I honestly thought initially you meant eat a ****. And so before I clicked on it to see your name and gender I assumed you were a girl haha. On the mobile app btw.

You want to choke on his ****?

Um, No comment about the **** part, but far as the washroom breaks try wearing ear plugs.

How is "choked the ****" any kind of subtle metaphor? We all know what you mean doofus!

Go find some pussy you pussy

Reading the comments on this one is way more entertaining that reading the actual fml.

People out there who are telling OP to get a girlfriend... Do you know how difficult it is to be an exchange student? He's only been there 3 days - he probably barely knows their language, he's likely still very stressed about living in a completely new and strange place, and maybe he still suffers a little from jetlag. It's possible he hasn't even started in school yet, which is your main way to be social on an exchange. I can understand why he'd feel the need to get down to earth and do something that isn't totally new and changed. OP, I hope you have a wonderful time(hehehe). -A fellow exchange student.

Go to a bar, smile at a girl who stands around the bar area, ask if she works there and then just go with her because apparently brothels are also in bars in some parts of Belgium?

Um wow I gotta say tmi even for FML. FML for having to read that. I'm sure you'll find a way lol.

why not find a girl and have her choke on your...