Miscellaneous: Today, I left the iron and ironing board in my room. While I...

By healey16 - 03/04/2009 18:13 - Canada

Today, I left the iron and ironing board in my room. While I was at school, my mom decided to do some ironing, and did it in my room for convenience. The iron needed water, so she took a water bottle from my dresser and poured it in. It was my secret vodka stash, and the iron caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 701

You deserved it 78 900

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Same thing different taste

By zazzleface - 09/04/2012 12:23 - United States - Bergenfield

Today, my mom was in the kitchen when her shirt caught on fire. Acting quickly, I poured my glass of water on her. Instead of thanking me, she yelled at me for making a mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 289

You deserved it 2 375

By Magicgwen - 26/04/2012 20:45 - France - Paris

Today, I put my ironing board away in the bathroom. After closing the door, I heard a loud noise. The board had opened up while falling over, taking up the width of the room. I can't open the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 706

You deserved it 3 798

By kutekittykatz - 10/07/2013 08:58 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, while ironing some shirts, my cat decided to hop up and investigate. To prevent him from burning himself, I instinctively moved the iron away and placed it flat on my other hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 260

You deserved it 14 595

Gordon Ramsey called, you're an idiot sandwich

By Anonymous - 30/04/2020 23:00

Today, I tried to make breakfast. I had everything cooking on the stove when I reached to turn on the faucet, only to find out that the head of the faucet was up the sleeve of my robe. After drying off, I went to serve my boyfriend his plate, but when I returned, the stove had caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 422

You deserved it 558

By Louis - 15/11/2018 13:00 - South Africa

Today, I decided to be healthy and drink a tall glass of water whilst doing my assignment that is due in three days. I managed to spill the entire glass over my laptop. I flipped it over and used a hairdryer to dry it off. While doing that, I managed to melt my keyboard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 691

You deserved it 2 979

By cantcloselegs - 20/10/2013 12:39 - United States

Today, I was using my new curling iron to curl my hair. I was sitting down. Suddenly I dropped the iron and, as a reflex, I caught it between my bare thighs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 840

You deserved it 6 168

By Anonymous - 01/08/2011 04:28 - United States

Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 158

You deserved it 5 786

Testing, testing

By BubbaYoshi117 - 07/01/2020 20:00 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I was refilling my lighter. Afterwards, I gave it a test light. I must've spilled some fluid because my thumb caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 430

You deserved it 1 279

By Anonymous - 07/11/2013 17:12 - Ireland

Today, I was pouring boiling water into a cup, and I accidentally spilled it all over my hand. My mother responded by slapping me for getting water everywhere. My hand is scorched red, but thanks, I love you too, mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 682

You deserved it 4 047

By chinesef000d - 29/08/2009 05:38 - United States

Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 962

You deserved it 3 200

omg_18 0

Friday 3 April 2009 23:12

not so secret if it was sitting on your dresser now was it. fail.

Zerenade 0

Friday 3 April 2009 23:12

Wow, what a waste of a tasty beverage.

Comments

DankJemo 0

Monday 6 April 2009 14:56

Psh, maybe that will teach her... Your mom shouldn't be pouring random liquids she finds in a teenagers room into something that can combust.

FlightlessTalk 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 1:09

Couldn't have been that secret, if she found it. Find a better hiding spot.

peacevitalove 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 1:31

maybe you shouldnt have a vodka stash.. thats not healthy at all.

SurpriseButtseks 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 22:07

I'm with #77. You all sound ignorant.

InsomPsycho 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 12:42

hahahaha awesome.

cmullan672 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:37

liar....vodka isnt flamable unless it is below 0 degrees celcius fail

racer_fml 0

Monday 13 April 2009 2:39

I agree who those that said that your mother is stupid. She actually violated one of the very first rules that parents teach us "do not assume that any clear liquid is water". I also assume that she tried to blame your for her stupidity and that's why you ended up in FML. We can also see that you are stupid as well, judging on where you hide your stuff from your parents. Having said that I have no other option but to agree that your life is f***ed.

skatrwannabe3 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 17:37

#59 needs to stop preaching. This site was made for ragging on idiots and showing pity for those who were genuinely ****** by life. Go take you morals somewhere else, like Myspace bullitens or some shit. And anyone calling BS on this story is absolutly correct. 140 proof/57% alchohol is the danger zone for flaming up AND you'd need an actual spark. Besides, if you were holding onto that vodka to take it out drinking and save someone a few bucks (for anyone who has a problem with drinking at the house, cause we have to be politically correct by society's standards on a site built for speaking your mind in a consequence-free environment) then you really should have at least put it in your dresser. Hopefully, that would make everyone stop bitching about finding vodka in the underwear drawer, too. Try putting a lock on your door, like any other self-respecting underage drunk would. That's how I do it =)