Love: Today, I had to play Paper, Rock or Scissors and beat my boyfriend...

By Today - 07/09/2010 02:26 - United States

Today, I had to play Paper, Rock or Scissors and beat my boyfriend in order to get him to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 303

You deserved it 6 597

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Stuck in the middle with you

By Carrie - 28/03/2020 02:00

Today, I had to beg and argue with my boyfriend to get him to take a shower and brush his teeth. This has become a recurring argument now we're confined together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 652

You deserved it 282

By fthislyfe - 02/07/2011 14:06 - United States

Today, while arm wrestling with my boyfriend, I had to pretend he beat me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 352

You deserved it 7 951

Gross dude

By summer - 26/03/2021 21:30

Today, I had to beg my boyfriend to get him to take a shower and brush his teeth. This is a basic weekly argument. FML

I agree, your life sucks 877

You deserved it 328

My feefees

By Anonymous - 17/02/2023 00:00

Today, I beat my boyfriend at chess, whilst also doing my homework and cooking dinner, and he got upset about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 755

You deserved it 130

Gross dude, dude

By GhostPenguin - 08/10/2021 11:01 - United States - Ann Arbor

Today, I had to tell my 30 year-old boyfriend to take a shower, or else he won't for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 870

You deserved it 179

By Georgia - 13/05/2011 01:02

Today, my boyfriend turned down a shower with me because he didn't want to get his hair wet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 567

You deserved it 6 063

By I warned him - 19/12/2014 02:39 - United States - Marietta

Today, I beat my boyfriend in a video game. He promptly dumped me and told me to leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 117

You deserved it 4 643

By HK - 16/05/2012 22:38 - United Kingdom - Haywards Heath

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 021

You deserved it 3 828

Revenge!

By princess98 - 18/11/2019 05:00

Today, I had to ask my boyfriend to take a shower, because he smelt awful and wanted to cuddle. After 45 minutes, he did so. I wanted to cuddle and fool around after he was done. I got rejected because he didn't want to get dirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 185

You deserved it 815

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 14:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 289

You deserved it 30 212

jacetopia96 1

Tuesday 7 September 2010 9:36

I thought it was Rock, Paper, Scissors?

unfortunate_13 5

Tuesday 7 September 2010 9:13

no shower, no sex. it's as simple as that.

Comments

sk8ergirl553 0

Tuesday 7 September 2010 16:13

its Rock Paper scissors! in that order.

samuelmartin 0

Tuesday 7 September 2010 16:41

ydi cause its rock paper scissors not paper scissors rock

dyld921 2

Tuesday 7 September 2010 16:56

Hey, at least you win at all ;)

bigredmonkeybutt 28

Tuesday 7 September 2010 17:33

hahahah The bf wins but he should've demanded a bj before & after the shower.

maddie30000 4

Tuesday 7 September 2010 18:25

dump his ass!

fatmalloy 0

Tuesday 7 September 2010 18:30

it's ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS!

silentfog 0

Tuesday 7 September 2010 18:46

who says paper rock scissors

Igor_g5 0

Tuesday 7 September 2010 18:58

Dump his stinky ass.

Zacham 5

Tuesday 7 September 2010 19:02

that's nasty, I couldn't date someone who doesn't bathe daily

StitchedBear 0

Tuesday 7 September 2010 19:13

hahha funny

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Love Embarrassing Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, I yelled at one of my employees for trying to discreetly slip out of a meeting, and demanded he sit up front so I could make sure he stayed for the whole time. Three minutes later, he shat his pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58

You deserved it 1 062

Today, it is mine and my twin sister's birthday. We both wanted a day at the spa for our birthday. My sister got a gift certificate to the spa, while I got mouthwash and a $20 gift card to Target. My mom said it would cost too much to make me also pretty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121 781

You deserved it 5 987

The Top

Today, I had to cancel my wedding because my fiancé is so hungover from his bachelor party, he's throwing up all over the place, can't stand up straight and is calling me by the stripper's name he met yesterday night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 234

You deserved it 460

Today, I surprised my girlfriend of 3 years with Stone Sour and Korn tickets, since I knew how badly she wanted to go. She responded by asking if we could go as just friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 768

You deserved it 336

Today, my husband popped out to the hotel gym while I jumped in the shower. After a while I heard a knock on the door. Thinking it was him, I cheekily opened the door in my naked glory to be greeted by the maid. I didn’t know do-not-disturb signs aren’t double sided. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 546

You deserved it 3 455

Today, I'm sitting at the vet's office while they run expensive tests on my cat. This is to make sure he doesn't have a bowel obstruction from eating the condom that my partner and I used last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 270

You deserved it 1 784

Today, it was my boyfriend's grandfather's funeral and visitation. These things make me nervous, and not thinking, I made comments that included the words "killing", "dying", and "death". I'm a rubbish support system. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 941

You deserved it 7 508

Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 192

You deserved it 6 801