Miscellaneous: Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to... - FML

By oxjessiiox - 11/10/2009 15:42 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 177

You deserved it 29 819

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/11/2015 15:28 - United States - Jamestown

Today, I was in a play and had a battle scene. I got a little too into it and wound up twisting my ankle. The audience was treated to me screaming like a little girl before face-planting the stage a moment later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 437

You deserved it 3 554

By Anonymous - 09/02/2013 01:00 - Netherlands - Zwijndrecht

Today, I was rehearsing for a school play. My drama teacher keeps criticising the part where I fake-trip, saying I make it look terribly fake. During today's rehearsal, I actually tripped for real, and smashed my kneecaps against the floor with a scream. He still said my "acting" sucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 513

You deserved it 2 912

By seussical65 - 14/04/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, during dress rehearsal before the show, I came in with crutches pretending I broke my leg as a joke. I then threw away the crutches, laughed and then fell down some stairs. I am now in crutches with a broken leg. I was the lead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 739

You deserved it 93 545

Act three, scene one

By anon - 12/08/2024 14:00 - New Zealand

Today, I was performing in a community theater production. Right before my big scene, I felt a sneeze coming on. I tried to hold it in, but it came out with such force that I lost my balance, fell off the stage, and landed in the lap of the mayor, who was in the front row. My character’s dramatic entrance was unforgettable for all the wrong reasons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377

You deserved it 128

By Nurse - 31/08/2018 15:00

Today, a pregnant woman asked me to give her a demonstration on how to push when having a baby. I agreed and pushed, but I may have pushed a little too hard because I shat myself. The pregnant woman laughed and said she was hoping that would happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 885

You deserved it 753

By ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 765

You deserved it 40 919

By gassy - 29/12/2012 09:32 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I auditioned for a role in ballet. My stomach was in pain and as I ran to be lifted into the air by my partner, I let out a huge fart. The auditorium was dead silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 498

You deserved it 4 634

Theater kid

By juliet - 06/04/2009 04:39 - Canada

Today, my theatre teacher made me go on stage even though I had a violent stomach flu. My understudies were unreachable, and she threatened to fail me if I did not perform. Halfway through the first act, I vomited on the first row. She failed me for letting the cast down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133 247

You deserved it 6 302

By superman_not - 10/06/2009 15:46 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to play the role of Superman in a production on stage. They had to stuff my underwear because my 'thing' wasn't big enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 868

You deserved it 7 361

Inappropriate Billy Joel

By Anonymous - 18/04/2016 19:28 - United States - Carlisle

Today, I performed a piano piece at a school play. Everything went well until I got up and accidentally smashed my shin against one of the piano legs. Before I could bite my tongue, I'd already yelled "Fucking hell!" in front of about 50 second graders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 794

You deserved it 5 177

Next

Top comments

Sweny 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:17

Fyl,shit happens :P

YDIxLol 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:17

Ouch, that sucks... But it's a little funny. :)

Comments

rosierosierosie 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:40

hahahahahahahaa unfortunate at least it made it more realistic

Zazu7711 0

Monday 12 October 2009 0:25

rofl

Witchcraft_fml 4

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:41

When you felt crap start to slide out, you should have clenched your ass. :] So did it fall out onto the stage, or did you just finish the play/wait until intermission/wait until costume change to shake it into the toilet? Or... >.> Did you sit on it?

AntiChrist7 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:43

actors are always full of crap

Witchcraft_fml 4

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:50

I hate myself for not thinking of that one. You win.

Gefangene 0

Monday 12 October 2009 1:35

wow, I feel like my name should be devillover, or darkchyld, or something really weird to reply to these two comments, lol. sorry, Im a smart ass but i seriously lol'd at this one epicness:)

Christina21 2

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:49

Lol,damn, u still kinda did, cuz i heard that could actually happen when a person gives birth

xoxcinderellaxox 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:53

ydi... you had to have at least known the possibility of that happening. i would have rather been remembered as the worst actor than been remembered as the actor who crapped herself onstage.

darkmis1 17

Sunday 11 October 2009 20:58

25-the OP is a girl, not a boy OP-that sucks, but at least it wuz realistic-people do crap when giving birth sometimes.

theatregrl2 0

Monday 12 October 2009 8:02

that would be why #25 referred to the OP as "herself". Actor is a unisex word.

shadexilmaendu 4

Sunday 21 August 2011 23:50

Uhh... Actress?? Your name is theater girl and you dont know that? Actor and bravo for men, actress and brava for women. O.o

june1903 7

Sunday 11 October 2009 21:00

Did the audience shit bricks?

tumandro 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 21:04

Well technically you did give birth to something...

sephirothyeti 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 21:06

Hahaha, that's disgusting. Hopefully that was the last scene you had to do so you could just leave.

cerebellum_fml 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 21:07

Dont get all mushy, you had a play to finish.

mcdonna 3

Monday 12 October 2009 17:56

another question was the poo mushy? :P sorry i just had to say that

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I agree, your life sucks 961

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I agree, your life sucks 42 755

You deserved it 3 256

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I agree, your life sucks 39 955

You deserved it 2 710

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I agree, your life sucks 885

You deserved it 181

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I agree, your life sucks 44 427

You deserved it 6 089