Miscellaneous: Today, I'm in the hospital because I sliced my leg open. Why?...

By Anonymous - 31/01/2010 18:37 - United States

Today, I'm in the hospital because I sliced my leg open. Why? I jumped off my bed and scratched myself on the metal bed frame when Miss America was crowned to Miss Virginia. I'm 20 years old, and a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 462

You deserved it 34 585

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Arielle - 31/01/2012 11:07 - Australia

Today, I went to the hospital emergency room to visit my boyfriend who had badly sliced his leg open. It ended with me being admitted with a possible head trauma, after hitting my head on the wall and floor as I collapsed at the sight of his wound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 593

You deserved it 4 398

By Anonymous - 02/03/2018 19:30 - United States

Today, I woke up after being sick from the flu and tried to get out of bed. I forgot I was in a bunk bed and broke my ankle in the fall down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 336

You deserved it 856

By tessisue - 04/01/2016 11:18 - Germany

Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut in his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 876

You deserved it 2 226

Not my day, is it?

By ouch. - 10/12/2018 09:30 - United States - Stamford

Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 733

You deserved it 347

That escalated quickly

By marrying this man - 10/10/2023 07:30

Today, I broke my boyfriend's nose trying to pop his blackheads. His leg jerked in shock, kicked my leg, and I fell, breaking the mirror, cutting myself, and slamming into the bathroom sink. I woke up in the hospital, with over a hundred stitches, and my poor boyfriend in jail for suspected domestic abuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 283

By Anonymous - 06/01/2011 07:35

Today, I was at the doctor's getting some skin scraped off the bottom of my foot for some tests. As soon as the doctor grabbed my foot, it tickled and I accidentally kicked him in the face. During this, the blade sliced my foot open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 969

You deserved it 10 341

By Anonymous - 23/11/2014 00:10 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I decided to conquer my fear of blades, and tried shaving my legs with a razor. I sat on the side of my bathtub and wet my legs, but some of the water splashed. I slipped on it and fell back, hitting my head on the tile wall and slicing my leg open at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 155

You deserved it 5 988

By 282 - 29/10/2018 14:00

Today, I was sitting on my younger sister's bed while I was on my phone. She came in the room and pushed me off the bed, and I ended up slicing the skin under my eye. Now, my parents are forcing me to pay for the injury for "hanging off the bed". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 730

You deserved it 343

By Anonymous - 28/10/2009 08:03 - United States

Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 180

You deserved it 7 947

You're grounded!

By Break A Leg - 08/08/2022 14:00

Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 762

You deserved it 138

lil_lucy23 0

Monday 1 February 2010 1:17

is this your "coming out" post? if so, congratulations! :)

studentwoes 2

Monday 1 February 2010 1:59

I will never understand why so many people who post on FML feel the need to write just awkward sentences. Why not just write "when Miss Virginia was crowned Miss America"?

Comments

omey123 0

Monday 1 February 2010 2:24

Fail

penisinyourmouf 0

Monday 1 February 2010 2:25

how the fuckk is he gay hes watchen girls thats straight u dumb fuckkers

boatkicker 4

Monday 1 February 2010 2:25

How on earth did you pull that off. Frames that are meant to be exposed usually have edges that aren't sharp. Maybe they'll cut you if hit one weird, but not bad enough to warrant going to the hospital. Frames that aren't meant to be exposed often have sharp edges, but they are meant to be under the bed, where you can't cut yourself. BTW, no one cares that you're a man and got over-excited about Miss America, and the few who do care, don't care that you're 20. It would have the same effect if you were 15, or 40.

redbluegreen 40

Monday 1 February 2010 4:25

I actually ripped my knee open on a metal bed frame as a kid and had to get stitches, so it is very possible. And I wasn't even jumping or falling, I just was crawling around on the floor.

toeray 0

Monday 1 February 2010 2:28

10 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and broke his head, the mama called the doctor and the doctor said, NO MOTE MONKEYS JUMPING ON THE BED!

CyclonePsycho 1

Monday 1 February 2010 5:16

Nine monkeys jumpin' on the bed! One fell off and bumped his head! The mama called the doctor and the doctor said "NO MORE MONKEYS JUMPIN' ON THE BED!"