Love: Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé...

By StrandedWhale - 03/11/2013 07:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé stood by laughing his ass off as I repeatedly tried to stand up, only to be knocked back down again. I'm seven months pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 827

You deserved it 5 160

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Same thing different taste

By randomguy - 09/07/2012 15:09 - United States - Saylorsburg

Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 973

You deserved it 12 166

Slapstick

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 04:00

Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 627

You deserved it 135

By wifeofafainter - 24/09/2015 06:31 - United States - Bronx

Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 421

You deserved it 3 070

By coloris - 03/08/2019 00:01

Today, I came home on crutches. My dog was immediately afraid of them, and came running towards me, growling and barking. She ran right into me, knocking me over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 134

By Al - 22/06/2009 04:11 - United States

Today, I was walking around the park with my wife. Out of nowhere, a little girl on a bicycle slammed in to me, knocking me to the ground. As I rolled over, sure that my ankle was broken, her father ran over to me. He screamed, "Watch where you're going, douchebag!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 921

You deserved it 3 354

By Jacklyn - 18/03/2012 19:18 - United States - Chicago

Today, my fiancé and I decided to have a romantic rendezvous on the trampoline in our backyard. Or at least it was romantic, until I accidentally rolled off and all but crushed our dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 775

You deserved it 20 094

By Anonymous - 09/09/2010 20:09 - United States

Today, I saw a pregnant woman fall off her moped. As I helped her back up, I asked if her baby was okay. I was then blindsided by her brick of a purse while she screeched, "I'm not pregnant!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 648

You deserved it 14 678

Jogging is bad for you

By Broken - 17/06/2009 14:12 - United States

Today, I was running with my sister's dog. It had the brilliant idea of shooting between my legs and I immediately faceplanted on the cement. I now have a swollen nose and cuts all over my body. I'm a grown man who does martial arts and I got beat up by a dog the size of a baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 924

You deserved it 6 760

By Anonymous - 27/11/2011 22:46 - United States

Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 457

You deserved it 3 604

By -_- - 29/03/2011 02:22 - United States

Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 979

You deserved it 5 357

kaitieloo 22

Sunday 3 November 2013 15:33

Ultimate douchebag.

transcedental 18

Sunday 3 November 2013 15:36

This is the first time I actually say 'Fuuuck' while reading an FML, and I've been around here for years. This is too brutal for a pregnant lady, he should've taken care of you. Sorry, OP, I hope you're alright.

Comments

jsc9306 14

Monday 4 November 2013 4:59

Oh girl, this is only the beginning of the bullshit. Word of advice... Don't marry him.

Seabeast1000 4

Monday 4 November 2013 5:16

Wow, I hope your child is all human. Not part dog.

LordSatan 4

Monday 4 November 2013 5:19

I'm a dumbass

faireanjell 5

Monday 4 November 2013 5:56

Ex fiancé now?

K2BC 8

Monday 4 November 2013 6:29

What an ass face! I hope he apologized!

lizznichole 3

Monday 4 November 2013 6:33

what she failed to mention that it was probably a teacup yorkie lolol

ayenii 14

Thursday 27 September 2018 10:26

You can’t be knocked/bowled over by a dog that isn’t at least lab size. :/ Use your head.

ViviMage 38

Monday 4 November 2013 6:51

Your pregnant body and your unborn should be better protected! That is in part WHY we have partners! Doesn't your guy know you can seriously hurt the baby shoving things into the belly or injuring the mother when she is less able to heal? This is not funny. Think if you want this man around your baby. He needs a stern reality check that he was actually endangering a child. Even an unborn child.

the_real_dvd 21

Monday 4 November 2013 7:15

You let the wrong guy knock you up. He sounds immature, and it doesn't sound like he cares about you or your child enough. Both times my wife was pregnant she got the red carpet treatment. What a woman goes through to bear your seed is the ultimate honor. He doesn't respect that. I'd say give him a swift kick to his junk.