Love: Today, I was hanging out with my crush and wanted to see what...

By Anonymous - 23/12/2010 04:35 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with my crush and wanted to see what he thought of me. Instead of asking him straight, I tugged at my shirt, saying ''I don't know why I wear this top. I always look awful in it." He said, "Are you fishing for a fat joke?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 624

You deserved it 45 516

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Same thing different taste

Awful line of inquiry

By teddyissmall - 14/04/2014 06:29 - Canada - Montréal

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 056

You deserved it 7 428

Our cross to bare

By sierra808 - 31/05/2009 09:43 - United States

Today, I was walking on the beach when I saw my crush walking towards me. I was thinking about what I was going to do while playing with my top that ties in the front. I decided that I was just going to smile. When we got closer to each other, I smiled and waved, and as I put my hand up it untied my top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 560

You deserved it 17 554

By awkword - 31/12/2013 17:47 - United States - Mckeesport

Today, I was dressing in front of my boyfriend. He was looking at me in wonder and I assumed this was a good thing. Then he muttered, "God damn, you're awkwardly shaped." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 028

You deserved it 3 873

By AnnaNick - 14/02/2010 02:19 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I were out shopping. As he was trying on shirts, I told him that the particular shirt he was wearing looked ugly. He turned around, sighed, and said "You think? Well, your face is ugly, but you don't see me complaining about it." He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 977

You deserved it 10 362

By rayraydayday - 21/03/2015 04:25 - United States - Englewood

Today, I was wearing a new tank top that was really cute. I later was talking to an attractive guy and thought he was giggling at me because he thought I was being cute and funny. I then realized he was giggling at the fact that I'd only shaved one armpit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 306

You deserved it 11 035

Mistaken identity

By Anonymous - 23/04/2022 12:00

Today, I asked my crush out for coffee but she wanted to go shopping. When she pulled me into the dressing room for my opinion on a bikini, I told her this was too fast for a first date. She looked at me in absolute horror. She thought I was gay, as in a harmless gay friend she could take shopping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 275

You deserved it 263

By embarassed - 12/10/2009 14:13 - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 497

You deserved it 6 823

By Anonymous - 23/03/2009 20:42 - United States

Today, I decided to play a joke on my boyfriend and planned to pretend that I found a thong in his gym bag. When he came home, I "confronted" him. After struggling through putting on my best face, he, unexpectedly confessed: "Look, babe, I'm sorry. It meant nothing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 520

You deserved it 94 559

By anonymous - 19/07/2012 22:31 - United States

Today, I was at work when a cute guy came up to me and said he liked my shirt. In a desperate attempt to say something back, I said, "Thanks, I like your shoelaces." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 955

You deserved it 6 789

By oops - 27/03/2014 23:10 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 139

You deserved it 7 129

tj265 0

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:02

gotta be straight up with guys we dont catch hints easy lol

you_freak 7

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:12

That is the worst bout of hinting I have ever heard! As for the guy ... WIN!

Comments

Amanda_Cait 0

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:07

well...were you fishing for one??

knoll4007 3

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:08

Prolly cause he's not straight, ... with you(;

SleazeDisease_fml 0

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:09

This would be your hint to seek someone cable of picking up on hints.

you_freak 7

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:12

That is the worst bout of hinting I have ever heard! As for the guy ... WIN!

Rocketgirl89 17

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:12

Ydi

lolwutdino 9

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:22

agreed. :|

Acousticpixie14 6

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:23

I hope you learned your lesson. You can't drop hints or fish for compliments with guys. Just go right out and say what you gotta say

adorkable_spazz 0

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:25

You should have just been blunt with him, sweetie. Most guys don't like when us girls do shit like that. Next time, just tell him. Okay? [:

omghellokitty90 0

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:26

I'd slap him and say no but you were fishing for a fist :D lolwat

patriotman 0

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:55

Agreed^

omghellokitty90 0

Thursday 23 December 2010 10:06

back hand face palm with the fist part of your hand =fist slap o.o

Pb25797051 0

Friday 24 December 2010 1:55

that's why you are single. you don't respect men..

addisonsmom 0

Thursday 23 December 2010 9:30

Sorry to hear that OP. Just forget the jerk, you'll find someone better anyways.

Pb25797051 0

Friday 24 December 2010 19:20

you are an idiot

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The Top

Today, I tried reaching out to a brand on Instagram, telling them I'm a rising influencer and would love a free sample of some of their products to review. They replied back with a laughing emoji and "You have 44 followers. Eat shit." Then they posted it on their story, with my name listed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82

You deserved it 1 322

Today, I demanded to know why my boyfriend takes so long in public toilets. He admitted his ex was such a nasty ho, she would drag him into public toilets whenever she wanted dick in public. So now every time he goes in one, he gets a boner and has to "get rid of it" before he can come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 137

You deserved it 350

The Top

Today, I vacuumed my car as I'm trying to sell it. After the interior was clean, I sprayed some air freshener. The chosen smell was "new car". I think they mislabeled it, as my car now smells like urinal cakes. I have two potential buyers coming tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 192

You deserved it 4 374

Today, as my wife loves games, she set me a series of clues leading to our date night, where she's waiting for me. WHY? She knows how bad a problem solver I am. By the time she realised I was going to be hopelessly late, and answered my 50 missed calls, I’d only solved the first 2 clues out of 18 total. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 055

You deserved it 223

Today, the guy I was seeing put candles all over his room to make things romantic. As we were getting it on, a plastic bag caught fire next to the bed. He had the brilliant idea to wave it around to put it out. Burning pieces of plastic landed on my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 383

You deserved it 3 340

Today, my parents came to visit me at the ranch I work at. They're scared to death of horses, but I was explaining how they are almost completely harmless. I was showing them how to work around the horse without getting kicked. As they relaxed, the horse kicked me. I now have a broken leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 454

You deserved it 57

Today, I found out that one of my workmates had passed away due to Covid-19. He was among five other workmates who were calling me a "pussy" for going back and forth to work in car, instead of public transport. These five guys were eventually infected by someone in the public transport. FML

I agree, your life sucks 989

You deserved it 177

Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend and tell him that the red bumps around my nipples was heat rash, rather than admit it was actually razor burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 263

You deserved it 9 599

Same thing different taste

Awful line of inquiry

Our cross to bare

Mistaken identity

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