Miscellaneous: Today, I found out that the crazy old man that sleep walks naked... - FML

By Username - 02/08/2011 06:46 - United States

Today, I found out that the crazy old man that sleep walks naked around my neighborhood every night is my grandpa. And he's not sleepwalking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 876

You deserved it 2 874

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Same thing different taste

By meeeoow - 22/01/2011 10:05 - Australia

Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 665

You deserved it 2 777

By hellphone_fml - 01/07/2019 20:00

Today, someone knocked on my door. I yelled "Yeah?" while getting up, since it was locked. My grandpa walked in, as I apparently didn't actually lock it. I was naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 378

You deserved it 659

By IrisKitty - 18/08/2015 07:07 - United States - Englewood

Today, I found out my grandma sleeps in the nude. I witnessed her running naked from her bedroom to the bathroom, because she "didn't have enough time" to put on her robe. I need to get my own place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 759

You deserved it 6 854

By Anonymous - 29/12/2009 18:52 - Canada

Today, my mom informed me that she saw me sleepwalking last night. I didn't think much of it, until I remembered that I went to bed without any clothes on last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 571

You deserved it 6 879

Let it all dangle

By Anonymous - 08/10/2023 07:30 - United States

Today, my 76 year-old mother-in-law stayed the night at our house. I bumped into her on the way to the bathroom during the night. She discovered I sleep naked. Sadly, I found out that she does, too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 349

You deserved it 784

By yayme. - 11/07/2013 22:26 - United States - Bismarck

Today, I found out that the weird guy that lives next door is my biological father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 272

You deserved it 4 041

By laundry day again... - 08/09/2013 13:07 - United States

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, who has frequent night terrors, also sleepwalks. And apparently sleep-pisses on the bathroom rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 731

You deserved it 3 538

Dangleberries

By myeyesburn - 28/10/2019 14:00 - Canada

Today, I got up from bed after a good night's sleep, and walked outside. The first thing I saw was my 60-ish year-old neighbor bent over, picking up a newspaper. He was wearing nothing but a way too short bathrobe and a pair of rubber boots. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 577

You deserved it 171

By Anonymous - 05/07/2012 13:38 - United States - Hudson Falls

Today, I woke up to my drunk great grandfather peeing on my cat and thinking it was absolutely hysterical. This isn't the first time and he just moved in with me for the next six weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 638

You deserved it 2 244

By charlieg9 - 30/08/2013 12:33 - United States - East Meadow

Today, I found out that I'm the creepy uncle of the family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 273

You deserved it 15 865

Next

Top comments

317theterrible 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 16:03

Wish i had ur grandpa

BADDiam 4

Tuesday 2 August 2011 16:03

Cool grandpa you have there.

Comments

divadro102 16

Wednesday 3 August 2011 3:08

Each night? Looking at stars much?

tucker3 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 3:20

that's uh. a cool grandpa u got right there

MissCuteStack 12

Wednesday 3 August 2011 3:31

haha that's not creepy at all !!!!! haha I wonder what else ya grandpa does on his free time ... hump 20 year olds ??

smexehXredhead0 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 3:51

Jealous...

Piinkdottx3 5

Wednesday 3 August 2011 5:19

at least your grandpa still has the balls #badass

ImaSoxFan 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 5:47

Herbert from Family Guy immediately came to mind.

mickey36 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 6:24

eww haha weirdd

baccaz16 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 6:32

I hope u live in a nudist neighborhood...

sexxme 9

Wednesday 3 August 2011 6:43

hahaha I don't understand why you didn't laugh. come on now, that's hilarious.

junz_fml 0

Wednesday 3 August 2011 7:18

Join him!

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The Top

Today, I was on the webcam with my boyfriend. I could see that he was on the couch, and alone, so I took off my shirt and smiled, waiting to see his reaction. He smiled at me but then kept looking in another direction. I playfully asked "What's so distracting?" His answer: "History Channel". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 428

You deserved it 10 094

Today, I sent a kinky text message to my boyfriend. Within minutes I got a reply of, "Whoever this is, fuck off and give my girlfriend's phone back." Apparently I'm so bad at writing sexy messages that my boyfriend thought it was a prank from someone who'd stolen my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 973

You deserved it 10 760

The Top

Today, my boyfriend told me that he doesn't know why I think deepthroating is so uncomfortable. To prove his point, he grabbed my dildo and effortlessly slid it down his throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 965

You deserved it 6 173

Today, I returned home from my aunt's funeral abroad to find my boyfriend in bed with my sister, who claimed she was unable to fly due to the flu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 839

You deserved it 315

Today, my parents gave me a sock and card for my eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 700

You deserved it 3 935

Today, I accidentally sent a text message meant for my best friend to my boss. The text was about how much I hated my job and my boss's constant micromanagement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 293

You deserved it 1 054

Today, I had to explain to my dad how I rear-ended the car in front of me because of a particularly intense banjo solo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 614

You deserved it 19 894

Today, after almost 20 years of celibacy, a beautiful young woman surprisingly took interest in me, and we get along great. My close female friend, who I did once have feelings for, but who always made it clear she'd never see me "in that way" is having a full-blown emotional breakdown. Well, according to her husband anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 125