Intimacy: Today, I tried having intercourse with my boyfriend, and about... - FML

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By VampiresSayRawr - 28/03/2009 03:16 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I tried having intercourse with my boyfriend, and about 30 seconds in, I heard flipping. He was looking at a porn magazine. "It's to keep my erection" he answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98 734

You deserved it 9 801

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By giantcuntflaps - 13/12/2014 16:03 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 542

You deserved it 6 874

Booktok

By eakthegeek - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Spicy

Today, I was sexing it up with my boyfriend. Halfway through, he looked at me and said, "Y'know what you never see in a porno? Intellectual conversation. Read any good books lately?" He wouldn't keep going until I answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 771

You deserved it 7 070

Booming

By Anonymous - 26/04/2013 22:22 - United States - Arvada

Spicy

Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 942

You deserved it 10 204

Actor's Studio

By darthmilfious - 31/03/2010 07:56 - France

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 688

You deserved it 69 163

You've tried this before, right?

By xxxzzzooo - 02/01/2010 17:22 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He tried to put it in unerected. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 571

You deserved it 3 809

Come again

By Anonymous - 09/07/2009 07:35

Spicy

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 997

You deserved it 62 551

What is it?

By Anonymous - 06/08/2009 22:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 216

You deserved it 8 230

By apparently inexperienced - 11/09/2012 16:54 - United States - Brockton

Spicy

Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and told me I need to watch more porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 775

You deserved it 6 498

By Anonymous - 18/07/2013 19:01 - Netherlands - Herkenbosch

Spicy

Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't in the mood. A half hour later, I caught him jerking off to several windows of porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 485

You deserved it 6 681

By princess - 12/04/2014 21:01 - United States - San Marcos

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky, and I whispered that I love him. He immediately lost his boner, and a few minutes later "remembered" he had to be somewhere else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 598

You deserved it 7 165

Next

Top comments

dlogsr 1

Saturday 28 March 2009 11:13

maybe because you called it "intercourse".

danza_fml 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 10:49

30 seconds? No comment.

Comments

wowwcaazoww 0

Friday 17 July 2009 17:53

what are you talking about #16?! how can you even compare erectile disfunction to not wanting a dick up your ass?

tonyhenz 0

Monday 12 April 2010 0:40

well that's ur own damn fault. stfu. turn ur guy on then

psymon_fml 0

Monday 4 October 2010 4:45

dump his chump @ss. l!mp d!ck b@st@rd!

Lgardner 0

Friday 7 January 2011 21:00

Dump him

aandfgirlie45 0

Thursday 31 March 2011 9:41

oh my..

reversezebra 0

Tuesday 3 May 2011 22:11

heh..

cheygirl 0

Tuesday 12 July 2011 11:00

well 30 seconds... tell him to hold off for a couple minutes on the **** he's obviously not attracted to you.

Random1Here 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 6:15

How is it his fault? She posted the fml not him.

Kap10 0

Monday 29 August 2011 18:17

Id be embarrased if i was him.

aparent3576 0

Sunday 11 September 2011 14:40

Rip his balls off, then ask him how he'll keep his erection now.

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Keywords

Vacation Relatable TV shows Health Periods Kids Cute Love Abuse Gross Healthy Lifestyle Parenting Smells Cheating Flowers Sex My ex Money Awkward Instagram Social Media Hospital Pregnancy Animals Dogs Death Sadness Intimacy AITA Technology

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 354

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The Top

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Today, my mom blew her top when I casually mentioned that it's pretty well known that the story of Jesus is a retelling of older Persian and Egyptian stories. She then went on to yell at me that I wasted my money on college and "book learning". FML

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You deserved it 10 726

Today, I dressed up sexy to cheer up my boyfriend after a bad day at work. Instead of being cheered up, he accused me of dressing up that way for the male DJs at the radio station where I work. FML

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You deserved it 3 219