Work: Today, I handed out 20 resumes to a variety of stores. To my...

By mareecasellafml - 27/03/2015 09:51 - Australia - Belrose

Today, I handed out 20 resumes to a variety of stores. To my delight, I got a phone call the same day. Unfortunately, they weren't calling about a job, they were informing me on my resume it says, "I have a dick." All thanks to my boyfriend, who thought it would be hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 433

You deserved it 4 248

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Same thing different taste

By waitingformyfoodstamps - 24/01/2009 10:50 - United States

Today, I sent out my resume to about a dozen jobs on Craigslist. I realized that I hadn't updated it in a while and went to double check it after the fact. My ex at some point had changed my objective to "I'm a cocksucker who needs a job real bad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 113

You deserved it 8 395

Forwarded

By Anonymous - 18/11/2010 16:27 - United States

Today, my boyfriend emailed me this morning to let me know that he had forwarded the joke that I had sent to him to all of his workmates and friends. He was quickly given the heads-up by one of his friends that all of our intimate emails from the day were also included. I'm dating a dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 275

You deserved it 7 759

By nojob - 07/05/2009 19:15 - Canada

Today, I was desperately handing out resumes. I came to my local grocery store and asked for a job application, the customer service rep told me all she needed was my resume. I smiled and gave it to her only to see her read it, laugh and put it straight in the garbage as I walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 147

You deserved it 4 473

By babyfatt - 16/12/2009 08:23 - Australia

Today, I handed my resume in to a cafe that was hiring. I returned home and noticed a voicemail, it was one from the boss for a trial. I eagerly returned the call, showing my enthusiasm. Without thinking, I ended with "ok love you. *GASP* ah, BYE" and quickly hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 613

You deserved it 27 221

By Anonymous - 18/10/2009 10:52 - Australia

Today, I handed out 30 resumes only to find out, after the last resume was handed out, my brother had changed the last sentence of every paragraph to 'I am a massive douche bag.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 916

You deserved it 7 784

By Jobless - 13/08/2009 01:47 - United States

Today, my 16 yr old cousin needed help making a job resume so I give him mine to see as an example. He changed my name to his and it got him a job right away. The sad part? I handed my resume out to about 30 places and I am still unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 982

You deserved it 4 356

Hey you

By pappy - 03/05/2019 13:00 - United States - Lees Summit

Today, my friend asked me if I flirted with any girls during our shift. I said, "No, not any I could think of." He then told me there was a note on my windshield that said, "Call me" with a phone number on it. After my shift, I went to my car excited and read the note. It was just a penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 961

You deserved it 317

By Anonymous - 16/05/2012 20:34 - Netherlands - Kerkrade

Today, I called my boyfriend during his lunch break. He started to place his order at a fast food joint, and trying to be funny, I started moaning sexily after each part of his order. I eventually realised I was on speaker when I heard snickering in the background. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 738

You deserved it 32 283

By iamnotfat - 06/02/2009 22:14 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's work to surprise him. When I got there, I called him on his phone to tell him to turn around. I saw him look at his phone. His co-worker next to him asked who that was. He replied, "Just this fat chick I know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 774

You deserved it 4 496

By I'm a joke? - 30/05/2013 05:37

Today, I found out that me having a boyfriend is an on-going family joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 646

You deserved it 4 182

ohjoy15 33

Friday 27 March 2015 16:51

Proofread. Can never do it too many times.

cutycat136 28

Friday 27 March 2015 16:53

Make him stand on the side of the road with a big sign that reads 'I messed up my girls resumes and wrote on them that she had a dick. I am the dick'

Comments

fordneagles 34

Friday 27 March 2015 17:36

You deserve it for not proofreading before handing them out.

ratorr2 23

Friday 27 March 2015 18:06

I'm sure she checked it several times when she first created it. She shouldn't have to re-proofread her own resume when SHE's the one who wrote it.

thejonac 21

Friday 27 March 2015 17:41

tbh i think that wasn't a joke to be played, he could've done it elsewhere, but a job is a serious matter. have a talk to him?

elusiveshame 22

Friday 27 March 2015 17:47

The breakup talk, hopefully. Anyone who messes with your livelihood isn't someone you should be involved with.

elusiveshame 22

Friday 27 March 2015 17:46

You deserve it for 1.) not proof reading your resume, and 2.) not protecting your personal files from being tampered with.

TADspace 30

Friday 27 March 2015 17:51

Look on the bright side, at least they read it?

Awesumous_ 5

Friday 27 March 2015 17:53

Proofread it first, and dump him

bayy1432 14

Friday 27 March 2015 18:00

FYL indeed but also YDI for not proofreading it

classicsparkles 17

Friday 27 March 2015 18:13

Apparently your boyfriend decided to include himself on your resume.

jqmalang 17

Friday 27 March 2015 18:14

You should of double checked before printing them out. But you have to agree, that is funny.

heryseshta 9

Friday 27 March 2015 19:23

Messing with someone's future like that isn't funny, it's disrespectful.

BigxXxDeal 14

Friday 27 March 2015 21:49

well he shouldn't have done it no. but she should have checked it too... funny thought but probably shouldn't have been executed

Bragi 12

Friday 27 March 2015 18:28

Listen up, y'all: 1. There is a limit to how many time you proof read something. Once it's done and named "resume_final" that's it. 2. If you have to protect your resume from your bf, your mistake was not in data management. OP: this cannot have been the first time he showed himself. YDI.