Miscellaneous: Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that...

By me - 04/04/2013 20:07 - United States - Parrish

Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that he looks like Walt from Breaking Bad. I quickly got sent to the principal's office and received a 3-day suspension for "slandering" my teacher by implying that he makes meth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 450

You deserved it 6 708

Back to school: Courses and confusion
When the campus comes back to life, anecdotes abound between the lecture halls and student parties! More…

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Same thing different taste

By assumed - 01/03/2011 16:47

Today, during a class, I noticed some racist statements and symbols on a table. While erasing them, I bent down to pick up my dropped pencil. I look back up to see a teacher, and got a suspension. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 576

You deserved it 3 742

By Anonymous - 28/10/2011 15:52 - United States

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 588

You deserved it 5 688

By eemp - 05/02/2010 05:01 - France

Today, I got sent to detention for saying, "That's what she said" after a girl in my class said, "Push a little harder" while dissecting a frog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 694

You deserved it 28 268

By Jay - 04/11/2017 04:00

Today, I got called into the principal's office of my son's school. Why? He'd called his teacher a "fudge packer". No more weekends with his uncle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 293

You deserved it 361

What did you expect?

By Effing buzzkill - 04/07/2023 10:00

Today, I stole a classmate’s graphic calculator because I couldn’t afford one. She reported it missing to the professor. He wouldn’t let anyone leave class until it turned up. Not even saying I had diarrhea had him let me go. In fact, he told me to empty my backpack right there and then. I’m suspended. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 2 533

By Matthew - 04/07/2018 22:30

Today, during science, my friend thought it would be funny to pour corrosive acids into the reaction test I was making. I had to explain to my parents why I have no eyebrows, but the worst part is that I only got a D. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 608

You deserved it 335

By Anonymous - 09/04/2013 10:29 - France - Paris

Today, my halitosis was so bad that when I blew onto my solution in chemistry class, it reacted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 145

You deserved it 10 653

By hangman - 01/08/2013 18:25 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my boss suspended me for laughing too hard at my desk and causing a big scene in front of our customers. I was laughing because he'd forwarded me a hilarious email. He was practically smirking as he handed me my official warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 747

You deserved it 4 530

Kids…

By Courtney - 26/05/2016 12:12 - United States

Today, at my job as a teacher, I saw a student cut another student's hair, I stopped a group of students from eating glue, and I had to tell a student to put away the toy cars he was playing with. I teach high school math. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 378

You deserved it 1 273

By WaltTheFuckDad - 01/09/2013 23:06 - United States - Salida

Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 382

You deserved it 3 605

friedpwnadge 25

Friday 5 April 2013 3:23

The school system is bad and it should feel bad!

MarisaCB 16

Friday 5 April 2013 3:24

This is why school boards annoy me. Stuff like this.

Comments

wroofer 2

Tuesday 9 April 2013 5:10

It's because now you found out his secret!

patrick29 1

Thursday 18 April 2013 20:21

Good complement if u ask me. Heisenberg kicks ass!

Wealthyparrot 9

Tuesday 14 May 2013 0:30

Three days off, and if anyone questions your record, it's easy to explain.

legendxs 20

Monday 27 May 2013 9:59

The school system sucks

Scoty49 10

Friday 7 June 2013 18:48

>implying he makes meth

colby6666 43

Saturday 31 January 2015 14:28

Yeah; Walt's ******* bad ass.

fantasyworld 37

Monday 29 June 2015 19:16

He needs to lighten up.

SaniK 17

Saturday 1 August 2015 21:46

That you can fight back said he looked like a celebrity and was said as a compliment having nothing to do with the tv show

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Friday 20 May 2016 19:28

American schools, need I say more?

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The Top

Today, my BFF and I put our kids on the bus, and went shopping and have lunch. We were both eating a gross amount of Taco Bell sitting in the middle of the parking lot. The cops pulled up. Someone had called them, saying we were doing drugs because of the way we were sitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 097

You deserved it 218

Today, I am babysitting my niece for the first time. After getting her to go to sleep, I felt a sudden urge to sneeze. My sneezes are loud as hell. Attempts to dampen the sound were unsuccessful. My colossal sneeze scared the bejesus out of her, waking her up again, and now she's afraid of me. What do I do now? FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 121

The Top

Today, my friend casually asked if she could “gift” me to her husband for his birthday threesome. I told her she was being rude, and made me feel cheap and objectified. She scoffed and said, "What’s the big deal? Aren’t all you bi chicks into that anyway?” No. No I’m not. So much for friendship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 217

You deserved it 378

Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 374

You deserved it 23 964

Today, I went to school without makeup. No one recognized me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 768

You deserved it 44 560

Today, some jackass spider decided to lay eggs behind my wall. No matter how many I kill, I always wake up to multiple baby spiders on my ceiling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 394

You deserved it 119

Today, I realized that I hadn't heard anything about my upcoming class reunion. Turns out it was an invite via Facebook that I didn't receive because most of my classmates are on my block list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 315

You deserved it 7 842

Today, I began my job as an intern at a high school. I saw one of the students looked very familiar, and I couldn't remember from where. Then I figured it out, I had hooked up with him at a club last week. He's a junior in high school, I'm in my last year of college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 165

You deserved it 52 181

Same thing different taste

What did you expect?

Kids…

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