Intimacy: Today, I was at the grocery store and this hot guy was staring...

By hard - 09/08/2010 07:07 - Canada

Today, I was at the grocery store and this hot guy was staring at my ass, so I smiled at him. My mother noticed he was checking my ass out, and she approached him and said "I know she has a big ass, but it's rude to stare, son." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 707

You deserved it 5 825

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Same thing different taste

By amore89 - 28/07/2019 12:00

Today, I was with my dad at the supermarket and this guy was checking me out. My dad yells at him with a grin, "I know! I make beautiful babies!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 882

You deserved it 243

By Anonymous - 16/08/2012 21:09 - United States

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 667

You deserved it 47 766

By oshitdonotwant - 08/08/2009 13:42 - United States

Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 508

You deserved it 4 074

Confused

By Anonymous - 13/06/2014 23:36 - United States - Rahway

Today, I was out shopping with my mom. While we were walking, a guy in a car honked at me. I'm not used to compliments, so I was pretty flattered and flashed him a smile. He looked back at me, confused, then shook his head and pointed at my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 564

You deserved it 6 014

By Anonymous - 31/12/2011 06:21 - United States

Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 864

You deserved it 7 313

By embarrassment - 12/06/2009 13:46 - Canada

Today, I went to a family dinner. While waiting to be seated, a guy walked by and I looked to see if he was hot. Then my grandma yelled, "Get your eyeballs back in your head and quit staring at boys!" The whole restaurant heard her. Including the guy. And yes, he was hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 400

You deserved it 8 386

By thathurt - 01/01/2012 00:51 - United States

Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 057

You deserved it 8 396

Miscommunication

By embarrassed - 21/07/2021 01:59 - United States

Today, I saw a really cute guy in the grocery store. We made eye contact a few times and I was trying to work up the nerve to start a conversation. Instead, he screamed, "Yes, I know I’m fat, bitch. You don’t have to stare!” I got so many dirty looks I left immediately. I didn’t think he was fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 474

You deserved it 134

Toxic much?

By tlm84 - 28/07/2014 02:54 - United States - Fitchburg

Today, while out shopping, I could hear what sounded like two grown men talking about me, and they were being pretty gross. I turned around to scold them and it turned out being a dad and his 13-year-old son. He said he was, "teaching a son to be a man", and that my ass was "grounds for discussion." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 650

You deserved it 5 064

By motherdearest - 21/03/2009 23:18 - United States

Today, I went to the mall with my mom. We were in American Eagle shopping for spring clothes, when a few good looking guys walked by and whistled at me. I smiled at them. They were checking out my mom, not me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 286

You deserved it 6 988

Timmo_fml 2

Monday 9 August 2010 16:16

#I like big butts and I cannot lie...#

The_Fonz_fml 0

Monday 9 August 2010 16:15

lol that's funny OP over protective mombot

Comments

number0 8

Monday 9 August 2010 17:19

YDI for going shopping YDI for having a mother YDI for flaunting your ass

ThinIce 0

Monday 9 August 2010 17:22

Lmao 9

monsterskatr 0

Monday 9 August 2010 17:25

haha wow that blows

CitizenSnipz 0

Monday 9 August 2010 17:30

As I read this, it had 1337 FYLs.

bh0p 0

Monday 9 August 2010 17:36

bigger is better

EastonxStealth 0

Monday 9 August 2010 17:44

I'd take small but peppy over big

selenagirl_fml 0

Monday 9 August 2010 17:51

YDI for having a mom. YDI for going to stores. YDI for buying stuff. YDI for noticing the hot guy. YDI for being stared at.

ZleveL 0

Monday 9 August 2010 17:51

54 you are uber arnt you

sataris20 5

Monday 9 August 2010 17:53

probably all the action she'll get with a mom like that

Wederoney 16

Monday 9 August 2010 17:55

Haha, your mum ruulez !!! Welcome to my favourites ^^.

Keywords

Facebook Sex Love Christmas Cheating Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Cute Am I overreacting? Holidays Cats Gifts Awkward Shopping Hair Health Friends Relatable Pregnancy Kids Poopoo peepee Education Money Gross Animals Intimacy Cops Neighbours Smells

The Top

Today, I went with my girlfriend to her parents' house. They told me I smelled of cheap vodka. When I told them I worked in a bio lab and used ethanol a lot, they said I was too stupid to do anything like that. My girlfriend broke up with me because her parents think I'm a drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 916

You deserved it 3 417

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 786

You deserved it 22 717

The Top

Today, our computer system has irretrievably broken down due to viruses. My boss is the one who refused to get new antivirus software, but he’s still blaming me because I’m the computer guy and should be able to protect us from stupidly complicated viruses, "like the hackers in the movies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 668

You deserved it 252

Today, I found out that Cheetos are flammable, as is my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 967

You deserved it 10 277

Today, my mother-in-law called me selfish, lazy and a bad mother for giving my kids chores, like picking up toys and shoes. When we got married, my husband didn’t even know how to load a dishwasher or run a load of laundry. According to her, a "real mother" waits on her family hand and foot. Yeah, OK. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 172

You deserved it 256

Today, I found out the reason my crush has been talking so openly to me. Not because she likes me back, but because she thinks I'm gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 170

You deserved it 2 649

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 496

You deserved it 320

Today, my dad started Skype-ing with his long-distance friend. They’re both almost 90, barely have their hearing, and can't stop shouting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 110

You deserved it 216

Same thing different taste

Confused

Miscommunication

Toxic much?

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