Health: Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but... - FML

By Aliiiice - 16/07/2013 13:18 - France - Offranville

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 679

You deserved it 35 923

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

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Same thing different taste

By jsmills92 - 21/12/2012 00:26 - United States - Cranston

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 422

You deserved it 4 452

By Username - 16/12/2011 06:31 - Canada

Today, I hit a new low when I caught myself eating the chocolates that were meant to be part of my boyfriend's Christmas presents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 654

You deserved it 33 235

By OldHabitsDieHard - 18/09/2013 14:53 - United States - Erie

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 719

You deserved it 18 757

By Aled - 17/02/2011 16:33 - United Kingdom

Today, I found my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 831

You deserved it 3 333

By Emmaraine189 - 28/04/2016 02:22 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I saw my cat licking something on the side of the road and went to check what it was. It was someone's old cigarette. I now know why she wants to be let out so often: She's addicted to nicotine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 388

You deserved it 1 308

By Hairball - 01/09/2009 18:05 - United States

Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 448

You deserved it 404 811

By Anonymous - 07/07/2011 22:52 - United States

Today, I helped myself to some homemade biscuits that had been left in the kitchen. I thought they looked a little odd, but they tasted pretty good. I found out later they were homemade dog treats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 500

You deserved it 30 646

Yummy

By Sisi - 29/08/2016 16:49 - United States - Mesa

Today, my roommate left a bomb looking package of cookies on the kitchen counter. My sweet tooth got the best of me and I made that split second decision of, "Oh, I'll just have one." Halfway through it, I noticed the fine print, "For dogs" on the package. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 519

You deserved it 11 322

Willpower

By Anonymous - 11/09/2019 14:00

Today, I started my new health kick with granola for breakfast, salad for lunch, and hitting the gym after work. I was so proud of myself, until I couldn’t take it anymore and binged at McDonald’s. My health kick lasted 11 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 782

You deserved it 1 771

By Michelle - 26/04/2010 21:42 - New Zealand

Today, I decided to quit smoking. During my lunch break, I tried to ash the KitKat bar that was in my hand after I took a bite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 713

You deserved it 17 354

Next

Top comments

ShananaginsLOL 13

Tuesday 16 July 2013 19:01

I love the way you worded that.

TheLadyOpal 30

Tuesday 16 July 2013 19:01

Oh, now THIS is an FML I'd like to see a comic for.

Comments

UofLCardFan08 6

Wednesday 24 July 2013 7:49

This was gold.

The_9th_Doctor 18

Thursday 22 August 2013 16:44

just why?

alex_jaguara 32

Friday 21 March 2014 22:26

That plot twist! I thouth you were going for the cigarettes.

hitchhikerryder 20

Wednesday 30 July 2014 19:24

I thought you were talking about cigarettes

larrybird2176 11

Friday 14 August 2015 9:46

Okay okay WHAT?!

Rubly 10

Saturday 25 June 2016 19:11

"In this episode of My Strange Addiction..."

Hgbest11 6

Tuesday 6 December 2016 5:11

this made me laugh so ******* hard. thank you ?

Emily Kate Condon 5

Friday 22 September 2017 6:31

youve cat to be kitten me right meow

Keywords

Surprise Love Cute Awkward My ex Texting Wanker Intimacy Sex Mental health Health Insomnia Sleep Food Cooking Kids Parents Weekend Pranks Annoying Miscellaneous Work Embarrassing Technology Coworkers Zoom Argument Roommate Pizza Animals

The Top

Today, I had a job interview for the perfect job. My phone rang in my pocket. I’d forgotten to silence it. The worst part? The ringtone was a guy saying “Pussy!” on a continuous loop. The interviewer chewed me out for being “unprofessional” and kicked me out. I have no idea who set that ringtone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 1 166

Today, my BFF and I put our kids on the bus, and went shopping and have lunch. We were both eating a gross amount of Taco Bell sitting in the middle of the parking lot. The cops pulled up. Someone had called them, saying we were doing drugs because of the way we were sitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 097

You deserved it 218

The Top

Today, I told my boss I need a scrub brush to properly clean the stairs at my workplace. She gave me an old toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 360

You deserved it 1 872

Today, I was working at the mall as Santa, when a little girl took a shit in my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 054

You deserved it 4 410

Today, I was in a support group talking about how my sister and I were raised in a cult. Never one to be outdone, the loud mouth of the group piped up and scoffed, “Oh please! If it didn’t make the news and no one died, then it wasn’t a cult!” Sorry I wasn’t murdered. It was still abusive as fuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 302

You deserved it 135

Today, I woke up from surgery with nurses all giggling at me. I asked them what was wrong, and apparently I’m now famous as the guy who kept getting boners every 10 minutes, until finally the surgeon used surgical tape to stick it to my thigh to keep it out out of his way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 098

You deserved it 223

Today, I was at work at Walmart, casually walking in the middle of the store, when my foot caught on something, so I went flying forward and yelled, being caught off guard, to the point I had to pretend I was running for 3 seconds, then someone blocked my path so I suddenly had to stop. Everyone was staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 584

You deserved it 328

Today, I took an extra Xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 380

You deserved it 10 731