39

Well did you?

Laggaprone 12

Tuesday 11 August 2015 9:02

Maybe learn something like Spanish first?

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Today, I managed to not think too much about how alone I feel living in a strange city, and I went out to find a quiet place to write and eat. After I ordered my meal, I saw that I was the only diner that was sitting alone at a table. Then "All By Myself" came on the radio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 288

You deserved it 3 658

Today, I was at a party at the house of the guy I really like. We were talking when he pulled me into his room. I was excited he was finally taking our friendship to the next level, until he handed me a stick of deodorant, saying, "I didn't wanna tell you in the hallway, but you really need this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 368

You deserved it 22 249

The Top

Today I woke up, had sex with my husband, made breakfast with my kids, had coffee with my mum and sister, and took a call from my boss reminding me I'd agreed to come in today for a few hours for an important meeting. I got suspended without pay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 520

You deserved it 1 249

Today, I got my projects printed and spiral bound, only to get a text from my teacher 30 minutes later that everything must be in black and white. I paid extra money to have them in colour. When I asked her if colour was okay, she said, "I never asked for colour and I want it in black and white for everyone." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 061

You deserved it 279

Today, I went to the store to get Valentine's Day gifts to decorate my boyfriend's and my new apartment. He was there shopping with his wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 972

You deserved it 5 115

Today, I ran into a parked car and fell into the gutter. All because a dog suddenly barked at me. From the other side of a wooden fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 130

You deserved it 653

Today, my boyfriend got upset after I politely asked him to do the laundry. He takes every chance he gets to act macho and brag to people about how he's in the Marines, but apparently he is too much of a pussy to act like a man and clean his own clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 747

You deserved it 6 645

Today, I went into my classroom to find a bag of shit on my desk with a note saying, "Thanks for failing me b*tch!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 222

You deserved it 7 529