Intimacy: Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims... - FML

By Anonymous - 20/11/2013 03:42 - United States - Brooklyn

Spicy

Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 788

You deserved it 71 846

Black Friday: Sales and crazy situations
Shopping stories where discounts aren't the only surprises! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

To boldly go where no man has gone before

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Boston

Spicy

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 207

You deserved it 6 038

Blown job

By Noname - 12/03/2009 09:30 - New Zealand

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 953

You deserved it 339 263

By Eganstein - 24/11/2012 23:11 - United States - Denver

Today, my girlfriend came over to a family game night. Halfway through a game of Klingon Monopoly, my drunk parents started arguing because apparently, while my dad was in jail, he cheated on my mom with a Klingon whore. I doubt my girlfriend will ever visit again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 935

You deserved it 2 726

Beam me up!

By saynotochrispine - 28/07/2009 04:15 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me that we could try living out one of his fantasies. When I showed up ready to go, he began playing the theme song to Star Trek and asked me to call him Mr. Spock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 312

You deserved it 7 959

References

By Anonymous - 31/07/2023 06:00

Today, I was talking to a smokin' hot Cuban sorority girl. She told me her mom only speaks Spanish, so she translates for her. Without thinking I said, "Oh like Chewbacca and Han Solo?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 994

By Anonymous - 19/04/2013 05:14 - Canada - Clairmont

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I attempted sexting for the first time. After about twenty minutes of Star Wars references, I gave up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 910

You deserved it 10 267

The Force

By RobinBunny713 - 19/07/2011 03:23 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 802

You deserved it 34 375

Let me Slytherin

By Wisconsin love - 13/12/2010 17:35 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 997

You deserved it 10 971

By Anonymous - 10/02/2015 14:51 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, a cute girl was telling me about her weird fetishes. I jokingly said, "Remind me never to have sex with you". She replied, "Don't worry, I have standards". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 494

You deserved it 20 913

By NOKHAN - 25/10/2013 17:17 - United States - Durham

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I watched Star Trek Into Darkness together. He liked it so much that he's now chosen to yell "KHAAANNNNN!" as he cums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 111

You deserved it 7 252

Next

Top comments

starw0lf 31

Wednesday 20 November 2013 11:56

Maybe she is a Romulan?

BlackPowderMedic 5

Wednesday 20 November 2013 11:58

It seems like nature's way of telling you that you don't quite have enough common sense yet, and maybe ought not reproduce.

Comments

emmanuelwade 9

Sunday 25 May 2014 3:44

Hahahahhahahahahhahahaha

IDK_anymore 3

Friday 13 June 2014 12:17

What kind of girl would NOT want to speak Klingon during sex? I once started speaking Klingon in French Class by accident, and I'm a 16 year old girl.

Makifun 19

Thursday 26 June 2014 9:49

*sigh*(_ _)

dancer571998 1

Tuesday 8 July 2014 5:26

I would be OK with it!!!!! totally OK!!!!!!

UmmOkThen 31

Wednesday 5 November 2014 6:21

She's just a "P'tack"

ughnotthatgirl 9

Thursday 4 December 2014 5:03

That might be a little much, OP... Even as a nerd myself I would probably not appreciate it, kills the mood. Try again later, maybe.

azarel88 11

Tuesday 3 February 2015 5:06

your one chance and you blew it.

greeneyedx 23

Thursday 9 April 2015 5:28

OP, that'd be awesome.

Klwulffy 14

Thursday 16 April 2015 6:25

Oh Jesus I would have sex with you in an instant. I wish my boyfriend knew Klingon ❤️❤️

phazetryhard 10

Wednesday 27 May 2015 20:44

Romulan Scum

12
13
14
15
16

Keywords

Weird Underwear Miscellaneous Clothes Halloween Cute Dogs Animals Awkward Fire First Dates Smells Love Work Scary Phobias Kids Shopping Embarrassing Therapy Mental health Health Friends Am I overreacting? AITA Birthday Poopoo peepee Thief Customers TV shows

The Top

Today, I learned that my friend had parties all summer without me. I wasn't even invited once. Why ? Because I didn't send a message. My bad, I didn't know I could've have sent a message to attend parties I didn't know were happening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 608

You deserved it 162

Here's the latest video from our friends at 10secondtraumas.com, enjoy! Kay Akana, co-founder of 10secondtraumas.com, is also a stand-up comedian in LA. Do go and check out her performances, she did manage to make us lot laugh! ...

I agree, your life sucks 5

You deserved it 32

The Top

Today, I told my mother that I'm pregnant. She went off screaming at me about how I shouldn't be having sex. I am 25 and have been happily married for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 863

You deserved it 2 440

Today, my Halloween costume finally showed up in the mail. Their consolation for a late delivery? A 50 cent discount. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 065

You deserved it 2 810

Today, I went to a job interview and had a brilliant answer prepared for a common job interview question, but as soon as the interviewer asked what my main qualities were, my mind went blank and I blurted out, "I like turtles." FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 283

Today, at age eighteen, I finished moving out of my parents' house and into my own. The only person to even remotely give a shit was my sister, and that was only because I was taking the cat with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 261

You deserved it 2 367

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and I noticed the balcony door was open. As I went to go close it, I swear I saw my cat wondering outside and I panicked. Long story short, I locked myself out searching for the cat and the next thing I knew, he was meowing at me from the balcony a few feet above me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 308

You deserved it 185

Today, I decided to get dressed up for school because it's my birthday. I was heading to class in my heels. Then, I rolled my ankle, fell down the muddy hill, pulled a leg muscle, and scratched up my knees. At least ten people saw it. I was wearing a white skirt. Happy Birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 131

You deserved it 15 157