Miscellaneous: Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured... - FML

By Kyle - 05/01/2012 06:58 - United States

Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured milk all over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 918

You deserved it 35 962

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Backfire

By Anonymous - 14/07/2012 20:10 - Nigeria - Lagos

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 175

You deserved it 54 763

By squeltorey - 03/08/2012 19:28 - United States - Whittier

Today, after waking up, I went into the kitchen and took a swig of milk from the carton. I overestimated my strength, and the whole thing splashed all over my face. A few moments later, my dad staggered in, looked at me in disgust, and said, "You know what? I don't even wanna know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 821

You deserved it 11 172

By ZeroApostle4Ever - 23/02/2012 08:00 - United States

Today, my dad threw a waffle at my face for his own amusement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 078

You deserved it 6 604

Gotcha good

By fuck you, dad - 08/02/2014 20:54 - United States - Bellflower

Today, my family and I were celebrating my dad's birthday. The two of us were standing by the pool chatting, and I jokingly said "You're old now." I suppose I should have expected him to shove me into the pool, my phone still in hand, and retort, "You're soaked now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 829

You deserved it 18 666

By rowie1311 - 27/03/2011 18:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 586

You deserved it 31 059

Just a prank, son!

By barface - 11/01/2012 02:52 - United States

Today, while very sick, throwing up in a bucket beside my bed, my dad came in pushed my face into the bucket. For a laugh, apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 852

You deserved it 2 812

By paige - 01/04/2011 03:18 - United States

Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 727

You deserved it 5 789

By not gay in AL - 11/05/2014 17:57 - United States

Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I loved him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 389

You deserved it 5 486

By Anonymous - 17/10/2010 06:28 - United States

Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of those big erasers that say, "FOR BIG MISTAKES." He opened it, tried to erase me with it, then said, "It doesn't work." and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 120

You deserved it 30 390

By Anonymous - 15/05/2015 23:55 - United States

Today, I came home to find my dad drinking. Trying to be cheerful, I greeted him with a "Hi, dad!" He sighed, shook his head, and said "It hurts me when you call me that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 747

You deserved it 2 380

Next

Top comments

chili10 18

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:06

What a sweet father/son relationship.

Give_Linux_A_Go 28

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:17

He poured milk all over his son? Such actions are, in my opinion, legendairy.

Comments

ellysellyse 4

Thursday 5 January 2012 13:16

he should drink that milk to keep his old frail bones strong

MigraineurOfLife 15

Thursday 5 January 2012 13:16

Don't dish it if you can't take it!

thiscrazything 1

Thursday 5 January 2012 13:23

Should have thrown your pop tarts back at him, and had a good old family food fight.

KnucklesDeep 5

Thursday 5 January 2012 13:23

It's your bad luck for having such a petulant little manchild for a father. i would hope you retaliated in some fashion rather than just take it like a bitch.

MikeMikeTheAzn 3

Thursday 5 January 2012 13:30

Got milk?

pittpsu75 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 13:33

"oh you think I'm old? Here see if this milk is old."

old09 11

Thursday 5 January 2012 14:01

Dad_1 : Kyle_0

illoveyouu435 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 14:06

Next time he wants to know if you've done your homework, throw your OJ at him and tell him to GTFO. Let's see how that goes down.

wonder19 9

Thursday 5 January 2012 14:11

He was just reminding you of when you were a infant!!! Have some MILK!!!

HiddenMonkey 8

Thursday 5 January 2012 14:16

My brother's name is Kyle. That sounds like something my dad would do actually.

1
2
3
4
5
6
7

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Snow Weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I was denied food stamp assistance. Apparently, you need to work 20 hours a week while being a full time student to qualify or have a work study. I was recently suspended from my work study for calling off because my aunt died, and if I worked 20 hours a week, why would I need food stamps? FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 150

You deserved it 5 868

Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83 551

You deserved it 7 856

The Top

Today, my boss sent me to remove a tree from a client's home. So I went and cut down the tree, only for my boss to show up an hour later, speechless. I was supposed to remove a sapling that had sprouted through the driveway tarmac, not the 100-year-old prizewinning Japanese cherry tree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 366

You deserved it 3 472

Today, I was taking some clothes downstairs to wash, when my mum stopped me. She accused me of sleeping around and trying to hide something, since she did the washing yesterday. She made me admit in front of the whole family that I'd been "surprised" by a case of diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 121

You deserved it 3 131

Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 032

You deserved it 3 468

Today, my grandma saw me putting some mints in my mouth when she walked by my room. Instead of confronting me, she told my dad I was doing drugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 714

You deserved it 1 299

Today, my step-sister told me that she was getting married to her girlfriend next summer. At a big family brunch, I made a toast to their marriage. I didn't know that my step-mom didn't know they were dating in the first place, or that she was severely homophobic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 416

You deserved it 4 827

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 143

You deserved it 8 543