Intimacy: Today, I had a pretty big erection while getting checked out...

By Anonymous - 31/05/2009 17:34 - United States

Today, I had a pretty big erection while getting checked out at the airport. The security guard was scanning my potentially "dangerous" erection for at least one long minute in front of my wife, kids, and 20 people behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 577

You deserved it 13 120

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Same thing different taste

By jennyygrace - 11/07/2009 00:16 - United States

Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 610

You deserved it 41 650

By Anonymous - 17/04/2009 14:14 - United States

Today, I had to re-take an hour long MRI scan because I got an erection midway through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 163

You deserved it 17 277

TSA

By androgynous - 30/03/2009 17:44 - United States

Today, I was going through airport security. As my bags were being scanned, I was told that I was selected for extra searching. Right as the security guard was about to frisk me, he froze up and asked me, "You're a male, right?" I am, and I used to think that it was obvious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 565

You deserved it 4 755

By sufia - 29/09/2016 11:14 - Pakistan

Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 353

You deserved it 1 170

By Traveler - 09/10/2015 02:06

Today, I learned that your crotch can just light up on the body scanner in the airport for no apparent reason; and when that happens, a thorough pat down of that area will be performed by a confused security officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 171

You deserved it 1 658

By GothicbunnyxC - 28/01/2012 23:31 - Canada

Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 666

You deserved it 35 462

By Anonymous - 17/07/2010 06:16 - United States

Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 663

You deserved it 47 213

By ... - 27/11/2008 05:30 - France

Today, I was in India. At the airport, the men and women were being searched separately. The guy welcoming us pointed me towards the women's area. I had to explain to him that I was a guy. It took 15 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 122

You deserved it 3 888

Revealing

By doody - 30/12/2009 22:42 - United States

Today, I was in a busy airport bathroom with my three year-old son. While in the process of pulling my pants down, my son decided to open the stall door. I jumped up to yank the door closed, but not before the line of waiting women saw me with my pants wrapped around my ankles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 258

You deserved it 4 282

Volcanic eruption

By Anonymous - 10/01/2020 18:00

Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 358

You deserved it 978

_insertnamehere_ 0

Monday 1 June 2009 0:55

well, they had to make it sure it wouldn't go off at any time...

josface 0

Monday 1 June 2009 0:56

Poor kids.

Comments

steph_kat 1

Monday 1 June 2009 3:44

You can spin this in your favor, seriously.

theforeignone 0

Monday 1 June 2009 4:53

dear #9: WTF, male penises? as if penises had a gender.

24788 6

Monday 1 June 2009 4:54

It happens to everyone at some point.

alcohol89 0

Monday 1 June 2009 4:57

the scientific name is NRB No Reason Boner

spillproof 0

Monday 1 June 2009 5:00

#73. What? Do you need Viagra or something? "totally random out of the blue boners" can happen at any age. OP: That is really funny. Sorry you had to be searched and have people notice your untimely erection.

cheerthefkupism 0

Monday 1 June 2009 5:05

Y(probably)DI. What the hell was so awesome going through airport security that you were getting wood, man?

FadedPurplez 0

Monday 1 June 2009 5:29

Very stiff, and also very dangerous! D: FYL

zymn 6

Monday 1 June 2009 5:34

@20: you sound like some porno director. OP: i will wait for the porno.

spirited_away33 0

Monday 1 June 2009 5:36

I feel bad for the kids. You probably traumatised them for life.

hunkydory 0

Monday 1 June 2009 5:38

am i the only one really disgusted by this? the man was at an airport with his kids and wife and he's getting boners! nothing at a ******* airport should be giving you boners when you're with your family!!!