Intimacy: Today, I took my girlfriends virginity and had given it my all....

By sadsexer23 - 16/02/2010 03:10 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriends virginity and had given it my all. When I had finished, sweating and tired, I looked down at her and smiled, obviously pleased with myself. She looked up at me and said, "Wait, was that it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 828

You deserved it 6 735

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/05/2015 02:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 013

You deserved it 4 134

By Lady Vulva - 19/09/2015 02:56

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 974

You deserved it 3 073

Let down

By anonymous - 21/06/2009 02:00 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 230

You deserved it 17 261

Like a virgin

By chchboy - 22/05/2012 05:05 - United States

Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 151

You deserved it 7 122

Nuts

By Anonymous - 15/09/2011 20:03 - United States

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 874

You deserved it 6 151

No good

By :(( - 28/09/2013 21:24 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 436

You deserved it 8 032

By unsatisfied - 09/02/2010 03:33 - France

Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 463

You deserved it 5 362

By fuck you, Odin, FUCK YOU - 03/03/2014 22:35 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 322

You deserved it 9 621

By Anonymous - 04/02/2013 17:17 - United States - Durham

Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 416

You deserved it 3 890

Fast and Furious

By Anonymous - 02/03/2020 01:00

Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML

I agree, your life sucks 880

You deserved it 1 782

pokerface5 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:09

is ur dick small????

pohoo 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:09

If so, use fist.

Comments

XDNurse 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:19

yea snick... the old red bull and monster right before sex... maybe then he'd last long enough for her to notice?

AliceBlack 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:21

... ouch.

lynsieloowho 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:24

wow that sucks lol

fuckyouasshole66 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:26

snickerdoodles i wouldnt touch u with a ten foot pole and way epic FAIL!

melonkelly 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 10:11

lmfaoooooo!!!

aDerangedStateOf 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 13:07

I'll touch snickerdoodles with my pole....

aDerangedStateOf 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 13:09

.... Wait is snickerdoodles a guy or girl?

imcannedfruit 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 13:50

Girl. -_-

DarkArchon 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 20:06

I really like how you **** first, ask questions later 

sweet_mcluvin 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 23:53

ha that was really funny

helo2 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 2:04

hahaha deranged

allan_069 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:26

this is ******* hilarious!!! sorry dude try harder next time. or practice more often. or grow a bigger ****! lol

Bl0OdYShAdOw 0

Saturday 31 July 2010 19:57

Are you stupid or something. You can't just magically grow 10 inches overnight retard. Seriously read your posts before you actually post them.

cono1717 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:27

you need some practice buddy. FYL

amazinggbaby 2

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:28

Considering she was a virgin, she was probably pretty tight making him finish faster. If he has a small dick it doesn't mean that would make him finish faster.

DarkArchon 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:29

Sir, if you could give me you man card and proof of sexuality, and step out of the Prius. Work on your bluffing a little more mate. Next time she says that say, "That was me getting warmed up." Then you can bring your chips to the table. (That was a terrible sexual innuendo)

wtfsauce 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 9:30

my guess is that she's not a virgin or else you didn't pop her since you're so small.

ohSNAPyall 26

Tuesday 16 February 2010 17:18

I'm thinking it's more likely that he didn't spend enough time on foreplay. I heard a great metaphor about this: men are microwaves; women are crock pots. It takes women longer to heat up.

automatedeffemel 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 19:00

To me, it sounds a lot like missionary until he was done and it didn't do absolutely anything for her. OP, try different positions, get and keep her hot and bothered and learn to use your fingers and tongue.