Transportation: Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall....

By babymine - 09/03/2012 04:45 - United States

Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall. In the spur of the moment I thrust my arm up to catch it. I didn't catch the bag, but I did catch her boob. I had to sit next to her for the rest of the flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 061

You deserved it 2 964

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Same thing different taste

By plantfood - 06/01/2012 05:47 - United States

Today, I was boarding a plane and an elderly woman asked if I could put her carry on into the overhead bin. Eager to help, I energetically lifted her bag up, and smacked her in the face with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 024

You deserved it 6 361

The strangeness of strangers

By wellalrightythen - 09/02/2015 06:23 - United States - Hobart

Today, I boarded a plane. A woman decided that she didn't like where she'd put her carry on luggage and pulled it out from over my head. The heavy luggage then fell right onto my face, the wheel smacking me in the mouth and busting my lip open. She just laughed and waltzed away without a word. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 928

You deserved it 2 506

Look where you're going, dude

By balancestrikesagain - 24/04/2009 09:37 - United States

Today, I was getting onto an airplane and happened to admire the stewardess. I was walking onto the plane and was just about to talk to her when my foot slipped into the crack between the boarding ramp and the plane. Not only did she laugh as I limped to my seat but now I have bruised nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 470

You deserved it 10 795

Hanging

By James - 31/07/2011 04:20 - United States

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 394

You deserved it 18 019

By PlaneGuy - 25/02/2017 01:00 - Reunion - Saint-denis

Today, I was on a plane and a cute girl was getting ready to sit down beside me, but upon making eye contact, she asked to switch seats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 212

You deserved it 741

By saltynutz20 - 07/04/2009 18:12 - United States

Today, I was on a flight from Chicago to Minneapolis. A rather attractive young lady sitting next to me fell asleep at the beginning of the flight. About 40 minutes into the flight I noticed my fly was open. The lady woke to me with my hands in my crotch struggling to zip up my fly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 721

You deserved it 8 047

By ifmlftw - 22/06/2011 04:03 - United States

Today, I was sitting next to a lady on an airplane who was very overweight. She fell asleep on me, and violently bled from her nose upon take off and landing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 104

You deserved it 3 060

By ctop - 13/05/2011 05:45 - United States

Today, I was sitting in the lecture hall. A girl walked by to get to her seat and her dress got caught on the handles, lifting it up. She didn't notice but I did, so I tried to take it off the handles. She turned around to see me holding her dress up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 452

You deserved it 8 437

Family jewels

By DanJames24 - 05/06/2020 14:00

Today, while on the bus, I had to stand as all the seats were taken. I was standing behind a group of small girls who were messing around with their bags. As they were swinging them, one hit me square in the nuts with her elbow. The girl said, “Wise up, I hardly touched you.” I missed my stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 726

You deserved it 186

By James4929 - 08/01/2010 00:25 - United Kingdom

Today, I was on a long-haul plane journey home from my holiday. After 5 hours, I decided to stretch my arms whilst watching a movie. Little did I know that a little girl was approaching, running down the aisle as my arm stretched out. I accidentally clothes-lined a little 9 year old girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 334

You deserved it 4 063

jammy_side_up 0

Friday 9 March 2012 8:48

if she drops her bag again.. you know why. lol

jtthegr8 26

Friday 9 March 2012 8:43

At least it wasn't a total loss...right?

Comments

ZodiacDesigns 0

Friday 9 March 2012 8:50

That's a win if you ask me, grabbed some girls boob. I don't see the FML there :)

xXxIracebethxXx 14

Friday 9 March 2012 9:15

*cough* Obvious virgin. *cough*

ShawnzieNstuff 6

Friday 9 March 2012 9:37

*Cough* Obvious *****. *cough*

zinoxity 23

Friday 9 March 2012 9:40

23 got defaced by 31. Lmao.

notsorandomguy 18

Friday 9 March 2012 9:02

Did she weigh 300 pounds and wink at you?

mcinnesandrew 6

Saturday 10 March 2012 0:57

That would be so hot if she was

AllSoul 23

Friday 9 March 2012 9:02

While reading this, I imagined this woman as an old lady. Very saggy. Very unattractive.

loserboii 11

Friday 9 March 2012 9:02

Don't lie you meant to grab her boob; we're onto you OP.

RodderstheLegend 5

Friday 9 March 2012 9:04

Doesn't matter. Got boob.

DKjazz 20

Friday 9 March 2012 11:26

Got milk?

KatelynBabyxo 3

Friday 9 March 2012 9:07

That's so awkward...

booozle93 0

Friday 9 March 2012 9:08

Did you get a quick BJ at least?

MargieDrury 1

Friday 9 March 2012 12:04

....... Ew?

smileypoop 2

Friday 9 March 2012 16:17

56- your face goes perfect with your comment. Haha

BrysGirl27 14

Friday 9 March 2012 9:18

Anyone else imagine an old lady with boobs sagging down to her knees? Lol:p

ankoku 2

Friday 9 March 2012 9:38

Don't worry ma'am I caught your DEAR GOD THAT'S NOT A BAG!!!

BrysGirl27 14

Friday 9 March 2012 9:52

Hahahaha excuse me ma'am you dropped your.....never mind..*walk away*

samsea 5

Friday 9 March 2012 9:22

Nothing better than a hand full of tit...(.)(.)

ShawnzieNstuff 6

Friday 9 March 2012 20:52

Sex is better than a hand full of tit.

efynsien 1

Friday 9 March 2012 21:35

Tuche...

elephantom12 9

Saturday 10 March 2012 1:29

Two handfuls of tit is.

turbodewsh 2

Friday 9 March 2012 9:43

Doesn't matter, grabbed chest!

Keywords

Money Health Kids Christmas You're fired Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Love Am I overreacting? Facebook Social Media AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Students Relatable Technology Education Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Argument Ironic Friends Awkward

The Top

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 079

You deserved it 410

Today, I asked my son to keep my new girlfriend secret from his mom until our divorce was final, and he ran straight to her. She told the judge I was unfaithful and wants more money from our settlement. My son doesn't give a shit about snitching on me, because she's giving him a percentage of the new settlement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 1 847

The Top

Today, while jogging in the park, a confused elderly gentleman asked me for directions, so I told him how to get to where he needed to go. He paused for a long moment, then asked me if he could eat me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 370

You deserved it 2 243

Today, my mom disowned me and forced me to move out because I didn’t have a crying heartbroken meltdown at the death of my stepfather. She knows I hated the man's guts since the first time he slapped her, so my not caring about his death shouldn't have surprised her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 283

You deserved it 83

Today, I moved back into my dorm. My ex-girlfriend, and the guy she left me for, now cohabit next door. Now I get to hear them screwing while I try to do my homework. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 110

You deserved it 4 333

Today, I spent a while in a tree after fleeing a rampaging Blue Tongue lizard, only to be chased back out of it by an angry possum. Australian wildlife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 241

You deserved it 1 004

Today, I was late to a sold out movie in the theater, so I had to shuffle in during the previews in the dark. I sat down in what I thought was the last vacant seat, but I'd really just sat in a small woman's lap. She was not happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 414

You deserved it 13 003

Today, I got a letter in the mail telling me to report for jury duty. The day that I have to show up is the day of my wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 299

You deserved it 2 809

Same thing different taste

The strangeness of strangers

Look where you're going, dude

Hanging

Family jewels

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