Animals: Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's...

By APetsPet - 05/10/2009 19:23 - United States

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 451

You deserved it 4 444

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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By suspicious - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I received a lovely letter from the council telling me I have to cease the act of "breeding and selling cats" because someone from my Facebook reported me. I'm pretty sure I've never owned a cat or had one in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 578

You deserved it 3 040

By jnr1234 - 20/06/2012 02:15 - United States - Princeton

Today, I was sent a letter by the vet, saying my cat was late for her yearly checkup. My cat died last week and I'd had her cremated by the same people who had sent the letter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 630

You deserved it 2 478

By notacatperson - 01/03/2011 10:41 - United Kingdom

Today, I was informed that due to my cat being aggressive and attacking the postman several times, my mail would no longer be delivered to my address. I don't own a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 069

You deserved it 2 789

Sneakin' in a kitty

By Anonymous - 15/01/2022 08:02

Today, my wife brought home a kitten, telling me it had been abandoned. She must think I’m dumb, since our credit card statement shows that all last week she bought it from a breeder, then got it vaccinated and chipped at the vet's, and only now brought it home to feed me this pack of lies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 383

You deserved it 214

By kittynapper - 17/07/2014 23:32 - United States - Denver

Today, I found out that my cat, that I've had for 3 years, is actually my neighbor's missing cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 512

You deserved it 6 879

By Anonymous - 07/06/2017 20:00 - United States - Coplay

Today, my neighbor let me know that they've been taking care of my cats while I was away, including letting them in and out of my house. I don't own a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 170

You deserved it 270

Hissing booth

By Carey - 03/09/2023 16:00 - Australia

Today, I took my cat to the vet for a regular check-up. In the waiting room, she escaped from her carrier and created chaos, knocking over supplies, and hissing at everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 273

By blehhx - 09/04/2011 05:32 - United States

Today, I found out my cat is allergic to ME. No kidding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 008

You deserved it 4 387

By wasted_gas - 05/10/2013 16:00 - United States - Cumming

Today, I woke up, got dressed, and left for the 1 hour drive to the nearest vet. When I arrived, I realized that I left my cat in its carrier on my kitchen counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 797

You deserved it 27 031

Pure evil

By Anonymous - 04/09/2023 11:30 - United States - Greenville

Today, I got a call at work. My cat somehow managed to lock my boyfriend and dog out of the house. The rental manager charged us $25 to open the door. The cat seems quite pleased with herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 626

You deserved it 194

x0stormbringer 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 1:40

well have the cat sign it then

Flymeister 3

Tuesday 6 October 2009 1:38

LOL

Comments

jdkfgkjdfb 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:11

This gets favorited, definitely!

glostik 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:16

FYL. Either they're idiots, or they want your cat's pawprint-- Which still makes them idiots [:

NataleeC 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:19

lmfao!

scateice 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:24

L :D L

Duckasaurus 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:33

That's not even FYL, dude, your cat isn't a legal citizen. That means that he can't own you.

shamille 5

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:37

Cats own their people, it's not the other way around.

memechose 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:37

is your name Richard Parker??

amc122289 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:51

YES totally got the Life of Pi joke :D i actually just finished the book the other day...

CookieFairy 6

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:38

LMAO This is THE funniest thing I have ever heard. Thank you for making my day

JFox 8

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:39

Vogon-style bureaucracy.

rafaelaugusto94 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 2:45

I would kill the cat and terminate all contracts

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Sleep Work Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Relatable Animals Dogs Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, after two months of being broken up, and my ex still insisting she hadn't been cheating on me, I declared via text my intention to burn the rest of her stuff in the yard. This resulted in the guy she "hadn't been cheating on me with" kicking in my door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 516

You deserved it 389

Today, mid-sex, my wife told me to call her a nasty slut. I was kind of uncomfortable doing it, but I did it to make her horny. She started crying, because she didn’t realise how much it would hurt her feelings. Now I’m not sure if she’s mad at me or herself, but I’m scared either way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 737

You deserved it 280

The Top

Today, my boyfriend's 16-year-old daughter got a job. I'm 29, with a Master's degree and I'm still unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 741

You deserved it 615

Today, while I was getting intimate with my husband, he moaned someone else's name. He actually tried to explain himself by saying that he'd had a "divine encounter," and while "possessed by the Lord," he'd been told the name of our future daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 142

You deserved it 3 099

Today, I was invited to a counseling group for people with emotional problems. I brought the permission slip home for my mom to sign, only for her to accuse me of being a hypochondriacal, lazy, selfish bitch. And my friends wonder why I have problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 416

You deserved it 3 260

Today, I left my phone on the roof of my car after pumping gas. I drove off, and it wasn't until I heard a thud that I realized what had happened. Now my phone has a gash in the screen, and it's receiving angry texts from my girlfriend that I can't answer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 206

You deserved it 446

Today, I got several angry messages on Facebook, demanding to know how I could cheat on my wife. They didn't believe me when I said I had no idea what they meant. Turns out my wife made a sarcastic post about my "new mistress". She was talking about Fallout 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 332

You deserved it 3 022

Today, after months of isolating and shielding, suffering through the isolation of having caught COVID and letting my hygiene, diet and exercise programme go to shit, I can officially say my pubes are now longer than my penis, but it’s ok because my belly now hangs over my belt so I can’t even see it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 820

You deserved it 721