Miscellaneous: Today, I pulled out three chips from a bag. There were two round... - FML

By HarryBeast - 10/12/2009 03:24 - Canada

Today, I pulled out three chips from a bag. There were two round ones, and a skinny one, making it look like a penis. I laughed. I'm 33. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 959

You deserved it 32 833

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Same thing different taste

Fact of scratching

By Anonymous - 24/01/2020 14:00

Today, I was eating chips with my father. After I finished eating a chip I felt something between my teeth, It was pubic hair. I soon realized my dad was scratching his testicles while eating chips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 410

You deserved it 307

By Anonymous - 25/06/2010 00:14 - United States

Today, I was eating chips with my father. After I finished eating a chip I felt something between my teeth, It was pubic hair. I soon realized my dad was scratching his testicles while eating chips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97 968

You deserved it 6 544

Subconscious

By doodler - 27/02/2014 11:59 - United States - Hurst

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 098

You deserved it 13 509

By pantyripper - 24/03/2014 12:39 - Australia - Essendon

Today, I ripped my old, worn underwear while trying to pick a wedgie in public. Half ended up in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 312

You deserved it 21 673

By Anonymous - 10/04/2009 21:40 - United States

Today, for the first time ever, a woman saw my penis. I am 30 years old. The woman was my doctor. She snorted to cover a laugh and apologized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313 733

You deserved it 44 058

Do not feed the workers

By Kellz - 20/07/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, at work, I tried to sneakily open a bag of chips I had hidden in my desk drawer. The bag decided to explode as soon as I tore it open, sending chips flying everywhere. My boss chose that exact moment to walk by and saw me on the floor, frantically picking up chips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 169

You deserved it 406

By Username - 16/04/2011 05:14 - United States

Today, I realized that potato chips are made from potatoes. I'm 26. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 153

You deserved it 84 628

By Anonymous - 15/11/2009 23:26 - United States

Today, I had nothing better to do than make a penis out of silly putty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 851

You deserved it 37 756

By ticked - 06/10/2009 13:01 - Pakistan

Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw a crumb on the table in front of me, so without thinking I picked it up and ate it. It wasn't a crumb. It was a tick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 557

You deserved it 47 992

By Otherguy - 18/11/2008 07:36 - France

Today, I was at a restaurant with a girl I like, and as I was getting my wallet out, I dropped a condom. She didn't see anything, and I didn't dare pick it up in case I drew attention to the "object". The waiter walked past, picked up, and held it out to me with a huge grin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 979

You deserved it 9 415

Next

Top comments

mkymkm 0

Thursday 10 December 2009 9:25

cocks are funny whatever age you are :)

pogostick_fml 2

Thursday 10 December 2009 9:22

I don't understand how your life is ****** by this.

Comments

ErikvonDarkmoor 0

Thursday 10 December 2009 23:56

The mods on this site are useless...

TheButler 0

Friday 11 December 2009 0:52

OMG get off this website and start writing english essays! seriousl TOO MANY WORDS!

yummcookie 0

Friday 11 December 2009 1:05

more of an MLIA they always post childish stuff there

thatwhitekid09 0

Friday 11 December 2009 1:30

wow it's not a big deal that's pretty funny

Parthenia 0

Friday 11 December 2009 2:10

Please people, enjoy the updates you get or just ignore them. Better posting fml's some people might like than not posting them at all, why get less if you can have more? I enjoy everything on this site when I'm bored :)

superninja333 1

Friday 11 December 2009 3:01

Lol. That's a good MLIA.

MangeMoi_fml 0

Friday 11 December 2009 3:33

I dont get it.

movies12 0

Friday 11 December 2009 3:48

I thought that was hilarious actually. Who cares if ur 33? what cause u think it's immature, adventually u need to laugh at stupid things. LOL

Tazzabell 0

Friday 11 December 2009 3:56

PUT IT ON MLIA NOT FML STUPID RETARD

FML_IS_FUNNY 0

Friday 11 December 2009 5:21

i wuld die laughin at this.....but den again im extremely immature 4 ma age lmao

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The Top

Today, I had awesome sex with my ex. Again. I broke up with her a few weeks ago as she admittedly hadn't been attracted to me anymore in a long time. Now she says that after we broke up she doesn't feel any pressure anymore, and can enjoy sex with me again like she did before she moved in with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 199

Today, my company told me that they refuse to buy me new safety footwear without a doctor's note, because my shoe size is three sizes smaller than the minimum size my company provides. I actually have to get my doctor to prove my shoe size. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 524

You deserved it 1 300

The Top

Today, I found out that my best friend's mom doesn't wear pyjamas when I got up to go get a glass of water in the middle of the night, at the same time she did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 070

You deserved it 3 430

Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I've been in love with for three years. Her response was to well up, start crying, and ask me why I had to have chosen her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 269

You deserved it 2 890

Today, I was at the airport, about to listen to Disney's Camp Rock soundtrack on my iPhone. I pressed play, only to realize that my headphones weren't plugged in all the way. Everone sitting near me heard Joe Jonas' voice coming from my phone. I am 40 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 123

You deserved it 68 224

Today, I went to a pain specialist to get help with my chronic pain. He did not diagnose anything or discuss causes. He then said, "Good luck with that" as I left. Of course, I still got billed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 428

You deserved it 75

Today, I received a gift certificate from my grandmother for a local bookshop. Considering how broke I am, this would be a fantastic gift. If the bookshop in question wasn't a right-wing evangelical Christian Bookshop, and I wasn't Jewish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 127

You deserved it 3 695

Today, I went on a date with the world's biggest lightweight. She got blind drunk on wine before dessert, and slurred, "You look like... like a black... blueberry." Amused, I said, "You mean a blackberry?" She stared at me for several long seconds, confused, then passed out. Check please. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 374

You deserved it 3 628