Kids: Today, I got a call from a man yelling and cursing at me, calling...

By Harry - 20/07/2011 07:40 - United States

Today, I got a call from a man yelling and cursing at me, calling me a "selfish no-life asshole" for getting his "baby girl" pregnant. I'm 29 and she is 27 and we have been married for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 651

You deserved it 3 200

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 12/06/2013 02:12 - United States

Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 270

You deserved it 3 318

By cchandler - 23/09/2009 01:10 - United States

Today, I received a phone call from the number of a "single" guy I met online. It was his wife, who is three months pregnant. She threatened to kick my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 337

You deserved it 8 041

By motherlylove - 08/07/2018 15:00

Today, my mother-in-law screamed at the top of her lungs in front of our friends and family that I was stealing her baby away from her. I'd only suggested we go home because he had a migraine. Her baby is 24 years-old and has been married to me for a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 537

You deserved it 286

By babyblues - 20/11/2012 19:45 - United States - Woodhaven

Today, this guy I've been dating for a few months freaked out and called his mom crying, because I told him I might be pregnant with his baby. He is 27. I haven't even taken a pregnancy test yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 893

You deserved it 31 004

Kinda sus

By Ifeelya - 15/01/2023 04:00

Today, I found out the boyfriend of 2 years is actually 22 years-old instead of the 28 that he told me. I'm turning 39 this year and I'm very pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 884

You deserved it 486

No! Noooo!

By Anonymous - 18/12/2015 01:59 - United States - Pleasanton

Today, I told my parents I was pregnant. They yelled at me until I started crying. I'm 31, married, and I have a good paying job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 957

You deserved it 1 956

Rollercoaster

By Anonymous - 05/03/2010 12:54 - United States

Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 717

You deserved it 3 659

People of Walmart

By Anonymous - 21/01/2015 14:34 - United States

Today, at Walmart, a crazy old woman bitched me out for being pregnant. She kept following me around, calling me a stupid teen slut and saying she hoped my baby died so I could live a "normal life." I'm 26 and just very short. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 975

You deserved it 2 710

By Bethany - 20/01/2011 21:37 - United Kingdom

Today, I called my ex boyfriend to tell him that not only am I still in love with him, I'm also three months pregnant with his child. Upon hearing the news, he swore, called me a pathetic liar, swore some more, and hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 442

You deserved it 15 848

Teenagers…

By Anonymous - 09/04/2022 10:00

Today, my 17 year-old is pregnant and I was fit to be furious, until my wife steamrollered over me to get to her, hugging her, and crying and how we’ll all raise it together as a big family. We can’t afford another baby. The daddy better be paying us something, or I’m gone kill him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 105

You deserved it 253

Fx13mz 7

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:05

Name the baby after him. Then it's all good.

TheRealHouse 7

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:32

Just apologize and explain that you usually cum on her face but you decided to try something different. He will understand.

Comments

bribearr 6

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:27

he's drunk. he'll forget in the morning.

FunnyVampire 2

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:29

alcohol is bad ppl ¬¬"

flyerfan101 9

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:33

wouldn't he be at the wedding?? he should kno that this day would be coming

starscouter 1

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:35

awe...sry man

jaff23 11

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:42

he probably didn't know you consummated the marriage already

sparxva 12

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:52

Brace for impact because she's definitely going to have some "daddy issues." That said, congratulations on becoming a father!

evebright 5

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:54

are you a selfish no-life asshole? do you have a job with which to support the end result of this pregnancy? cuz the psycho old man could have a point....

jcbinglis 7

Tuesday 2 October 2012 2:48

You have a valid point

scs90 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:55

damn your father in law is a prick

Madelinexo 6

Wednesday 20 July 2011 16:55

You're and adult and so is she, he doesn't have to see his grankid if he acts like a jerk.

TongueRing 1

Wednesday 20 July 2011 17:07

Honestly, that's funny! I would have just laughed in that guy's face. You're adults in a happy relationship, you can have kids if you want. Assuming the guy wasn't drunk, he needs to get a grip. Every parent has to realize that their kids are going to grow up, make their own choices, have sex, ect. If you can't ever accept that then you shouldn't be a parent =/ Easier said than done, but still.