Miscellaneous: Today, I ran into a car. I suffered a concussion and broke my... - FML

By munchkin - 26/10/2009 06:35 - France

Today, I ran into a car. I suffered a concussion and broke my nose. I wasn't driving. I walked right into it. It was parked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 851

You deserved it 42 494

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/04/2014 16:01 - United States - Orange

Today, I had my first car crash. I ran into a parked car and the owner saw it happen. I then accidentally opened my door straight into her car as well when I went to give her my information. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 055

You deserved it 11 771

By tracelee - 03/03/2009 09:22 - United States

Today, I hit a parked car. I was walking. To make the scene more embarrassing, the car alarm shocked me and I backed up quickly into the parking meter, knocking me down once more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 526

You deserved it 13 246

Bystander

By Chops - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was walking from my office to the place I had parked my car, a distance of approximately three blocks. As I was about to round the last corner, I was forced to dive out of the way of a speeding car. When I looked up, I noticed that it was my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100 315

You deserved it 4 523

By ttsutaoka - 11/07/2009 07:43 - United States

Today, I was involved in a car accident. I wasn't the driver of either car. I happened to be a passerby that was hit by a falling stop sign as a car hit it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 063

You deserved it 2 786

By A. Person - 07/04/2010 05:36 - Mexico

Today, I was t-boned by a car that sent mine flying into five parked cars. My car was totalled. As the person who hit me pulled me out of the right side of the car he said, "Sorry. I sneezed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 129

You deserved it 2 801

Funny how?

By funnyguyNOT - 05/04/2009 21:39 - United States

Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 306

You deserved it 285 180

By Clumsy Clumsy - 16/04/2016 16:27 - Canada - Spruce Grove

Today, I ran up to my boyfriend to kiss him when he got home from work. I tripped and I fell on him, and he fell backwards. He ended up hitting his head on the sidewalk and had to get stitches. He also had a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 494

You deserved it 3 248

By anon - 21/06/2014 12:50 - United States - Edison

Today, I got hit by a car while walking into the hospital to visit my wife, who had also gotten hit by a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 926

You deserved it 4 860

By Anonymous - 22/09/2011 03:41 - United States

Today, while I was on the bus, my foot fell asleep. When we arrived at my stop, I stood up and limped to the front of the bus. As I walked down the steps, I tripped, fell, and smashed my nose into the ground. The driver just laughed and drove away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 168

You deserved it 3 513

By prettyinpurple - 10/02/2009 04:54 - United States

Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 943

You deserved it 56 308

Next

Top comments

Brittani090270 1

Monday 26 October 2009 16:14

This sounds like something I would do. =)

noshitsherlock 0

Monday 26 October 2009 16:45

wow, you are a special kind of STUPID.

Comments

nuttinick 0

Monday 26 October 2009 17:05

retard.

PoeticPixie 0

Monday 26 October 2009 17:14

I was thinking the exact same thing. Most cars aren't tall enough to hit your face unless you ran into a truck or something, and even then you'd have to run into it pretty hard to break your nose and give yourself a concussion.

natpewpew 0

Monday 26 October 2009 17:29

I have so done this! Although I got a bleeding nose and bruised knees :(

Mx_Rider 6

Monday 26 October 2009 17:42

number 18 how long did it take u to type up all that?

Lokis_Demise 0

Monday 26 October 2009 17:47

Car:1 You: 0 Try it again. I wanna see if you win this time. ;o

andlifesuxagain 0

Monday 26 October 2009 17:53

Way to go Marco Polo

luxornv 0

Monday 26 October 2009 18:16

How the hell do you walk into a car and suffer a concussion and break your nose? I rode my bike into the back of one and only had a split lip. I bet I was going a lot faster than you were too. You're very talented to fail this hard.

PhillyFox 0

Monday 26 October 2009 18:59

You walk into a parked car and get a concussion? Pussy. Look where you're going then.

Aerianna 0

Monday 26 October 2009 19:07

This is where "Yo mommas so stupid she got hit by a parked car" kicks in.

MiniatureMayhem 0

Monday 26 October 2009 20:13

This is a joke I hears before. "You're so stupid you get hit by parked cars."

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Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I wanted to show my friends my cat’s “high-five” trick. I held out my hand, and instead of a high-five, my cat scratched and bit me instead. I yelped, and my friends burst into laughter. I had to bandage my hand, all whilst they joked about “cat training.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 375

Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83 551

You deserved it 7 856

The Top

Today, a friend was making fun of our teacher's car, calling it dorkmobile and saying only idiots would own that car. It's the same as the car I just bought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 094

You deserved it 1 862

Today, at a restaurant, I noticed a really hot girl leaving with her friend. A few minutes later they came back, laughing uncontrollably, and announced that some moron forgot to put on their parking brake and the car was rolling into the full parking lot. It was my car. They watched me chase it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 392

You deserved it 39 736

Today, I realized that the full body wax I got two weeks ago that my wife told me would look sexy doesn't just make me look like a completely hairless ten-year-old boy. The ingrown hairs everywhere now make me look like someone with chicken pox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 201

You deserved it 7 057

Today, my wife of four years confessed to me that she only married me for the money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 3 705

Today, here in Japan, it was announced that we are going into ANOTHER state of emergency, for the fourth time, meaning restaurants, movies, theaters, all will be closed. BUT they will still host the Olympics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 136

You deserved it 129

Today, I let my little sister play a game using my Facebook account. She then accepted all of the people that had sent me a friend request. Among them included my boyfriend's crazy ex, and 3 people I've never met. Now I'm getting strange messages from all of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 272

You deserved it 5 039