Miscellaneous: Today, I received a package from an unknown address. Inside were...

By JellitonOctopus - 25/01/2012 04:51 - United States

Today, I received a package from an unknown address. Inside were doll heads and cigarette butts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 994

You deserved it 2 662

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Same thing different taste

What was in the box?

By Anonymous - 29/09/2024 22:00 - United States - Burlington

Today, I got a notification that a package had been delivered. I opened my door and saw it on at doorstep. I was expecting one, so I grabbed and opened it, then realized it wasn’t mine, but my neighbor’s. I had to awkwardly re-tape it, then sneak over and leave the disturbing contents of the box on their porch before they noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 145

Thanks, I hate it

By CabbageFart92 - 04/09/2017 01:30

Today, a package was delivered to my house. Thinking it was my new blender, I hurriedly brought it in to open it. Inside the box was an assortment of rotten vegetables that stank like Satan's asshole. I have no idea who it's from or why they hate me so much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 623

You deserved it 329

Thanks UPSDHLFML

By Anonymous - 23/09/2021 04:59

Today, my friend received a package I sent her by mail. The package was already ripped open on arrival, two out of the three blouses I sent her were missing and a limited edition glass cup I sent her with the apparel was smashed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 018

You deserved it 77

By Anonymous - 04/10/2014 14:58 - United States - Chicopee

Today, I finally got around to cleaning out my mother's things after her passing. In the process I found a fancy box. What did it contain? A collection of crack pipes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 962

You deserved it 3 210

Thanks, I hate it

By ZeldaovaPeach - 05/07/2016 12:44 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I received an envelope with my name written in beautiful writing in my mailbox. I just moved in the day before and hadn't given the address to anyone or met my neighbors yet so I was a bit surprised by it, even more surprised to find nothing but a dick pic inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 236

You deserved it 1 207

Porch piracy

By Denofthieves - 16/09/2022 16:00

Today, I received a text saying that a package had just been delivered to the house. By the time I reached the front door, it had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 094

You deserved it 110

What is happening right now?

By Kevin can't wait - 21/09/2024 12:00 - France - Brest

Today, I got a notification from a delivery carrier that my package had been delivered. I opened the door to find a perfectly wrapped box with no address, no label, and a note inside saying, "You’ll know when it’s time." I still don’t know what it means. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 75

The nerve!

By Anonymous - 06/12/2021 20:01

Today, a couple of packages were stolen from our apartment doorstep shortly after being delivered. A little while later, the thief brought the torn packaging back and left them at the bottom of our stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 83

Thanks, I guess…

By Anonymous - 12/08/2019 18:00

Today, I got a package containing a present from my grandma. It was a pack of cookies someone gave her for her birthday, and which no one in the family wanted to take home when she offered, because we all found the cookies disgusting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 458

You deserved it 166

By alexbobalex - 11/01/2010 07:23 - Aland Islands

Today, my mom found a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. She hates smoking, so she tore every single cigarette to pieces, then emptied a bag of kitty litter on them. On my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 921

You deserved it 57 634

Rickilynn1 10

Wednesday 25 January 2012 9:01

You have a secret admirer!

azad_fml 0

Wednesday 25 January 2012 9:03

This is a "wtf" situation

Comments

KiddNYC1O 20

Wednesday 25 January 2012 20:50

Chucky's back.

jellitonoctopus 19

Wednesday 25 January 2012 20:57

I'll be waiting for my next package dear. :)

momo1972 3

Wednesday 25 January 2012 21:32

You opened a package from an unknown address from an unknown person? You are stupid

keeks46 12

Wednesday 25 January 2012 21:43

I'm sorry but this is so funny. I had to laugh.

ksm303 0

Wednesday 25 January 2012 22:38

--A is everywhere....

bluebirdy87 0

Wednesday 25 January 2012 23:34

Whoa that's kinda scary

nowais 0

Thursday 26 January 2012 0:01

VOODOO ! Just watch out

Narwhal234 6

Thursday 26 January 2012 0:25

Happy early Birthday!

Haha_no_123 11

Thursday 26 January 2012 0:28

Send it back with a note that says "Throw it out yourself you lazy bitch :)" make sure you add the smiley face :)

ImissCaleb 16

Thursday 26 January 2012 1:00

CSI will make an episode in your memory!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I’m 20 and my mom is well aware I’m having sex. Nonetheless, this morning when my boyfriend was going down on me under the covers, she marched into my room without knocking, dumped a load of wet laundry on my sofa, and walked back out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 464

Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 358

The Top

Today, I was taking a lifeguard certification test. I nearly drowned halfway through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 854

You deserved it 22 325

Today, driving out of my neighbourhood, I encountered three snow plows heading towards me. I tried to turn around in a stranger's driveway but wasn't fast enough, and they left a wall 4-feet high of ice and snow, blocking me in. I rang the doorbell, borrowed their shovel and dug out their driveway. Its -32 with wind-chill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 884

You deserved it 144

Today, I was developing film at Walmart. It started to get a little warm, so I began taking my sweatshirt off. A creepy old man approached me, saying "You know, usually girls like you are paid to take their clothes off." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 580

You deserved it 4 341

Today, I was so happy to be divorced from my asshole husband, I threw my ring off the bridge near the park where we met. As I was walking away, a diver surfaced, yelled, “I think you dropped this, miss” and threw the ring back at me. I can't catch a break today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 672

You deserved it 1 293

Today, my date saw me naked, and was disgusted that 1. I shaved my pubes into a landing strip instead of completely bald, and 2. I missed a few hairs below my knee while shaving my legs. His actual words as he was half out the door were that he "wanted Princess Leia, not Chewbacca." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 194

You deserved it 281

Today, I found out that my favorite band logo is no longer being used by said band because of copyright issues. I have this logo tattooed on my body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 327

You deserved it 57 519

Same thing different taste

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