Health, Sex, Relatable and Intimacy: Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After...

By JoshuasGirl - 23/12/2013 19:13 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 098

You deserved it 6 453

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/08/2014 21:24 - Portugal - Alg

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 807

You deserved it 6 736

First time?

By Anonymous - 29/11/2013 11:56 - United States - Westminster

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 285

You deserved it 6 901

Heartless swine

By Anonymous - 15/09/2015 05:56 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 023

You deserved it 4 391

Follow the script

By ufhdafuhds - 19/03/2009 23:31 - Egypt

Today, I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pocket. Turns out he'd written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 139 355

You deserved it 14 494

Absolute beginners

By Anonymous - 13/07/2014 20:00 - Spain - Ripollet

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to make love for the first time. The moment my bra came off, he started hyperventilating to the point of blacking out. So much for that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 924

You deserved it 5 972

By anon - 08/12/2012 05:33 - United States

Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 468

You deserved it 5 443

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 163

You deserved it 4 026

By disapointed girl - 28/12/2009 16:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 008

You deserved it 5 892

By Confused - 22/08/2012 16:33 - Spain - Madrid

Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 767

You deserved it 4 416

By firsttimer69 - 20/03/2009 06:11 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151 709

You deserved it 15 192

Krystal3408 32

Monday 23 December 2013 23:46

Well at least you know he cared.

DanBerryKrinkle 4

Monday 23 December 2013 23:49

oh joshua...

Comments

brandoneyez1 25

Tuesday 24 December 2013 7:49

Did svu show up at your door? Lol

r00nie 10

Tuesday 24 December 2013 8:07

wow.. so much judgement here! Not like anyone here was Don Juan their first time.

mkimbee 9

Tuesday 24 December 2013 9:30

Oh my. A lot of you kids need a bit more sex ed stacked with some lessons in human anatomy.

ogimod 4

Tuesday 24 December 2013 10:49

sounds like you two are really young; perhaps you should refrain from sex and worry about your education??

limabeans101029 20

Tuesday 24 December 2013 15:58

What makes you think they're really young?

Larsh 4

Tuesday 24 December 2013 11:34

Don't choke him so hard next time

Kukurugya 11

Tuesday 24 December 2013 13:55

it seems like half the commenters are virgins trying to act like they know what's going on

zahidnasir 22

Tuesday 24 December 2013 14:52

its non of his business though

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 24 December 2013 18:02

Better then vomiting right? Maybe next time he'll stay awake...

JoshuasGirl 10

Monday 30 December 2013 5:44

he did throw up... when he woke up

Omniprism 14

Tuesday 24 December 2013 18:17

It was the excitement. I bet he'd been thinking of this since the first time he met you.

dangermouse2990 19

Tuesday 24 December 2013 22:04

Nice one Joshua

Keywords

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I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 9

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You deserved it 3 982

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You deserved it 5 542

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I agree, your life sucks 3 564

You deserved it 244

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I agree, your life sucks 31 226

You deserved it 7 900

Today, I was in the shops and the lights all of a sudden went out. I got really scared for no reason because it was pitch black and grabbed onto my mum's hand. When the light's got turned on I was holding on to a random guy's hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 359

You deserved it 9 605

Today, while I was working replacing a windshield, some jerk off hit my truck. A truck carrying 2 grand in glass. Including the windshield I was about to install. The driver gets out and says, "Sorry man, I had to text my girlfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 847

You deserved it 1 253

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I agree, your life sucks 25 344

You deserved it 3 788