Miscellaneous: Today, I tried to take a piss in the woods, but ended up peeing...

By Dani - 24/01/2012 05:23 - Australia

Today, I tried to take a piss in the woods, but ended up peeing all over my feet. I still had to hike another five hours in wet shoes. My boyfriend's only comment was, "At least you didn't wet your pants." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 330

You deserved it 26 735

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Same thing different taste

By whyme_ss - 23/02/2010 22:10 - United States

Today, I got into my boyfriends car having to pee really badly. I accidentally peed everywhere. He kicked me out. I had to walk four miles home in 20 degree weather. In wet clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 141

You deserved it 45 301

By gameguy3424 - 18/05/2009 03:37 - United States

Today, I went on my afternoon stroll to my local park. As I reached the park a little boy was peeing in the bushes nearby. His mother called. As I walked by, he turned, still peeing, right to me. He ended up peeing on the front of my pants and on my shoes. My house is two miles away from the park. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 623

You deserved it 3 206

When you gotta go, you gotta go

By Amanda Howard - 15/03/2020 09:00

Today, I came home after being stuck in traffic needing to pee really badly. When I went to the bathroom, my boyfriend was on the toilet. I couldn't hold it longer, so I went into the woods behind our house and found a bush. Relieving myself, my butt started to itch. I was sitting in poison ivy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 570

You deserved it 522

By blabla - 28/10/2011 13:30 - Brazil

Today, I rushed home during a torrential downpour. When I got back, I went to take a pee and took off my wet socks while I had the chance. Once I finished, I stood up with used toilet paper in one hand and wet socks in the other. Guess which I tossed into the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 317

You deserved it 12 996

By anti-peecleaner - 22/11/2010 22:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 447

You deserved it 5 234

The call of the wild

By Anonymous - 16/05/2022 20:00 - United States - Crown Point

Today, I went camping with my boyfriend. We were sleeping on a small slope. He got so drunk he peed in his sleep. I was downhill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 944

You deserved it 160

Marking territory

By Anonymous - 02/01/2020 20:00 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, while on a picnic with my boyfriend, he got a little drunk. All of a sudden, he got up, pulled his pants down and pissed all over me. His excuse? "Just marking my territory." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 749

You deserved it 336

Sprinkler

By shelly - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was locked out of my house and had to pee. I waited an hour for my boyfriend to come home. When I saw him pull into the driveway, I peed myself in excitement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 958

You deserved it 7 573

By WhyTheFNot - 20/06/2009 18:06 - United States

Today, I came home from work and had to pee so badly that I ran to the bathroom and ripped my pants down. My touch screen phone dropped from my pocket and started calling my boyfriend. Since I couldn't quite reach the phone, I left a message of me peeing on his cell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 476

You deserved it 9 331

By jakethed0g - 10/08/2011 21:37 - United Kingdom

Today, I was camping with my family, and had to share a tent with my 13 year old brother. During the night he had to pee, but instead of going outside to use the bathroom, he zipped open a section of the tent, stuck his knob through it, and peed all over my shoes that were drying outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 364

You deserved it 3 068

ComTlancy 12

Tuesday 24 January 2012 11:31

That was a piss-poor effort. Are you feeling a bit flushed? I'll stop the toilet humour now.

yahoowizard 16

Tuesday 24 January 2012 11:38

Now if a jellyfish comes out of nowhere and stings your leg, you're set

Comments

doorick 4

Wednesday 25 January 2012 1:00

You should have squated while you look a leak.. seems like a no brainer

adamo_erebus 26

Wednesday 25 January 2012 1:09

this is why having a penis has its benefits

Let7396 0

Wednesday 25 January 2012 3:21

fail. its common sense to squat.

bubo_fml 10

Wednesday 25 January 2012 4:42

Your boyfriend's a cad. A true gent would've gingerly craddled you in his arms as you deficated all over his shoes & trousers. Next time, ask if he would be so kind...

Iellwen 12

Wednesday 25 January 2012 9:58

Ah, but a true gentlewoman would not have "pissed" in close range of said boyfriend. ;)

matthewkato 5

Wednesday 25 January 2012 4:50

You coulda hiked barefoot

kristena103 14

Wednesday 25 January 2012 5:35

If u pee in the woods (if ur a girl) sit down like ur taking a poo and pee not pee standing up but dont pee actually

Meesersuperman1 4

Wednesday 25 January 2012 6:19

Shutup. Don't be mad at you boyfriend because he didn't say anything that pleases you. He should be mad at you. It's like he's babysitting a potty-training child. Then you just complain.

Skymone 6

Wednesday 25 January 2012 17:52

How did you get your shoes that wet??? Seriously, when the first few drops hit your shoes, didn't you think: "Hm, maybe I'm doing this wrong"? Also, what did you expect your boyfriend to say to make pee on your shoes better? :S

iameulogy 0

Wednesday 25 January 2012 19:51

at least he didn't ridicule you mercilessly. that being his only comment means he really doesn't give a shit if you pissed on your shoes. that's love baby! lmao

TheYamBagga 5

Thursday 26 January 2012 16:49

Well it's true...what did you want him to say? "Here babe take my boots that won't fit you, I'll go barefoot" yeah right... And at least he was trying to make light of the situation, you're the retard that pissed all over yourself...you're lucky he didn't make fun of you cause I sure would've...piss poor performance on your part lady!!