Animals: Today, I heard my asshole neighbor had died of a stroke. I was...

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 08:25 - United States

Today, I heard my asshole neighbor had died of a stroke. I was outside and said, "Well it's about goddamn time!" I turned around to see his wife walking her dog and staring deep into my soul. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 120

You deserved it 68 246

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Same thing different taste

By Jedi2500 - 15/02/2012 23:53 - United States

Today, as I was leaving for work, I discovered my neighbor had just passed away. I found out when I came across his body lying in my front yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 451

You deserved it 2 164

By Anonymous - 06/02/2012 10:38 - United States

Today, my downstairs neighbor died. I knew because the smell wafted up to my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 078

You deserved it 2 649

By unknown52 - 02/12/2011 02:02 - Netherlands

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 814

You deserved it 3 775

By Oops - 02/11/2009 01:43 - United States

Today, I was at a party and saw an old friend from college. I went up to her asking how she was and how her family was. She went on to tell me that her husband left her a month ago and started crying. I told her that he was an ass anyway and that she didn't need him. Turns out he died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 626

You deserved it 14 943

Amityville

By bumpinthenight - 20/04/2020 08:00

Today, I was painting my new house when my neighbor introduced himself. Mid-conversation, he said, "The lady who lived here was nice, but just couldn't get over her husband hanging himself in the garage. Or her son shooting himself in the basement." I'll never sleep again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 998

You deserved it 354

Unrequited callousness

By Anonymous - 07/02/2022 04:01

Today, I heard that my crush’s dog had died. For some reason, my first instinct when I saw him was to say, “Oh my god, I heard that your dog died!” He started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377

You deserved it 801

By Matti - 17/08/2018 22:00

Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 193

You deserved it 241

Don't mind me

By Anonymous - 16/04/2012 12:38 - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 012

You deserved it 3 396

By CoolStoryBro - 29/03/2013 08:23

Today, while I was at work, I was on the verge of tears. My coworker asked what was wrong and I explained that I recently had to put my dog down. He then replied, "Cool story, bro. Tell it again." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 841

You deserved it 3 593

By Anonymous - 24/01/2011 05:40 - Egypt

Today, I woke up, patted my dog and kissed his nose. He was dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 680

You deserved it 4 334

ctlnaaia71 8

Monday 10 January 2011 16:04

you r a f*cking asshole.

Frickmetinajenks 0

Monday 10 January 2011 16:12

I hope people say that abput you when YOU die. That's a shitty thing to say. YDI.

Comments

Shorty_Shaza 5

Monday 10 January 2011 17:44

oh my days what the hell is wrong with my phone connection??! Sorry for the repetition of my posts :S

KessyKandi 0

Monday 10 January 2011 17:57

Don't joke about death! It's horrible, and makes you look like an asshole

gfncute 0

Monday 10 January 2011 18:13

bwahahaaaa this is the best post ever

DakotaCat 4

Monday 10 January 2011 18:20

Take a look inside yourself, a black wretched old heart is all you'll see..

3p1c_fml 1

Monday 10 January 2011 18:23

Looks to me as if... (puts on sunglasses) ...you need a soul, man

iftheglovefits 0

Monday 10 January 2011 22:40

LOL!!! love that! I like you're creative comment!

alicec123 0

Monday 10 January 2011 18:26

nobody deserves to die - not even assholes.

Tuesdays76 0

Monday 28 March 2011 6:08

Murderers deserve to die.

seannymulvs 0

Monday 10 January 2011 18:38

He probably deserved it.

newgfour 0

Monday 10 January 2011 18:41

YOU ARE AN ASS HOLE BASTARD DIRTY FILTHY PIECE OF SHIT!! kbye:-)

Leetswaglordmaybe2 9

Monday 10 January 2011 18:49

don't speak ill of the dead is a stupid idea. if you were despised by everyone during life, chances are being dead doesn't compensate it. one word = Hitler. in other words: OP you're awesome, although a bit of an ass yourself.