Miscellaneous: Today, I got so used to using this FML app while going to the...

By Anon - 25/05/2015 01:14 - United States - Twinsburg

Today, I got so used to using this FML app while going to the bathroom that when I opened it, I accidentally peed a little. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 114

You deserved it 12 102

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Same thing different taste

Keeping warm

By Anonymous - 22/01/2021 11:01

Today, thanks to my habit of peeing in the shower, I accidentally peed in the bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 256

You deserved it 1 297

By Anon - 25/08/2015 10:10 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 643

You deserved it 9 142

Sprinkler system

By missed - 25/06/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 1 391

By PeedMaPants - 16/08/2016 00:04 - United Kingdom - Meopham

Today, I started my first day at work. When I used the bathroom, I thought I was peeing into the bowl but it was actually leaking out. My pants kindly cleaned up the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 370

You deserved it 2 360

By Bianka05 - 19/07/2017 20:00

Today, after being on vacation for a week, my alarm sounded early in the morning. It scared me so badly I peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 989

You deserved it 961

AKA taking a screenshot

By Anonymous - 05/10/2020 11:02 - United States - White Plains

Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 107

You deserved it 394

By Oh dear - 05/07/2012 22:15 - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines - Kingstown

Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 618

You deserved it 2 732

By pissfaced - 02/01/2010 13:41 - New Zealand

Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 128

You deserved it 73 401

By Anonymous - 01/05/2009 04:11 - United States

Today, I had to pee really bad so I tried to unlock my door as fast as I could. I put my key in and turned it too hard, the key snapped inside. I ended up peeing on myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 895

You deserved it 13 669

By sarahrachel - 15/12/2015 03:30 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, while in the airport waiting to board, I got the sudden urge to pee, so I ran to the bathroom feeling like my bladder was about to burst. I was so focused on relieving my bladder that I failed to notice the diarrhea covering the toilet seat and the wall behind it until I was sitting in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 037

You deserved it 5 052

zAstonish 20

Monday 25 May 2015 11:59

On a scale of 1 to 10, how pissed were you?

rt58killer10 20

Monday 25 May 2015 11:59

The side effects of FML

Comments

NateshN 18

Monday 25 May 2015 19:34

She's probably from a german speaking country, where it is "Pawlow" :)

xNuclear_Summer 18

Monday 25 May 2015 19:58

Old habits die hard.

imbedderdenu 23

Monday 25 May 2015 20:34

what?

dolliieebaaby908 7

Monday 25 May 2015 20:48

using the app a little too much are we.?

False_Stupidity 41

Monday 25 May 2015 20:51

Can't pee? There's an app for that!

Mpineda57 11

Monday 25 May 2015 21:16

Getting a little to excited I see,

kkfantastic 7

Monday 25 May 2015 21:20

Hahaha I use FML on the toilet too. So, hopefully I won't pee myself. Fingers crossed. Or should I say, legs crossed?

bigdog80 10

Monday 25 May 2015 22:10

over excitement lol

laden_swallow09 34

Monday 25 May 2015 22:17

Pavlov would be proud.

bluefairy_fml 24

Tuesday 26 May 2015 12:19

I was going to say the same thing!

beararm 11

Tuesday 26 May 2015 0:53

I jst learnt something from fml

Keywords

Cats Animals Gross Relatable Health Poopoo peepee Creepy Scary Kids Mental health Parents Cold weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Love Dating Tinder Cute Work Transportation Cops Awkward Crush Sports Teachers Education AITA Weddings Public freakouts Mother in law

The Top

Today, I went to the pharmacy to purchase a brace for my sprained wrist. My wife and I had recently ran out of KY lotion, so I decided to pick up a bottle while I was there. It didn't occur to me that these two items could be perceived as being related until the cashier began to giggle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 564

You deserved it 6 649

Today, after staying at my boyfriend's house for the first time, I got in the shower. His bathroom door doesn't lock, so half way through my shower he walked in. Trying to be sexy, I pressed myself up against the glass, which turned out the be a door that opens outwards. I fell on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 099

You deserved it 42 357

The Top

Today, I learned that all of my "friends" refer to me as the, "Jar Jar Binks" of our circle of friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 526

You deserved it 469

Today, I have been released from jail because my idiot friends decided to get me a surprise hooker for my birthday. Turns out "Candy" was actually an undercover cop. My friends ditched me. I was the only one arrested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 314

You deserved it 4 632

Today, I was talking to my grandmother, who was lying down on the couch under a blanket watching TV. As I was leaving, I said "See you later Nana," and patted her on the shoulder. Her shoulder was soft, and moved more than I expected. It was her boob. I felt up my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 718

You deserved it 12 916

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because she apparently saw me making out with her sister. She doesn't even have a sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 472

You deserved it 4 679

Today, my girlfriend's grandparents walked in on us getting intimate. She immediately ran to the bathroom, leaving me alone with them. They only speak Spanish, which is not my first language. We discussed the movie she and I were "watching", all while I was naked under the sheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 225

You deserved it 463

Today, I went to my (now ex) boyfriend’s step-uncle’s wedding. He got absolutely wasted and kept talking about marrying me in front of his mom and step-dad, but was listing off who he would and wouldn’t invite, all in front of the people he wouldn’t invite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 95

Same thing different taste

Keeping warm

Sprinkler system

AKA taking a screenshot

Top comments

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