Intimacy: Today, I took a shower with my boyfriend. I tried to be adventurous...

FML for mobile
Free

By pleasedie - 07/05/2015 18:00 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I took a shower with my boyfriend. I tried to be adventurous and went to give him a blowjob, only to end up slipping and head-butting him in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 069

You deserved it 6 817

Fête de la Musique: Notes et Négligences
When melodies meet misadventures, the Fête de la Musique becomes a symphony of laughter! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By kinkicali - 20/11/2012 08:43 - United States - Maple Valley

Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 507

You deserved it 36 531

Sexy moves

By what sex life? - 02/08/2016 06:26 - United States - Nashville

Today, while in the shower with my boyfriend, I tried to heat things up by washing his knob with my loofa. He couldn't stop laughing and eventually laughed so hard that he slipped and fell. He now has a bruised butt while I have a missing toenail from catching his fall. Ouch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 301

You deserved it 2 904

Wrong sort of poking

By Anonymous - 22/09/2013 05:40 - United States - Brandon

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 207

You deserved it 9 744

Sick moves, dude

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 09:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 416

You deserved it 4 243

One nation, under rod

By LaLa - 20/09/2019 22:00

Today, I was fooling around with my partner after his shower. He moved my hands up to push me against the wall. Instead of hitting the wall, my hands hit the shower rod. It fell on my face and I got a bloody nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 522

You deserved it 215

So generous

By noway - 10/08/2011 17:47 - Singapore

Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 179

You deserved it 7 109

No nut will do that

By Anonymous - 02/05/2023 00:00

Today, my boyfriend wanted a blowjob, shortly after we've started dating. He said to be careful because he blows a massive load. Thinking he's full of crap, I rolled my eyes and got to work. Had him going and then a massive load shot down my throat and a bunch of fire hoses sprayed out my nose. It burned so bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 464

You deserved it 1 534

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 491

You deserved it 8 541

By Anonymous - 07/11/2010 22:00 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 977

You deserved it 6 545

Heat of passion

By owl + bungee cord - 07/01/2014 20:38 - United States - Herndon

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 551

You deserved it 10 062

Welshite 39

Friday 8 May 2015 0:10

Definitely not the type of head he was expecting.

Krwman 8

Friday 8 May 2015 0:11

Well, your heart is in the right place; even if the rest of you wasn't.

Comments

mattrd_fml 31

Friday 8 May 2015 1:38

sounds like a sucky situation.

nysucker 8

Friday 8 May 2015 1:42

Its the thought that counts. You'll just learn what to do next time...

ENCOURAGER 12

Friday 8 May 2015 1:44

And at tht time she knew she ****** up

mustangbravo 27

Friday 8 May 2015 2:07

It's the thought that counts.

brvnnx 18

Friday 8 May 2015 2:11

Wrong definition of "shower head"

gintwinsmoore 20

Friday 8 May 2015 2:21

I think an illustration is in order here...who's with me???

RoseCrystal 17

Friday 8 May 2015 2:40

That was rather ballsy of you.

thenielsens 12

Friday 8 May 2015 3:41

Well I doubt he will be bothering you for another shower ******** anytime soon. It's the thought that counts ?

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 8 May 2015 14:53

mission accomplished?

jacknhisbox 2

Friday 8 May 2015 3:43

Fyl? He got headbutted in the balls. FHL!

captainsmegma 12

Friday 8 May 2015 3:44

But did he get a ********? ??

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Gross Instagram Embarrassing Love Social Media Crush Shoes Zoom Cars Music Neighbours Singing Cute My ex Transportation Awkward Work Anxiety Money Delivery Technology Relatable Intimacy NSFW Weird Poopoo peepee Health Sports Underwear

The Top

Today, I got turned down by a woman I like because she said a man in his mid 30’s who’s not already married with kids is a major red flag. I would very much like to be married with kids but it’s just never happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 484

You deserved it 49

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 701

You deserved it 42 204

The Top

Today, I was walking my new dog and saw this girl that I've had a crush on for months. When I approached her, I tried to look 'macho' with my dog. However my dog thought it would be more attractive to pee on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 873

You deserved it 10 791

Today, I finally worked up the nerve to text the girl I've had a crush on to ask her on a date. I got back the reply, "Error message 3265: Number No Longer In Swrvice." Not only can she not spell, when I looked it up, "error 3265" doesn't even exist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 718

You deserved it 9 073

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. We got on the discussion of animals, and I showed them a picture of my cat on my phone. Being a touchscreen, when her father grabbed it, it changed picture. To a picture of my girlfriend, fully nude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 896

You deserved it 91 029

Today, I realized that my husband's family hates me for something I did 10 years ago. When I was 18. I’m so done apologizing for it. My daughter does not deserve to see her mother treated like this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 978

You deserved it 200

Today, I took my class to swimming lessons at the local public pool. One student came out and proudly told me that she'd pooed in the shower, but it was OK because she'd then picked it up and flushed it down the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 443

You deserved it 2 549

Today, after having loaned my girlfriend money after she claimed to be broke and unable to pay her rent and electricity bills, she went out, spent it all on a new purse and phone, and now refuses to pay me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 799

You deserved it 6 631