Intimacy: Today, I took a shower with my boyfriend. I tried to be adventurous...

By pleasedie - 07/05/2015 18:00 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I took a shower with my boyfriend. I tried to be adventurous and went to give him a blowjob, only to end up slipping and head-butting him in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 035

You deserved it 6 802

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Same thing different taste

By kinkicali - 20/11/2012 08:43 - United States - Maple Valley

Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 498

You deserved it 36 511

Sexy moves

By what sex life? - 02/08/2016 06:26 - United States - Nashville

Today, while in the shower with my boyfriend, I tried to heat things up by washing his knob with my loofa. He couldn't stop laughing and eventually laughed so hard that he slipped and fell. He now has a bruised butt while I have a missing toenail from catching his fall. Ouch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 291

You deserved it 2 896

Wrong sort of poking

By Anonymous - 22/09/2013 05:40 - United States - Brandon

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 193

You deserved it 9 739

Sick moves, dude

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 09:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 405

You deserved it 4 241

One nation, under rod

By LaLa - 20/09/2019 22:00

Today, I was fooling around with my partner after his shower. He moved my hands up to push me against the wall. Instead of hitting the wall, my hands hit the shower rod. It fell on my face and I got a bloody nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 511

You deserved it 213

So generous

By noway - 10/08/2011 17:47 - Singapore

Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 164

You deserved it 7 104

No nut will do that

By Anonymous - 02/05/2023 00:00

Today, my boyfriend wanted a blowjob, shortly after we've started dating. He said to be careful because he blows a massive load. Thinking he's full of crap, I rolled my eyes and got to work. Had him going and then a massive load shot down my throat and a bunch of fire hoses sprayed out my nose. It burned so bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 426

You deserved it 1 338

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 474

You deserved it 8 533

By Anonymous - 07/11/2010 22:00 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 960

You deserved it 6 539

Heat of passion

By owl + bungee cord - 07/01/2014 20:38 - United States - Herndon

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 538

You deserved it 10 056

Welshite 39

Friday 8 May 2015 0:10

Definitely not the type of head he was expecting.

Krwman 8

Friday 8 May 2015 0:11

Well, your heart is in the right place; even if the rest of you wasn't.

Comments

Bragi 12

Friday 8 May 2015 0:13

Don't fret, OP, it happens a lot.

geehel_fml 8

Friday 8 May 2015 2:29

Happens a lot? Head-butt in the nuts? You should have a strange life! luckily, I live faaaaaar away from you!

JustinJK 21

Friday 8 May 2015 9:13

This has like never happened to me.

Waschlappen 23

Friday 8 May 2015 10:53

I agree with you, maybe not head-butt in the nuts, but I have accidentally hit and kicked my boyfriend in the nuts a couple of times.

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 8 May 2015 14:47

accidentally.... right...

funneh1 21

Friday 8 May 2015 0:17

This made me cringe...and I don't even have any testicles...ouch.

samanthahaha 9

Friday 8 May 2015 0:17

Lmbo! (Laughing my balls off)

TheIronFez 13

Friday 8 May 2015 3:51

HA HA. HA. AH. So funny.

brandan020 10

Friday 8 May 2015 0:18

i would say "your life sucks" id say "his life sucks" oh my lord...

BattyMomma 7

Friday 8 May 2015 0:18

To prevent this from happening again: buy a shower mat.

redpanda39 10

Friday 8 May 2015 3:41

I have a series of whimsical duck stickers in my tub.

siggy_mcsigx 22

Friday 8 May 2015 0:20

Shower sex is always so awkward in reality xD

Cassandra2015 21

Friday 8 May 2015 0:37

how is shower sex awkward ? I think it's pretty enjoyable to be honest ...

Exodiafinder687 58

Friday 8 May 2015 0:54

It gets pretty awkward when you have so many people staring at you. That's the last time I have shower sex at the YMCA.

woodboys23 4

Friday 8 May 2015 2:10

Uhhh Why

a1_z9 10

Friday 8 May 2015 2:50

a1_z9 10

Friday 8 May 2015 2:57

It probably depends on the type of shower you have. The last time I tried it I decided it would be much better without being in a cramped slippery box with water getting in my eyes. The bathroom floor worked pretty well though!

tburkey17 9

Friday 8 May 2015 4:35

I think this was funnier then the fml??

mergeterge 24

Friday 8 May 2015 8:08

To people asking why: 1) water ironically make things LESS lubed 2) it is hard to find the right position in such a small place and 3) shit like this FML happens! Unlubed, cramped, and painful sex is not as fun as it seems in the movies.