Geek: Today, I had my first day of soccer tryouts. We began with a...

By varsity soccer player - 19/08/2011 21:08 - United States

Today, I had my first day of soccer tryouts. We began with a two mile run. Trying to be honest for once, I didn't lie about my time. Everyone else did. I thus got the worst score, and had to run it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 273

You deserved it 4 554

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Fluffy - 11/01/2012 12:51 - United States

Today, I had to run a timed mile. I'm terrible at running. During the run, I thought I was doing a good job. That is, until the teacher told me to stop because I was three laps behind everyone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 931

You deserved it 6 243

By Anonymous - 04/09/2013 17:28 - United States - Dell Rapids

Today, my entire gym class had to run the 1600 with our coach calling out finishing times. My finishing time was reported as "3 days short of a year." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 143

You deserved it 7 261

By Anonymous - 27/08/2013 18:39 - United States - East Northport

Today, at soccer tryouts, the coach made us run the entire practice. I ran the whole two hours ahead of everyone. When the tryout ended, I vomited due to dehydration. I didn't make the team. The coach's reasoning: "Only the weak throw up". FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 980

You deserved it 5 206

Run home

By Anonymous - 12/06/2013 14:56 - United States

Today, I ran the mile in gym class. I was the second to last person to finish, and I was left panting and feeling faint. When the teacher found out I hadn't come in dead last, he accused me of skipping a lap and is now making me rerun the entire thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 104

You deserved it 6 194

Take the L

By slowrunner - 22/04/2009 13:20 - United States

Today, I was running the 100m sprint in a track meet. Me and another girl were tied for dead last. When we finished, she complained, "It's so embarrassing how slow I am today. I have shin splints. What happened to you?" I was actually running my hardest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 665

You deserved it 7 608

A little stiff and rusty

By Footloose - 11/09/2023 14:30

Today, I went for a run to get in shape for the first time in ages. I put on my running shoes and hit the pavement. Halfway through, the sole of one shoe came off, and I had to hobble back home in embarrassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 111

Good cause, bad knees

By Anonymous - 15/10/2023 22:00

Today, I took part in a charity run for a good cause. I'd trained for months and showed up, only to trip and fall flat on my face at the starting line. I spent the rest of the race with scraped knees and a bruised ego. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 151

The sweet sighs of disappointment

By ThatGuyWhoRolled - 05/01/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, I was up against two others in a 120m race on my school's sports day. Unexpectedly, I heard my name being chanted from most of the classes watching and well, this made me want to win so much that I leaned forward too much whilst running and ended up tripping and rolling on the track. I heard loud sighs after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 754

You deserved it 408

Running

By Anonymous - 13/09/2014 00:19 - United States - Farmingdale

Today, I ran one of the hardest cross-country courses in the country. I'm a pretty good runner, and I was feeling confident for the first mile. Then the Chipotle from last night's dinner hit, and my legs weren't the only thing running. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 029

You deserved it 9 864

By jj - 07/11/2014 05:47 - Australia - Windermere Park

Today, I was sick and had soccer trials on the same day. At the soccer trials, the coach called me over and told me I was doing really good and to keep it up. I said thanks and vomited on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 101

You deserved it 3 363

flockz 19

Saturday 20 August 2011 1:22

and therefore will be faster than everyone during the game. :D

heyy17 10

Saturday 20 August 2011 1:22

Well, they are all gonna suck on the field, don't worry coach WILL notice. And plus, you did the right thing!(:

Comments

Sweet_Testicles 7

Saturday 20 August 2011 1:41

and YDI for actually running it

GamerMatt97 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 1:43

hey at least u tried to be truthful thats all it matters.

waileybeem1994 1

Saturday 20 August 2011 1:52

I'm glad you were honest :) that's good for you.

himynameischeese 6

Saturday 20 August 2011 1:58

The truth hurts :(

Commander223 9

Saturday 20 August 2011 2:02

In soviet Russia, eh screw it.

xXSillyLoveXx 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 2:03

You'll be the fittest on the team! Ladies love that, keep up the honesty

markusse 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 2:06

Because when someone tries out for a soc er team, theyre kids? No work places has soccer teams... Only schools... XD

KiddNYC1O 20

Saturday 20 August 2011 4:05

Thank you.

mattmalin11 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 2:06

41st!

decko44 7

Saturday 20 August 2011 2:07

Fail troll is fail...

RA661 8

Saturday 20 August 2011 2:08

It will pay off. :)

skylerXx 6

Saturday 20 August 2011 2:10

Sometimes, honesty gets you no where.

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Dogs Animals Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, I told my son to get a job and start paying rent. Five minutes later he transferred me rent for the next 5 years. When I demanded to know where he got that kind of money, he showed me his bank statements. He’s made more money mining Bitcoin than I’ve made in 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 273

You deserved it 1 363

Today, there was a long queue at the store, and behind me were two senior citizens. I wanted to do a good deed, so I said, "Cut before me in line, I have all the time in the world." My reward? The old man scolded me because I supposedly insinuated that they were old, and only had a short time left to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 423

You deserved it 13 444

The Top

Today, while brushing my teeth I noticed a hair in the sink. Running the scenario over in my mind, I was going to simultaneously spit into the sink and throw the hair on the floor. Creating a big ball of phlegm, I threw the hair back into the sink and launched a huge mouthful onto the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 076

You deserved it 2 957

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. It's okay, I know who the father is: my ex-boyfriend, who moved to Japan last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 057

You deserved it 12 028

Today, my older boyfriend and I went shopping together. When we arrived at the till, the cashier looked at me and asked, "Is this your pop?" I replied "No, this is my boyfriend, but we get that a lot." She paused, pointed at the case of Coke in the cart and said again, "Is this your pop?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 660

You deserved it 3 142

Today, a patient was late for a psychiatry appointment, after having missed his previous two. I am the medical student on the team that was supposed to do his assessment. I said, "You snooze, you lose." Everyone stopped and looked at me. Apparently, he missed them because he has narcolepsy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 332

You deserved it 49 457

Today, I'm eight months pregnant with my second child. My 18-month-old son loves to watch my belly move when his baby brother moves. And then loves to smack my belly. It's going to be a long eighteen years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 190

You deserved it 5 845

Today, my intern was given his own office. I have been asking to move out of my cubicle for nearly four years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 482

You deserved it 2 297