Miscellaneous: Today, I tried to vacuum to surprise my mom with a clean house....

By fire starter - 16/08/2015 04:10 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I tried to vacuum to surprise my mom with a clean house. The vacuum started shorting out, sparked, and then burst into flames mid living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 144

You deserved it 2 106

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Same thing different taste

That sucks

By Mike55 - 05/10/2023 21:30

Today, I set out to clean the house while my wife was at work. Starting with the vacuum cleaner, it suddenly started making a strange noise and emitting a burning smell. Panicking, I unplugged it and noticed one of our toddler's socks had been sucked into it, causing it to overheat. I managed to extract the sock, but now our expensive vacuum cleaner is toast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 193

Proper job

By So so close to clean - 08/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Warren

Today, with words of encouragement from my mom, I vacuumed my room. After finishing and admiring my job well done, I went to put the vacuum away. It caught on the plug for my electric razor which was dangling below the dresser and yanked that and everything else that was on top of it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 412

You deserved it 1 291

By blck - 01/01/2009 02:53 - United States

Today, my girlfriend tried to clean out the fireplace with a vacuum cleaner, she sucked up a bunch of embers which set the vacuum on fire. After a crying for a bit, she went back to finish cleaning up only to find that some embers she dumped in a bucket melted through and set part of the carpet on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 680

You deserved it 3 929

By ouch - 12/12/2009 20:36 - United States

Today, I finally finished vacuuming my downstairs. Instead of finding the wall outlet and unplugging the vacuum, I triumphantly tugged the cord from across the room to release the plug from the wall. It flew at me at top speed and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 944

You deserved it 41 955

Give me strength

By Michael - 05/02/2021 21:30 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, I wanted to clean my house. Of course the vacuum cleaner got stuck behind furniture multiple times. After the fifth time or so, I gave it a good pull. Now my vacuum cleaner is broken and the socket is off the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 325

You deserved it 1 002

That sucks

By Anonymous - 29/11/2018 15:30

Today, I bought a new vacuum cleaner after having to go several months without one. Immediately, I wanted to try it out. I must have underestimated how powerful it was, as it sucked up my socks and then broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 484

You deserved it 968

Toxic wasteland

By Cinderella - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, my house was so dusty that when I started to clean it, the smoke detector went off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 148

You deserved it 2 602

By Clutz - 25/10/2009 00:41 - United States

Today, after I had finished vacuuming, I ripped the cord out of the outlet and it hit me in the face cutting both my top and bottom lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 420

You deserved it 35 896

By baldspot - 02/04/2012 05:38 - Australia

Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 979

You deserved it 2 885

Shocking!

By Toasted - 29/04/2019 20:00

Today, in an attempt to be frugal, I tried to repair my own sometimes-faulty toaster. Turns out I unplugged the wrong kitchen appliance, which I only discovered by electrocuting myself while pulling it apart. Now it's definitely broken, will need replacing, and I have a burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 2 584

WitEluded 13

Sunday 16 August 2015 18:44

I think you will still succeed in surprising her...

Arathis 19

Sunday 16 August 2015 18:42

Cook some s'mores over the fire and surprise her with those.

Comments

dirtbikeguy 14

Wednesday 19 August 2015 5:11

Red Foreman: "dumbass"

mkayden 23

Wednesday 19 August 2015 14:49

'There's a fire starting in - ..well in the middle of the living room.' OP said to the 911 operator whilst amazingly impersonating Adele.

bambij 9

Thursday 20 August 2015 5:13

look at this way, she'll never ask you to vacuum again. XD

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 531

You deserved it 10 056

Today, after years of insomnia and going to doctors to help get a regular sleeping pattern, I finally fell asleep without the help of medication, only to dream about being chased by an angry seal and singing to Rihanna with a horse. This is probably why I don't sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 973

You deserved it 4 287

The Top

Today, I was bowling with a woman I like. At the end of the night, I was trying to decide whether I should ask her out. I went up to her and said, "It was fun bowling with you." She said, "Thank you, Patrick." My name isn't Patrick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 021

You deserved it 146

Today, a body positivity influencer I greatly respected and admired suddenly died. When I tried to read about her death, all I found were thousands of comments fat-shaming and mocking her. I was crying so hard that people thought I'd had a death in the family, which I kind of did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 320

You deserved it 707

Today, I learned the hard way not to keep my own cash in my pocket while working as a cashier, when I was forced to give $30 to a scamming customer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 450

You deserved it 2 882

Today, my new manager, who I have spent the last three months training, had a managers' meeting and now won't be returning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 328

You deserved it 66

Today, I got an A+ on a writing assignment. My teacher asked me three times if I really did write this article myself, and didn't memorise an article from the Internet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 507

You deserved it 127

Today, I found out my trousers have actually been slowing ripping on the side, after I'd been boasting to everyone I have lost weight and that, “My trousers are literally falling off me.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 675

You deserved it 394

Same thing different taste

That sucks

Proper job

Give me strength

That sucks

Toxic wasteland

Shocking!

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