Love: Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose... - FML

By anonamous - 17/07/2009 16:59 - United States

Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose so I would have to cut off the ponytail that I've been growing since '99. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 231

You deserved it 96 729

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Same thing different taste

By benjavel71 - 10/01/2017 11:13 - United States - Prairie Grove

Today, I thought about going to visit an old girlfriend of mine with hopes of getting a little head. Unfortunately, I didn't know it would be head lice I'd get. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 804

You deserved it 9 118

By caliibbyy - 29/11/2010 05:03

Today, I found out my best friend has a massive head lice infestation. It wasn't until after I'd used her hairbrush to brush my hair that I figured it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 090

You deserved it 7 251

By hairy - 30/09/2013 21:59 - United Kingdom - Guildford

Today, I discovered that I have caught head lice from my son. Unfortunately, they are living in my chest hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 401

You deserved it 3 839

Hair issues

By Blake - 26/08/2022 00:00

Today, my wife is angry with me because after she'd convinced me to grow out my hair, it exposed my receding hairline. I shaved my head to the same appearance as when she married me, so I could feel more comfortable with my own body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 823

You deserved it 125

By Anonymous - 10/06/2016 01:08

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted to take a break. At least she gave me a parting gift. Lice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 235

You deserved it 963

By Anonymous - 26/06/2015 20:08 - United States - Clarksville

Today, after finally spending the night with my longtime crush, it's as if I can still feel her fingers caressing my hair. But wait, no, that's just the head lice she gave me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 346

You deserved it 3 006

Natty dread

By why???? - 05/09/2022 08:00

Today, I’ve been growing dreads for two years after I lost my hair to chemo. After visiting my boyfriend’s family, we all contracted lice from the kids. Even though I did the shampoo and treatment, my locks are too coiled to effectively comb out all the nits. I have to shave my head again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 463

You deserved it 408

By violetbcracecar - 14/12/2016 03:48 - United States - Suisun City

Today, for the first time in my life, I have lice. The dog we rescued infested our house. No amount of showering has made me feel clean, and my bald husband just doesn't understand why I'm so bothered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 598

You deserved it 955

By ItchItchBaby - 09/09/2017 13:00

Today, 2 hours before a 13-hour flight, I found out I had head lice. I'm a 24-year-old woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 112

You deserved it 474

By Baldy - 03/04/2011 09:16 - New Zealand

Today, my wife told me that she was leaving me for someone with more hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 606

You deserved it 4 765

Next

Top comments

pittsports87 0

Friday 17 July 2009 23:01

YDI for being a hippy

Greendarthpotato 0

Friday 17 July 2009 23:02

That is gross.

Comments

Elleundead95 2

Thursday 3 September 2009 8:04

Lol I'd never **** with my boyfriend's ponytail...

bella_d 0

Sunday 20 September 2009 20:13

I would shave her hair. she shouldnt have messed with yours

jillz 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 15:37

What a bitch! Ponytails on men are sexy. Replace her shampoo with Nair and then, while she's crying about her hair loss say, "how you like me now" OR "hey, at least now neither of us have to worry about head lice" FYL for having such crude wife. :p

Matilda_Bob 0

Thursday 22 October 2009 10:12

Seriously, nobody ever heard of shampoo against lice? Why would you cut your hair off if you didn't want to?!

onnielief 4

Saturday 21 November 2009 15:36

Ever hear of live shampoo? It will kill the lice and save your hair. I guess you totally deserved it after all, maybe your hair should be short so oxygen can reach your brain more easily.

terriibabiiix23 0

Sunday 13 December 2009 21:23

your wife is a ******* bitch.

lucifer69_fml 0

Monday 4 January 2010 3:13

hot couple, woman with lice, man with dirty long ponytail

bornincali 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 12:03

YDI........no grown married man should have a ponytail....Hippy!!!

CaptainCat 0

Saturday 3 April 2010 3:15

I dont think anyone's said this yet but..... How exactly did she on purpose give you lice? Did she hunt down someone who had it and pluck it outta there hair????? And why would she do that? That just puts lice in the house.

chicknugget5 4

Thursday 29 April 2010 20:04

y'all are ass holes

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The Top

Today, I finally got an interview for the job I want. The interviewer looked at my resumé and asked, "So, what have you been doing for the past 10 years?" I guess binge-watching Netflix wasn't the right answer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 1 118

Today, I'm pretty sure my husband of 8 years is sleeping with the skank who's in the fire department with him. Out of nowhere, he started texting her and wouldn’t come home until 12:30 a.m. for a whole week. When I confronted him about it, he flipped out. Sadly, it won’t be the first marriage she’s ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 202

You deserved it 182

The Top

Today, a kid from school came to my house. He asked my dad if I was at home, because we were "planning a bit of the old, you know…" and made an obscene gesture. Now I'm grounded for a month, and no matter what I say, my dad won't believe that I've never even spoken to the kid before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 776

You deserved it 2 348

Today, the court is unable to allow me to divorce my wife because she is pregnant with our child. I have to wait until AFTER the baby is born, so that she is born inside of a marriage and not be an "illegitimate child". I was planning to move out of our house to go live with my high school sweetheart this weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 367

You deserved it 2 952

Today, while sitting in a handicapped seat on the bus, an old man angrily approached me and chewed me out in front of everyone for not leaving the seat empty for "those who actually need it." Then he stormed off the bus, stepping heavily on my broken foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 623

You deserved it 4 504

Today, I realised just how caffeine dependent I am. I didn't have time for my morning coffee, work is out of milk, and I only have $1.30 in my bank account, so I couldn't buy a coffee. Today has been a struggle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 634

Today, at work, I served a group of three teens. Their tab was $75 and they tipped me nothing. They wrote a thank you on a piece of receipt paper, put it in a glass of water and used a coaster to turn the glass of water upside down on the table, spilling water everywhere. They also stole my pen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 065

You deserved it 4 429

Today, after waiting 2 hours for my landlord to leave so I could take a shit in peace, I sat down on the toilet. The doorbell immediately rang. It was my landlord, who wanted to let me know that he had just backed into my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 242

You deserved it 3 782