Health: Today, I was giving myself a breast exam for lumps. I heard laughing,...

By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 03:20 - United States

Today, I was giving myself a breast exam for lumps. I heard laughing, looked around and saw that the 12 year-old neighbor and his friends were watching through the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 042

You deserved it 12 509

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 08/05/2013 06:42 - United States

Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 040

You deserved it 5 543

But he's only 5

By Anonymous - 18/12/2019 05:00

Today, I was playing with my 5 year-old neighbor. I was changing and he saw me naked. Then he went home and his parents came over. Apparently, he told them that I have beautiful boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 770

You deserved it 733

By Matti - 17/08/2018 22:00

Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 194

You deserved it 241

By applegreen - 16/02/2017 15:00 - Ireland - Limerick

Today, while getting a breast exam for some suspicious lumps, I was lying on the table with my boobs exposed and I learned my doctor is afraid of wasps. I had to chase the wasp out whilst topless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 589

You deserved it 511

Paper-thin walls

By Lauren Davies - 17/09/2019 06:00

Today, I had to tell my 4 year-old, "I'm wiping my butt right now, I can't get you a drink. Please wait a minute." I distinctly heard my neighbor laughing through the bathroom window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 593

You deserved it 319

By noway - 22/03/2015 04:03 - United States - San Francisco

Today, a girl asked me to check out her left breast, which she said she'd found a strange lump on. I'm an orthodontist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 877

You deserved it 3 456

Health tip

By Anonymous - 12/10/2023 16:02 - United States - Laramie

Today, I was hanging with my mates when we found an old pregnancy test. Since I’m a guy, we thought it’d be hilarious if I took it. It came out positive, so we were roaring with laughter. That is, until someone looked up why. Turns out, I might have cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 857

You deserved it 124

By Anonymous - 29/04/2013 16:51 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 784

You deserved it 13 335

One a day, so they say

By jazzie7719 - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Arlington

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 397

You deserved it 4 432

By brittbrat4 - 13/08/2011 06:51 - United States

Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 310

You deserved it 36 643

sweet_candy_ 17

Wednesday 29 December 2010 9:00

close your blinds op.

schwancy 2

Wednesday 29 December 2010 9:02

Awkward... However, kudos for taking the time to self exam.

Comments

Hystical 0

Friday 31 December 2010 8:50

You might want to get those ******* checked out, one's bigger then the other :P

bibbzy 1

Friday 31 December 2010 19:31

i Woould have went out and beat them up, my mom has cancer and she found it herself so that deffinately isn't funny

AtrumMessor 1

Saturday 1 January 2011 3:32

YDI for giving yourself a breast exam with the shades wide open. Way to be discreet, hussy.

CiaraLovesYouu 0

Monday 10 January 2011 6:30

I love how youre touching your boobs right in front of a window. do it often?

insanelyXnikki 18

Saturday 12 March 2011 19:55

I would've pointed a shotgun at them just to watch them crap their pants lol

lolzkitty 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 20:03

go inbto the bathroom

snoopyF 9

Monday 22 August 2011 12:37

emm...theres these new things, just came out, called curtains...it may be a good idea to invest in a pair...

brycizzle 0

Tuesday 17 April 2012 7:31

I was one of them

daisiebud 18

Monday 7 May 2012 15:53

"today, i couldn't believe it when a preteen boy and his friends, upon noticing a woman playing with her boobs, decided to watch." seriously, now?

sweethang26 7

Sunday 18 November 2012 3:33

Close the window maybe? I don't know, just a thought...

Keywords

Kids Gifts Awkward Money Alcohol Love Health Addiction Work Sexism Coworkers Racism Sex Bodyshaming Annoying Parenting Accident Miscellaneous Intimacy Poopoo peepee Cute Weddings Sports AITA Erratas Ironic Neighbours Housework Home improvement Cleaning

The Top

Today, I was wearing a new $500 dress on a crowded train. I looked great and I could feel the eyes on me. A cute guy then offered me his seat, only boosting my confidence more until he said "for you and the baby," pointing at a bump in my dress. I'm not pregnant and wasted $500. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 935

You deserved it 28 850

Today, my husband and I were having sex in the shower while our 5-year old was sleeping. Apparently, she wasn't sleeping and she asked me what those loud noises were. I told her I was singing. Now I can't get her to stop "singing" in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 067

You deserved it 61 629

The Top

Today, I showed my mom a picture of a baby sloth. She then said, "Wait, sloths are real?" She thought Ice Age made them up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 370

You deserved it 3 737

Today, my girlfriend informed me that during the night, I shot up in bed and whimpered tearfully, "I don't have anything for the fancy-dress!" She also decided to share this with all our friends. I'm never going to live this down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 144

You deserved it 5 095

Today, we had a meeting at work, during which I got reprimanded for "disappearing." I'm the only one who constantly stays busy, since I'm broken in a way that my self-worth directly correlates with how productive I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 132

Today, my brother lost his first tooth, so I told him the tooth fairy is going to give him money. He now thinks The Rock is going to show up in his room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 874

You deserved it 7 015

Today, I figured out how serious my weight problem really is when my boyfriend had to lift a fat roll before he could enter me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 809

You deserved it 59 427

Today, my coworker was talking to me about how there's always that one person in a group of friends that everyone secretly dislikes and laughs at. I realized that that person is me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 586

You deserved it 177