Miscellaneous: Today, I opened a window that had been shut for a couple of months....

By spiderbaby - 06/10/2015 19:43 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I opened a window that had been shut for a couple of months. As soon as I did, dozens of tiny baby spiders blew in with the breeze, and dispersed in my kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 539

You deserved it 2 529

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/07/2014 17:45 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I decided to bring down a very old fan from the attic. I plugged it in, and as soon as I turned it on, tiny spiders were blown all over my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 671

You deserved it 18 319

Awwww, how sweet!

By Justin - 25/07/2020 20:00

Today, after having a 3-day vacation and feeling a bit bummed that it was over, I got home to find a black widow watching her babies hatch in my office window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 411

You deserved it 145

By JustLeaveThem - 25/01/2017 18:00

Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 739

You deserved it 292

Sorry, dude

By Aussie mate - 24/09/2020 08:01 - Australia

Today, I got up and started getting ready for work. As I entered the bathroom, I noticed a moth in the shower. Feeling generous, I caught the moth in a cup and took it to the front porch. I released the moth and watched it fly away… into a giant spider and its web. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 231

By Anonymous - 26/06/2013 17:51 - United States - State College

Today, I was going to set up my air conditioner in the window. As I opened up the window, I must have disturbed a wasp nest, because a dozen wasps flew in and several of them stung me. The rest are now somewhere in my house with my terrified girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 921

You deserved it 4 101

By aliqi - 12/05/2012 20:48 - United States

Today, I noticed a little white ball in the corner of my bedroom ceiling. I guess it had been there for a while already, but the teeming mass of baby spiders crawling out made it a lot more conspicuous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 313

You deserved it 3 422

Collect the set

By Anonymous - 20/04/2022 12:00

Today, some spider must have had babies somewhere in the walls, because every five minutes I seem to find yet another spider on my ceiling, in my cupboards, under the furniture, everywhere. I’m so fed up of smashing them, I’m thinking of getting the house fumigated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 768

You deserved it 140

Freaked

By AussieGirl - 21/11/2009 11:40 - Australia

Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 180

You deserved it 4 028

No good deed…

By oops - 04/12/2009 17:23 - United States

Today, I saw a moth trapped in a spider web. Feeling gracious, I gently freed it, and then took it to the window to let it out. When I opened the window to set him free, my $300 air conditioner fell two stories and smashed on the sidewalk. The moth flew away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 765

You deserved it 36 397

By Anonim23 - 15/08/2019 20:00

Today, the spiders in my house are so big that they catch wasps in their webs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 606

You deserved it 238

SalsaVerdeDonut 22

Wednesday 7 October 2015 1:47

I'll bring the gasoline. You just bring the matches.

MagnusDeus 24

Wednesday 7 October 2015 1:50

Nope

Comments

wildstyle2007 8

Wednesday 7 October 2015 3:22

good thing there's a drought, cause you need to burn that f#cker down!

godzilllla 12

Wednesday 7 October 2015 3:32

Leave. Leave and never come back.

chelseabellsey 15

Wednesday 7 October 2015 3:38

Well shit....

venomousflower 24

Wednesday 7 October 2015 3:41

Burn. The. House. Down. Immediately.

abby1212 27

Wednesday 7 October 2015 3:48

Time to burn the house down.

Xx_dankdoge_xX 18

Wednesday 7 October 2015 3:52

Time to call your realtor

fmlperson8264 16

Wednesday 7 October 2015 4:32

I hope they aren't venomous.

ashcat12 9

Wednesday 7 October 2015 4:38

Burn it with fire.

royalyue 7

Wednesday 7 October 2015 4:38

Time to nuke the house.

False_Stupidity 41

Wednesday 7 October 2015 4:41

I say we nuke the site, from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

Keywords

Relatable Shoes Miscellaneous Clothes Transportation Insurance Cars Work Health Cheating Love Food Clumsy Awkward Embarrassing Animals Dating First Dates Bikes Cute Dogs Ironic Pranks Shopping Texting Mistakes Family Fight Birthday Drunk

The Top

Today, I'm so tired of life. I work 16 hour shifts. My fiancee takes me for granted and I mean that seriously, I have to work 16 hours, 5 days a week, come home, take care of the house and the kids, while I listen to her complain about her 40 hour week. No sex and I don't control my money. I hate my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 364

You deserved it 251

Today, I deleted all of my dating apps because apparently something is wrong with me. I've been on 20 different dates this year and nothing has come out of it. I feel like I have the plague and no one wants to be near me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 141

The Top

Today, I was emailing my department about a huge meeting we’re going to have. I was also emailing back and forth with another colleague about office gossip. I absentmindedly replied to the wrong email. I hit reply all to the meeting e-mail, saying that the new supervisor of X department was "so fucking retarded." FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 1 204

Today, I was cuddling on the couch with my girlfriend when I started to tickle her, she asked me to stop but I continued. She had a reaction, and kneed me in the happy sacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 683

You deserved it 66 281

Today, a guy attacked me and tried to steal my bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to my husband screaming in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 665

You deserved it 4 496

Today, while vacuuming my new apartment, I farted a few times. After my last fart, I turned to find my super-hot neighbor standing at the door. Panicking, I asked in a "I-didn't-just-fart-my-ass" tone, "Oh hi! Been standing there for long?" She replied, "Since your initial rip." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 801

You deserved it 6 777

Today, I went out clubbing with a few friends. A cute guy pointed at me from the bar and motioned for me to come over. I was excited and did just that. Turns out he just wanted to ask me if I'd thought about seeing a doctor for my jaundice. No, I just overdid my spray tan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 386

You deserved it 33 130

Today, I had to explain to multiple people that even though I'm white, I have no interest in joining a hate group. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 135

You deserved it 125