Health: Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained...

By Igor - 19/12/2012 05:16 - United States - Lansdale

Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 341

You deserved it 4 098

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Same thing different taste

Slipping up

By Anonymous - 18/10/2010 23:28 - United States

Today, I slipped and sprained my ankle while shopping for a present for my husband, who later came home and tripped over my elevated leg, hurting my ankle again. Now I have an excruciating sprain, and a spouse who's furious at me because, I "shouldn't have tried to surprise him." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 369

You deserved it 2 860

By RootalyTootToot - 29/06/2018 15:00

Today, after slipping on my stairs and spraining my ankle, I got a brace and crutches at urgent care. When I went to get into my car, my crutch slipped on some paper and I fell. I crawled back into urgent care, only to learn that my sprained ankle is now broken in 2 places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 358

You deserved it 275

Bad omen

By KarmasPlaything - 14/08/2021 02:01 - United States - Shallotte

Today, I’m on vacation with my fiancé and his kids. We came to see a wedding venue. Too bad I severely sprained my ankle. I also sprained that same ankle when he proposed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 785

You deserved it 112

By Anonymous - 21/08/2015 01:42 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by offering me a foot massage to ease my sore feet after a run. I asked for a lot of pressure. Now I'm back home in a walking boot after being diagnosed with a fractured fifth metatarsal bone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 575

You deserved it 5 414

Unreasonable

By Anonymous - 17/02/2021 20:01

Today, I had to choose between being in excruciating pain and having a happy significant other by doing housework, or resting my sprained ankle and having my significant other pissed off at me because she thinks I’m milking it. She went to bed two hours ago and I can barely move it. Guess which I chose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 209

Hammer-headed

By Anonymous - 11/08/2014 16:27 - Canada - Saint John

Today, after ignoring my concerns and declaring that "safety equipment is for pussies", my husband went rock climbing for the first time. He only sprained his ankle, but is acting like it's broken. He's now playing video games in bed and pissing in a bucket, because walking is "too painful." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 259

You deserved it 4 938

On the move

By c-Ouch - 07/07/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, my wife yelled at me for not helping her rearrange the furniture. I have a sprained shoulder and have been ordered by my doctor to avoid heavy lifting. She said, "Move the couch or sleep on it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 556

You deserved it 92

By WTA - 20/02/2012 17:36 - United States

Today, I tried to impress my wife by doing a bunch of push-ups, despite having a bad shoulder. She told me my form sucks and that I'm an idiot. Now I can barely move my arm and I'm going to have to get it fixed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 655

You deserved it 34 933

By Graham Watson - 01/07/2019 16:00

Today, I'm currently in hospital with a painful and swollen Achille's heel problem. I was dreaming of running down stairs. I then tripped on one, and as I whacked my foot on the stairs in my dream, I also raised my foot and whacked it on the end of the hospital bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 571

You deserved it 198

Health risk

By Anonymous - 12/10/2022 08:00 - Belgium

Today, the sciatic nerve in my left leg started twinging at random moments, leaving that leg painful and useless for a few seconds each time. Yesterday, I twisted my right knee and ankle falling over at work. Standing up is terrifying and I don't know which leg to limp on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 892

You deserved it 98

emeraldisle 30

Wednesday 19 December 2012 16:01

It may seem mean to you but maybe he's trying to make you laugh and feel better. I know it would work on me.

olpally 32

Wednesday 19 December 2012 16:01

Awww, that's cute. Give him credit for having a sense of humor about your injury/condition and trying to cheer you up. he's a funny one. Lol :)

Comments

isamisis 9

Wednesday 19 December 2012 16:46

I bet you can get him to do a lot for you in your condition. After all, you are the master.

OfficeNinja 5

Wednesday 19 December 2012 16:48

I call my wife's stiff walk when she is having arthritis the "zombie shuffle". Now she calls it the zombie shuffle too.

Sputnikspak 13

Wednesday 19 December 2012 17:30

I can't let my partner see this. I have Lupus, and have some really arthritic days. I do not want to be told I have a 'zombie shuffle'. ...Because I'm fine with 'It's a werewolf day' instead.

maz95 17

Wednesday 19 December 2012 17:20

He seems like a pretty cool and funny fiancé to me :)

Sputnikspak 13

Wednesday 19 December 2012 17:28

I'm quite certain that's exactly what the OP's fiancé is referencing...

russfml 31

Wednesday 19 December 2012 17:29

Fyl but that is hilarious!! Once this has passed I'm sure the two of you will laugh at it.

slimjim8094 12

Wednesday 19 December 2012 17:32

What hump?

voncrane 23

Wednesday 19 December 2012 17:37

I can relate to that and know exactly how you feel OP.. Once had a case of nasty abscess under both armpits for over a year.. Terrible discomfort all day long..