Embarrassing, ACAB, Parents and Cops: Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you... - FML

By Anonymous - 03/06/2011 01:07 - United States

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 353

You deserved it 3 539

Valentine's Day: Love and Maladresse
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By Anonymous - 12/02/2010 07:51 - Canada

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me!" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 162

You deserved it 2 767

By dani911 - 15/07/2009 01:16 - United States

Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 713

You deserved it 37 372

Road rage

By howannoying - 16/02/2013 06:24 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage". When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 318

You deserved it 3 907

By drivingmecrazy - 13/12/2016 16:54 - United States - Stamford

Today, my mom once again yelled at me for "driving erratically". She texts while driving 70 miles per hour on the highway, but apparently driving through a yellow light is "reckless". FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 280

You deserved it 704

By driverboy - 31/12/2014 08:08 - United States

Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 915

You deserved it 4 879

By Anonymous - 06/02/2014 23:07 - United States - San Ramon

Today, my mother-in-law tried to "accidentally" run me over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 386

You deserved it 4 208

By tramplily - 17/11/2011 05:43 - United States

Today, I was driving home and got a phone call from my mom. She called to tell me that there was a cop at the bottom of our hill, and to be careful. I got a ticket for talking on my cell phone while driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 633

You deserved it 30 524

By Anonymous - 31/10/2011 04:12 - United States

Today, while in the car with my mom, she gave me a lecture about how bad of a driver I am. During that process she ran a red light and hit a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 267

You deserved it 2 652

By Anonymous - 22/12/2010 22:23 - United States

Today, my mother took a bunch of sleeping pills, then went driving. I followed her and dialed 911. Now she thinks that I was "trying to get her arrested," and she refuses to talk to me ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 159

You deserved it 4 857

By shewantsmedead - 26/01/2017 18:00

Today, I ran into my mother-in-law, who I absolutely can't stand, with my car at 5 mph by accident. She jumped out in front of me after a particularly nasty argument, but my husband won't believe me and neither will the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 074

You deserved it 575

Next

Top comments

RugbyKid 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:19

**** you alcoholics I can arrest you whenever I want

roseydot 0

Friday 3 June 2011 8:25

Your mom kicks ass.

Comments

jordynot4you 0

Saturday 4 June 2011 22:49

Lls yes!.

Miranday 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 0:12

Your mom is awsome.

brandy_Dandy78 0

Monday 6 June 2011 0:42

that happened to me but with my cousin!! I kno how you feel

ZacCullen 0

Monday 6 June 2011 1:59

your mom is a boss

sdmarti 0

Monday 6 June 2011 8:34

sounds like ur mom knows how 2 party. ps. wuts her number? ;)

yeaitsnancy 0

Tuesday 7 June 2011 17:23

awesome!!

bbbaileeee 1

Thursday 9 June 2011 5:24

haha i love your mom

katalinawine 0

Friday 12 August 2011 6:29

HILARIOUS!!!!

coolster5000 22

Tuesday 14 August 2012 13:22

best mom ever nuf said

marchelley907 9

Monday 23 September 2013 11:55

omg!?! XD im so sorry..

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The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 581

You deserved it 15 091

Today, while waiting in line for the ski lift, the lady behind me kept stepping on my skis. Annoyed, I turned around and shouted at her, "Get the fuck off my skis!" Just as the last word escaped my mouth, I noticed that my skis were crossed and it was actually me stepping on them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 941

You deserved it 63 789

The Top

Today, I was trying to show my family a cool website. Unfortunately my porn instincts kicked in and I started typing the URL of my favorite porn site. I couldn't stop myself before it autocompleted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 507

You deserved it 39 014

Today, I found out that I am allergic to one of the preservatives that they put in aloe. I found this out after I put some on a severe sunburn I have. Not only am I sunburned, but now I am severely itchy as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 053

You deserved it 4 193

Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 545

You deserved it 2 930

Today, I needed to pee at my friend's house. His bathroom door is often left closed even if there's no one in there, so I knocked just to make sure. His stepdad opened the door stark naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 961

You deserved it 2 801

Today, my boss fired me after chewing me out for the horrible date he had with my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 735

You deserved it 4 473

Today, I'd finally reached my goal weight. I went into the office where my husband was, to show him the new size 8 jeans I'd bought. He responded with "I wouldn't buy any more clothes, you'll be putting the weight back on again soon." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 005

You deserved it 4 242