Well, at least it sounds like you were a good pet owner.

But a pet crow is kinda cool as ****...

Time to adopt!!

Call Audubon for some advice, they rescue and raise baby birds by the thousands

Put out some uncooked rice problem solved

You say baby crow, how young are we talking here? It varies widely on species, but birds imprint on what feeds them as a chick, they then identify themselves the same as what fed them, birds that are hand reared by humans think that humans and themselves are the same species. Did you 'kick it out of the nest' at the correct age as its parents would in the wild? If you keep them too long then they don't mature properly and think that you (The parent) will look after them and feed them forever and will vocalize for food even if they are more than capable of getting it themselves. I'm not a crow 'specialist', I'm more of a bird of prey specialist so I'm just going from what I know with Owls, Hawks and Falcons etc. Anyway chances are you've landed yourself a pet crow, trying to force it to live somewhere else won't work, it'll either starve or find its way back home as crows are intelligent enough for that.

But it IS the best idea because now you have a freaking CROW as a pet! Do you have any idea how jealous I am right now?!

Just dont feed it anymore, it will soon leave, as it will have to eat to survive.

It would be cool to have a pet crow. People who come over would instantly get nervous n be like oh shit she's a witch. At least you wouldn't have very many break ins

A lot of people have commented on how intelligent crows are, but they are also extremely social. As someone else has pointed out, like many birds they identify their caregiver as their parent from a young age, even if said caregiver is not a crow. In this case, the crow has identified OP as its parent and they house as its home. The best chance OP has to get it to leave without have to resort to letting it starve on their front porch is to try and take it to an area where a group of the same species of crows can be found. If there are none near OP's house, the crow has no reason to leave, as it doesn't know of any other social group it could move to. Hopefully, by taking it near conspecifics, it will be able to vocalize with them and join the group, where it would quickly learn how to feed itself properly. Ideally, OP should try and take it to the area where they found it in the first place. Its native group might still be there. If that fails then, as others have already said, OP could always take it to a vet or bird specialists.