Miscellaneous: Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck...

By redneckfamily - 24/05/2013 07:06 - United States - Roy

Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 015

You deserved it 3 681

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Same thing different taste

Farmville

By unwilling redneck - 24/05/2013 22:48 - United States

Today, my uncle drove to my house in his tractor, beer in one hand, and a radio strapped to the dash blasting country music at unimaginable volume. Neither of us live on a farm. Half the neighborhood stood angrily glaring at us until we went inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 520

You deserved it 4 598

By Anonymous - 29/08/2011 13:05 - United States

Today, while having a screaming argument with my son in our front yard, I suddenly realized we are "that white trash family" in the neighborhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 326

You deserved it 41 357

By tikizombie - 31/08/2010 00:04 - Canada

Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 683

You deserved it 50 360

By GEE, THANKS DAD - 28/09/2012 22:21 - United States

Today, my dad forced me to take part in a pathetic act of revenge against our neighbors, who keep parking their 4x4 in front of our house. He made me stand watch while he kept trying to slash their tires. An hour later, we were waiting for my mom to bail us out of jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 415

You deserved it 8 464

By Anonymous - 07/09/2012 22:59 - Australia - Redland Bay

Today, my grandpa was visiting. My neighbors started blasting out rap music, as they've done nearly 24/7 for months, telling me to fuck off when I complain. He went over and screamed he'd gut them like fish if they didn't pipe down. They did. He's 68 and still more intimidating than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 578

You deserved it 5 036

Entitled

By Anonymous - 04/04/2023 22:00

Today, my redneck mother, who I parted ways from years ago, found out I became wealthy in my 30s so she turned up at my house, thinking she could just move in. Then she tried to demand the money I owed for giving birth to me, and camped on my lawn until I called the cops, FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 388

You deserved it 101

Some help

By fuckwank - 20/09/2013 20:31 - United States - Red Oak

Today, I offered to help out at my grandpa's farm, and he had me load buckets of water into his trunk. When he came by and saw me struggling to lift a bucket, he sneered, called me a moron for filling it up before putting it in the truck, and told me to just go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 103

You deserved it 12 450

By overly nationalistic redneck - 19/10/2013 19:37 - Norway - Ytre Arna

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 337

You deserved it 5 319

By Anonymous - 26/12/2012 08:30 - United States - Evergreen

Today, I unwrapped my present and, to my surprise, I had gotten a repair manual for my truck. Apparently, my parents are "Tired of seeing that piece of shit in front of our house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 501

You deserved it 23 113

By Anonymous - 22/11/2013 20:51 - United States - Lake Stevens

Today, my father took revenge on me for bankrupting him in a game of Monopoly. His revenge consisted of having a truckload of sand dumped in my driveway while I was at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 320

You deserved it 3 663

MrClean17 15

Friday 24 May 2013 12:07

*banjo noise in background*

robotiick7 23

Friday 24 May 2013 12:09

Does your grandpa sit in a rocking chair in front with a shotgun in his lap?

Comments

GRgoldfish 19

Friday 24 May 2013 16:16

If your grandfather is threatening your uncle, who lives in a trailer out in the back yard, to return the tires that he stole and pawned from out of his garage, you might be a redneck.

jENtHEeRrN 6

Friday 24 May 2013 16:25

Sounds like someone is confusing "redneck" with "white trash"…

freshko21 6

Friday 24 May 2013 16:48

You know you're a redneck when, "OP's story". lmao good laugh

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 24 May 2013 16:55

You make redneck sound like a bad thing...

Jharrist89 12

Friday 24 May 2013 17:19

At least you didn't find out that your uncle was your daddy!

middlenamefrank 8

Friday 24 May 2013 17:55

I thought rednecks more often settled their differences with shotguns than excavators? Do I have that backwards?

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 24 May 2013 18:34

Yes, it's bluenecks that use shotguns. Why settle differences with a shotgun when the slow lumbering rumble of an excavator can ratchet up the suspense and tension? Shotguns are too fast. Before you can say "What the hell is that, Bubba?" it's over.