Animals: Today, I learned that when you piss on a hornets' nest from a...

By freakfreak12345 - 19/07/2011 16:41 - United States

Today, I learned that when you piss on a hornets' nest from a window, the hornets will go after the source of the stream. It can also cause you to fall through your friend's second story window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 640

You deserved it 74 794

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Same thing different taste

By sisi9999 - 25/07/2011 04:14 - United States

Today, I learned that I'm allergic to hornets. I also learned that when your mom sprays a hornets' nest, and they come after you, that jumping in the pool doesn't help. They hover and wait for you to surface. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 994

You deserved it 3 592

Invasion

By Anonymous - 26/08/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, I went to clean my roof when something buzzed by my head and a sting hit my neck. It turns out there's a small nest of, like, five hornets just chilling outside of my window. I found a dead one on the desk in my bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 248

You deserved it 127

By Anonymous - 02/04/2012 02:25 - United States - Binghamton

Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 950

You deserved it 3 440

By Anonymous - 26/06/2013 17:51 - United States - State College

Today, I was going to set up my air conditioner in the window. As I opened up the window, I must have disturbed a wasp nest, because a dozen wasps flew in and several of them stung me. The rest are now somewhere in my house with my terrified girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 919

You deserved it 4 100

Heavenly Shower

By deadgrass - 29/03/2012 00:44 - United States - Middletown

Today, I discovered that the stream of water that periodically falls onto the ground outside my apartment window isn't actually water. The guy above me regularly pees out of his window onto his balcony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 703

You deserved it 1 947

By Anonymous - 05/09/2015 08:39 - United Kingdom

Today, while using a portable restroom at the park, I discovered all too late that some very hostile and territorial hornets had made it their home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 371

You deserved it 1 739

By Asshole hornet - 28/10/2013 20:18 - United States - Marblehead

Today, a hornet thought it would be fun to fly into a candle that I had lit. As the hornet burned to death, it flung its charred body at my face, which is more painful than it sounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 379

You deserved it 3 503

By BearGrillz - 17/08/2009 23:40 - United States

Today, there were some wasps getting in my bedroom from a hole in the frame of my window. I went outside with some spray and took out their entrance. What I didnt know is that when you spray wasps, they go the other direction. I now have 60+ wasps flying around my bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 319

You deserved it 25 989

Your brain on alcohol

By michael - 17/07/2019 12:07

Today, I found out that getting drunk and attempting to shit out the second story window is a very bad idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 495

You deserved it 2 924

By someone euthanize me - 16/01/2016 08:17

Today, I tested out my new paintball gun by firing a few rounds into some thick bushes. Nothing could've prepared me for the angry swarm of hornets whose nest I'd apparently shot. I'm in so much pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 879

You deserved it 8 044

Mi24hind 0

Tuesday 19 July 2011 22:28

YDI for peeing on the hornets. what did they do to you?

KaptainKronicX 5

Tuesday 19 July 2011 22:36

They must have been pissed. ;)

Comments

chonchogonzalez 2

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:14

it is people like you who should not be allowed to pass on their dumbass genes

ohcrapitscurtis 8

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:15

Another one bites the dust to Social Darwinism.

hogs3212 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:16

just look on the bright side- no need to waste ur money on fire&ice lube.... u got it free!

mitchell137 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:25

I hope it stung the dick out of you! Lol

rachilio 26

Wednesday 20 July 2011 20:53

probably did :D

danishbagel 3

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:27

Talk about having nothing better to do..

alvarny 17

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:30

Thanks for finding out so that I don't have to. it sounded like a safe thing to do but I guess not.

alvarny 17

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:30

Thanks for finding out so that I don't have to. it sounded like a safe thing to do but I guess not.

gdcoll01 2

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:37

were u hi

missy1228 2

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:39

sooo I guess toilets are to mainstrem. now aren't they?

brownie101 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 4:41

YDI for doing something stupid

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The Top

Today, I've spent nearly three weeks indulging my boyfriend's weird fetish, where he wears a hockey mask and I call him Jason. He just confessed it isn't really a fetish for him and that was just fucking with me. He's already told all his friends. I'm humiliated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 245

You deserved it 4 765

Today, my laptop was slow so I used my husband’s laptop. I went to the bedroom and found it opened, so I moved the trackpad and it powered on. The first thing I see is a page with redhead porn, and another tab with nude redheads. You know who else is a redhead? The new girl at his job he tells me not to worry about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 132

The Top

Today, my mom invited my asshole cousin to my daughter's 10th birthday party, saying that this is the best time for me to apologize for having him imprisoned 3 years ago. He’s the same cousin who held my daughter hostage after the cops cornered him in a drug bust. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 191

You deserved it 277

Today, I was at my boyfriend's in a back room that wasn’t connected to the main house. I really had to pee, but neither of us wanted to go into the house, so he told me to just go outside in a cup. I ended up having diarrhea in a cup in my boyfriend's backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 357

You deserved it 4 608

Today, my mom was criticizing how I can't handle taking care of any living thing because I'm too irresponsible. We had a huge argument so I went back to my apartment, only to find that my fish had died. I forgot I had a fish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 738

You deserved it 60 944

Today, I got locked in my boyfriend's garage in my underwear while his parents ripped him a new one for having sex beneath their roof. His sister had to let me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 560

You deserved it 5 052

Today, I was helping a friend move. Before we arrived, he put his key on my key ring to keep it safe. When we got there, he promptly shoved my front door key into the lock and snapped it clean off. Not only can we not get into his house, but now I can't get back into mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 892

You deserved it 4 093

Today, after spending the night with my girlfriend for the first time, I discovered why she would always want to rush home after dinner dates. Her stomach gurgles so loudly after eating, I can hear it in the next room over, with the TV on. This apparently happens no matter what she eats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 852

You deserved it 142

Same thing different taste

Invasion

Heavenly Shower

Your brain on alcohol

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