Holidays: Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend. Going through Chinese...

By notthatkinkyanyway - 13/11/2011 12:46 - China

Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend. Going through Chinese customs, an officer pulled us aside, removed a suspicious metal object from my boyfriend's luggage and called six other officers to have a look. It was a kinky pair of handcuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 539

You deserved it 6 398

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

You're under arrest

By poo_shoe123 - 31/03/2009 20:47 - United States

Today, I was called by my 9 year old son's teacher. He had handcuffed himself to his desk with handcuffs he found in my room. I was told to please bring in the key and not to leave my kinky toys out where a child could get them. I'm a cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107 621

You deserved it 10 233

By well then... - 15/06/2013 05:04 - Canada - London

Today, as I was crossing to the US, I got pulled over by border patrol for looking "suspicious". The female cop searched my purse and found a condom. She smirked and said, "I doubt you'd ever need that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 422

You deserved it 4 790

Hands on the wheel

By Username - 05/10/2011 00:02 - United States

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 967

You deserved it 12 664

By thebickster - 06/03/2009 17:58 - United States

Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 572

You deserved it 49 770

By dangerousknitter - 08/10/2009 00:38 - United States

Today, in the middle of an exam, I was escorted out by the campus police due to suspicion of a concealed weapon. The officers couldn't stop laughing for 20 minutes when they found out the weapon was metal knitting needles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 320

You deserved it 3 849

By madison77 - 21/11/2011 23:26 - United States

Today, my engagement ring was seized by the police, and my fiancé was arrested on larceny charges. Both in the same visit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 507

You deserved it 3 059

Suspicious

By BilletsDoudous - 15/01/2015 06:51 - France

Today, I was working as a ticket inspector on a train. A suspiciously-acting thirty something guy got on board with two huge bags. Worried, I kept an eye on him. I wasn't disappointed when he got 5 furry toys out of his bags and started to have a conversation with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 458

You deserved it 3 405

Memories

By exasperated - 17/04/2014 03:14 - United States - Houston

Today, I got a call from the police that my house had been burglarized, but an off-duty cop caught the criminal. I pull up to see my detained, psycho ex-boyfriend sheepishly grinning at me. He had three of my lace panties and two of my bras, claiming it was "all for memories' sake". FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 190

You deserved it 4 621

By Anonymous - 27/11/2013 17:51 - United States - Poquoson

Today, I was visiting a family member at a women's prison. The staff wanted to search me, basically claiming that my breasts looked suspiciously disproportionate, implying I was smuggling something in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 390

You deserved it 4 235

By Anonymous - 22/09/2009 23:36 - Canada

Today, I was checking into a hotel with my boyfriend. A few minutes after we get to our room, the cops show up to our door asking to see some ID from the both of us. The hotel staff had called the cops on us because they thought I was underage and he was going to molest me. I'm 21 and he is 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 024

You deserved it 3 206

DDpandaz 0

Sunday 13 November 2011 19:11

Giggity

Analtality 4

Sunday 13 November 2011 19:11

Imagine what they did if they confiscated it.

Comments

th4m4ster 6

Sunday 13 November 2011 19:29

kinky vacations eh

ilovevegas106 2

Sunday 13 November 2011 19:31

LOL

Emilycatherine 0

Sunday 13 November 2011 19:33

Atleast y'all were prepared for that arrest(;

flockz 19

Sunday 13 November 2011 19:35

*thumbs up* ahaha good one dude. that flockz guy must be pissed. i wonder whe- OH YOU MOTHER ******!

rattusrattus 18

Sunday 13 November 2011 19:37

Kinky win. You have the rattus seal of approval.

AthleticSwaqq 8

Sunday 13 November 2011 19:37

Um, you're about me says you are from England, so I wouldn't talk about America's laws, or doings if you actually don't know.. Or aren't even from America. So speaking, no they wouldn't lock you up.

ikickgingers 15

Sunday 13 November 2011 19:38

They would have locked them up? Okay... ? I don't think TSA gives a rats ass if you fly with adult toys. Just be nice and remove batteries so they don't get suspicious when your bag starts jack rabbiting all over. Get it? Jack rabbit. Ha ha ha.