Animals: Today, I smashed a spider with my pencil eraser. Later, I absentmindedly...

By GetMeTheDamnBleach - 21/10/2014 19:46 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I smashed a spider with my pencil eraser. Later, I absentmindedly chewed on it while doing my homework. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 519

You deserved it 32 150

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Same thing different taste

By Heyme - 09/12/2008 13:50 - France

Today, I was working and eating. I was so tired that I bit into my pen and smeared my chocolate-filled pastry on my exercise book. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 380

You deserved it 6 724

By scarred4life - 27/04/2011 14:05 - Canada

Today, I was absentmindedly playing with a piece of lint. When I looked at it, I realized that I had been rolling and squeezing a dead spider in my fingers for about five minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 829

You deserved it 19 096

By dumbblonde - 06/08/2009 03:04 - United States

Today, I was sitting at the computer when this really annoying fly kept landing on the keyboard. After a while, I took the bottom of a pen and squished it. Twenty minutes later I absentmindedly started chewing at the bottom of the pen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 274

You deserved it 62 327

By lorena_v - 10/11/2017 05:00

Today, I screamed at the top of my lungs in the middle of a math test because I saw a spider that wound up being a hairball. My teacher was incredibly sympathetic, taking off only five points for "disrupting our working environment". FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 349

You deserved it 3 847

By somuchforthat - 19/02/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 702

You deserved it 2 517

Best teeth in the game

By Nochnoii - 07/10/2009 20:07 - Belgium

Today, I was chewing my pen while I was paying attention to my teacher. I chewed a bit too hard, and something broke off, so I casually looked at my pen. It was unharmed. One of my front teeth had broken off. Everyone in class, including the teacher, had to see it before I could call my dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 657

You deserved it 13 255

By gaggin - 26/12/2012 19:30 - United States - Beverly Hills

Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 154

You deserved it 3 984

Happy meal

By ollierocks96 - 17/12/2009 21:43 - United States

Today, I was eating lunch outside with my friends, when a spider fell on one guy's back. I glanced at it and opened my mouth to warn him when another guy flicked it and it went into my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 556

You deserved it 3 024

By Jesus - 27/09/2011 02:03 - Canada

Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 260

You deserved it 31 997

By Annie - 24/08/2015 08:46 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was laying on the couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 787

You deserved it 9 258

leaper66 12

Wednesday 22 October 2014 1:19

Hope it didn't taste too bad...

BeepBeepSwerve 9

Wednesday 22 October 2014 1:19

a little mid afternoon snack!

Comments

catanita 18

Wednesday 22 October 2014 8:13

A very good source of proteins.

GuiLD15 7

Wednesday 22 October 2014 10:38

why all the ydi points

katties 27

Wednesday 22 October 2014 17:38

Because it's the person's own fault for having such nasty habits

Baileysear488 17

Wednesday 22 October 2014 16:27

Its karma, the spider wants revenge. ;)

prettyinpinkxoxo 9

Wednesday 22 October 2014 16:31

Ew ew ew >__

winnizzo 7

Wednesday 22 October 2014 19:06

Lol pay back time

aine500 16

Wednesday 22 October 2014 19:22

I feel like throwing up now

megansheeran 21

Wednesday 22 October 2014 23:33

I really hope you washed your mouth out multiple times...ew.

Jaighalor 5

Thursday 23 October 2014 0:11

Solution, don't do homework...

beybmoo 15

Thursday 23 October 2014 2:18

It's called 'karma'.

Kimmy3214 9

Thursday 23 October 2014 23:51

Lol! ? sorry but this was too funny!

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend went through my phone while I was in the bathroom, to check if I was cheating. I'm not. He was looking for some leverage for when he told me he's been fucking my best friend for the last year, he could use something against me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 439

You deserved it 259

Today, after living in my new apartment for barely three weeks, I found mice living under my dishwasher. When I brought it up to the managers, they said I'd have to pay for an exterminator myself since they weren't there when they cleaned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 393

You deserved it 1 425

The Top

Today, I was at a house delivering pizza. As I walked away, I heard the mom mutter to her child, "That's why you go to college." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 822

You deserved it 6 205

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 940

You deserved it 8 226

Today, I've spent far too long on hold to Apple customer support. Unfortunately the only thing to come from it is I now have "Call me maybe" stuck in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 649

You deserved it 3 474

Today, it's been 6 months since I last heard from my kid's mother. That's abandonment where I live. I don't know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 884

You deserved it 916

Today, I was helping my uncle clean his house. He's a bit of a hoarder, so I suggested donating some of his pots. We got into a fight and I left. He then called my mom to claim that I stole his pots. After being yelled at he realized that they were in his dishwasher. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 891

You deserved it 168

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 674

You deserved it 78 142

Same thing different taste

Best teeth in the game

Happy meal

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