Miscellaneous: Today, I found out what getting slapped in the face with lettuce...

By moe - 27/05/2011 05:26 - United States

Today, I found out what getting slapped in the face with lettuce feels like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 730

You deserved it 7 729

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Same thing different taste

By thanksdad - 16/03/2014 19:28 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 820

You deserved it 6 292

By failureatlife - 27/04/2014 19:16 - United States - Ponchatoula

Today, after beating myself up for being useless and not being able to do anything right, I managed to choke almost to the point of blacking out, on a piece of lettuce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 354

You deserved it 6 189

By youknowwhatitis - 22/06/2011 13:31 - Australia

Today, I learned how to wolf-whistle properly, and then learned what it feels like to be slapped on the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 735

You deserved it 36 006

By Anonymous - 09/01/2016 03:20 - Canada

Today, I found out what unwashed, warty feet taste like after someone kicked me in the mouth with one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 269

You deserved it 1 816

By whydoihavecats - 04/08/2015 19:19 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out what mouse intestines squashed against my bare feet feels like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 502

You deserved it 2 660

Sorry Sharon

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 16:00

Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 635

You deserved it 239

By CA19oo - 20/03/2012 01:03 - United States - Buford

Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 744

You deserved it 2 077

By Face - 09/01/2010 10:12 - Australia

Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 353

You deserved it 34 743

By nothing_nobody - 23/06/2016 01:31

Today, I was volunteering at a local hospital. I was eagerly introducing myself to all the nurses, as I would be working with them all summer. It wasn't until I got home that I discovered the giant piece of lettuce stuck in my front teeth. So much for first impressions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 594

You deserved it 1 960

By nukebroadcast - 16/12/2010 06:32 - United States

Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 318

You deserved it 6 015

HannahForbesxo 13

Friday 27 May 2011 14:29

It's a shame OP didn't lettuce know how it actually feels.

habest 2

Friday 27 May 2011 12:11

Well at least the person doing the slapping was thinking healthy. ;)

Comments

fAiRyMaN3 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 18:35

you're retarded

Fruitmonster2 15

Saturday 28 May 2011 18:35

Well, whoever slapped you with the lettuce doesn't carrots for you. :3

HannahLouise96 13

Saturday 28 May 2011 23:23

Boooooo!

Fruitmonster2 15

Wednesday 8 June 2011 8:56

#96 can suck a big one. kthxbai. :D

Loaffer 2

Saturday 28 May 2011 22:12

wtf? that's freaking hilarious

thatsracist 0

Saturday 28 May 2011 23:51

u probably work @ subway

Noyes654 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 0:42

How is this relevant to anything?

steffielynn 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 4:26

there should be a 'what the hell' button

kitten3 3

Sunday 29 May 2011 22:26

hahahahahaaaha

acms728 0

Monday 30 May 2011 5:40

sweet how's it feel?

milky953 0

Monday 30 May 2011 16:06

mmmmmmmm.. sooo good

summerlaughlol 0

Monday 30 May 2011 17:42

wow my friend has done that twice to me, once was on her birthday while I was giving her a compliment

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The Top

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past four months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 109

You deserved it 3 775

Today, at work, I handed an old man his drink, and our fingers accidentally brushed. He gave me a creepy wink and a smile, but I ignored it. He's now been sitting in the store for two hours watching me. Only four hours to go until I get off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 829

You deserved it 2 483

The Top

Today, after weeks of me "forgetting" to buy meat and animal products, my husband asked to talk. I was hoping he was getting the hints that I wanted us to go vegan. He wanted me to get checked for early-onset dementia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 1 628

Today, the "hot" guy I've been talking to for a few weeks sent me a picture. He was very overweight and not good looking at all. He then followed up with, "Now send me one of you so I can prove to all of my friends that you're real." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 886

You deserved it 39 983

Today, I went on a date with my really attractive neighbor, and at the end, when I leaned in to make out with her, she shook my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 770

You deserved it 6 641

Today, after training for 3 months for a marathon, three weeks from race day I tripped and fell during my last long run and cracked a rib, so I took ten painful days off. I decided to go try a short run to see if maybe I could still try the race, and got attacked by a German Shepard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 113

Today, while in the shower, my roomates thought it would be really funny if they threw my cat in with me. The doctor who gave me the stitches also thought so. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 212

You deserved it 2 976

Today, my friend and I were in her mom's car talking about which job was harder: actor or artist. I said, "Art is easy. You just scribble on a piece of paper and call it abstract art." Her mom squinted at me in the rear-view mirror and my friend stopped talking. Then she said, "My mom is an artist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 063

You deserved it 50 766

Same thing different taste

Sorry Sharon

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