Kids: Today, I had to explain to my one person on my staff why having...

By AntiBobTheBuilder - 02/03/2011 05:22 - United States

Today, I had to explain to my one person on my staff why having kids aged 6 to 9 hammering in screws with the butt end of a screwdriver is neither safe, nor a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 466

You deserved it 3 023

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By m0m - 04/03/2016 14:01 - Belgium - Brasschaat

Today, I had to explain to my 27 year-old sister why a stainless steel fork isn't a good toy for my 8 month-old baby. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 048

You deserved it 1 673

What a tool

By Anonymous - 02/07/2020 17:01

Today, my husband told me he didn't want me to get power tools to build things, because he thinks a miter saw and a sanding orbiter are more dangerous than guns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 325

You deserved it 175

Gun control

By Anonymous - 14/12/2021 20:01

Today, our 9 year-old son managed to shoot himself in the gut with my nail gun. According to my wife, this is completely my fault, because I ONLY kept it in my locked garage, ONLY secured in its box, ONLY completely disconnected from the power, ONLY on the highest shelf near the roof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 417

You deserved it 154

By tylerlove361 - 11/02/2009 05:30 - United States

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 077

You deserved it 34 033

By kaitlyna15 - 01/08/2012 01:54 - United States - Bellevue

Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 010

You deserved it 1 809

By mandm - 24/09/2013 21:01 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I had to explain to my son why it is not okay to slap old women's butts. He's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 248

You deserved it 4 952

Relic job

By Anonymous - 29/05/2015 19:18 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I had to explain to my little sister that not all guitars are supposed to have a hole in them, that when I was talking about "breaking it in" I didn't mean I'd smash a hole in it, and that she shouldn't have taken a hammer to my expensive new guitar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 596

You deserved it 2 837

By Mak10 - 10/12/2010 06:53 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that if you tell your child that they're old enough to cook their own food in the microwave, you have to make sure they're smart enough not to put the metal spoon in with the food as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 301

You deserved it 36 987

By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 06:02 - United States

Today, I managed to staple my finger while showing my kindergartner class how to properly use one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 375

You deserved it 24 232

By latter - 24/09/2013 00:05 - United States - Middle River

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 315

You deserved it 3 311

bigsc 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 11:56

there are so many things wrong with that

ilaleahcim 6

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:13

There are so many things wrong with this sentence.

Comments

bigsc 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 11:56

there are so many things wrong with that

insanesna1l 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:00

yeah, slave labour is losing the quality it used to have

rallets 22

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:49

is one person considered a staff? a staff is multiple employees...or a magical stick

piiing 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 20:07

op needs to work on their grammar

countryboyj17 0

Thursday 3 March 2011 6:26

55 care to correct him..?

benefiits 0

Thursday 3 March 2011 7:49

op said one person ON the staff so it should be correct

ScaughtieHolden 11

Wednesday 2 March 2011 11:59

69 ;D

metallakes 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 13:05

THATS THE FIRST THING I SAW!

MissBunny25 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 15:53

oh god my eyes..

BIGshooter 2

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:01

miss bunny you are beautiful.

MissBunny25 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:06

thank youu :)

tattortotamus 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:46

I was thinking th same thing she really is gorgeous.

MissBunny25 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:52

kk this is a tad embarrassing :$ lol but thanks

quin01 0

Thursday 3 March 2011 0:13

#18 omfg sameee

wakeNmakePIZZA 0

Saturday 5 March 2011 0:21

me 2

ilaleahcim 6

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:13

There are so many things wrong with this sentence.

marinus_fml 19

Wednesday 2 March 2011 14:35

In fact, there is nothing wrong with your sentence...

IzBtrolololin 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:16

this made no sense and confused me.

you_freak 7

Wednesday 2 March 2011 15:26

Agreed, I had to read it a few times to figure out what was going on...

skull4k9 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:17

she should have just let them use hammers their much safer lol

NerdsWillRule 3

Saturday 9 June 2012 8:44

They're*.

Juliaa15 6

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:21

Been there, done that.

valri3 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:27

Some peoples wrote, sentences wrong. :(

MrLaryRottweila 1

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:29

Do you work at McDonalds?

instnt1nfction 17

Wednesday 2 March 2011 13:41

that defiantly makes sense

BleakAsFcuk 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 15:15

Your sentence definitely makes sense.

Jimboom 11

Wednesday 2 March 2011 12:34

Exactly.. I mean their little hands are way to small to properly use a screwdriver.... should have given them a hammer. ;-)

truthinlies 1

Wednesday 2 March 2011 14:58

you don't use a hammer on screws screw the screws and nail nails

calcetines 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 15:11

Truthinlies, I love your use of metaphor in saying "screw" and "nail" when you actually meant Jimbiim's mother! ;)

DocBastard 38

Wednesday 2 March 2011 15:54

Truthinlies, you're an idiot. OP said the kids were using the butt end of a screwdriver to try to hammer in nails. Learn to read. Calcetines, you're an even bigger idiot. That was such a failed attempt at humour. The sound of cows being slaughtered was funnier than that.