Transportation: Today, I was hitting on a cute girl on the bus. It was going...

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By acnecream - 03/05/2013 13:23 - Finland - Kinnulanlahti

Today, I was hitting on a cute girl on the bus. It was going well, and she gave me her name to add on Facebook. Since I didn't have the app, I opened Safari on my phone. It opened to my video from Pornhub I watched yesterday and started playing, on full volume, through the entire bus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 311

You deserved it 73 846

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Same thing different taste

It was for research purposes

By Anonymous - 17/04/2022 14:00

Today, I was at work and was in a conversation with some colleagues. I go to check my phone and accidentally clicked on the Safari app. Safari still had PornHub pulled up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 259

You deserved it 1 408

By Anonymous - 14/06/2014 21:32 - United States - Grand Prairie

Today, I was using my phone while in a crowded waiting room, and I accidentally tapped on a YouTube video with the volume still at maximum. The first words everyone heard? "Fuck her right in the pussy!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 733

You deserved it 25 382

Busted

By Extended_desktop - 11/09/2011 17:53 - Poland

Today, I got bored and decided to visit a porn site. I typed in the address and hit enter. A split second later, I realized I wasn't typing into the browser address bar, but in a chat window on my other screen. I'd been chatting with a girl I wanted to get with at the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 570

You deserved it 66 004

Check your head

By Anonymous - 21/03/2020 21:00

Today, while watching a movie on my iPad, a really cute girl sat next to me. Suddenly, everyone on the bus started clapping. I started to clap very loudly as well, asking the girl why we were clapping. She gave me a strange look. I then realized the applause was coming from my headphones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 705

You deserved it 2 275

By Anonymous - 24/04/2009 20:21 - Canada

Today, I was getting ready for bed, when I decided to watch some porno on the computer. Suddenly someone from my messenger list says, "You might want to turn off the 'What You're Listening To' option if you're watching porn." I snapped and exited the porn. 63 people saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 633

You deserved it 77 901

Match over

By dontask - 22/12/2018 18:00

Today, I was stalking my Bumble match’s Instagram feed before I said hello. I went to tap for sound on a video of him getting his backside tattooed but accidentally double-tapped and liked the video. Sound turned on and I realized I liked a video of him farting. Couldn’t say hello after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 076

You deserved it 1 864

By Terminator101101 - 30/05/2013 23:06 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be funny to go to the Apple store and log me on to Facebook on every single computer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 909

You deserved it 9 159

By koanroak - 22/06/2015 03:08 - United States - Carrollton

Today, while taking a slow night at my waitressing job, I thought I heard the sound of crying coming from the kitchen. I rushed in, thinking something terrible had happened. Nope, the bus boy was just watching porn on his phone with no headphones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 735

You deserved it 2 373

Surprise !

By Shrekkk - 02/07/2019 06:14

Today, I accidentally connected my phone to my mum's headphones while watching porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 2 605

By Anonymous - 19/12/2011 20:31 - United States

Today, my girlfriend tried to cover my eyes while I was driving on the main street, all because she caught me looking at an ad featuring bikini-clad girls on the bus ahead of our car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 561

You deserved it 6 134

ananas99_fml 10

Friday 3 May 2013 19:33

How did she react?? lol

Setareh23 34

Friday 3 May 2013 19:36

Now if she still friends you on FaceBook, you know you've got a keeper. Would've loved to see everyone's faces, hehe.

Comments

niqniq935 5

Saturday 4 May 2013 8:58

That's why you set safari to private browsing

BrionyMareeeee 4

Saturday 4 May 2013 10:12

Ouch!

xgetxbentx 13

Saturday 4 May 2013 10:43

Ydi, always switch sites and erase history.

plagiarismo 16

Saturday 4 May 2013 11:22

Damn, dude. Just because there isn't someone constantly looking through your phone doesn't mean you shouldn't tidy up a bit when you're done.

CupOTea666 9

Saturday 4 May 2013 15:30

Hahahahaha the same thing happened to me but in class, everyone looked round and started laughing, no one mentions it tho

DLT_fml 20

Saturday 4 May 2013 17:34

And that's why you get the app, dumbass!

nh97103 9

Saturday 4 May 2013 19:37

Pretty sure this is fake. iphones do not have flash player.

Tim2415 16

Saturday 4 May 2013 21:40

Busted!!!!

TITUS92 8

Saturday 4 May 2013 21:56

Hahaha there is a lesson in this post.....somewhere....

yusaku02 20

Sunday 5 May 2013 0:06

YDI for using Safari

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Today, my boyfriend and I got busted by a cop for having sex in his car. When the cop sent us on our way, we went home and the garage was open, so we called the cops thinking someone was in the home. No one was in the house, and we got the same cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 146

You deserved it 9 380

Today, at my job as a cocktail server in a bar, a group of good looking ladies sat in my section. As I was finishing up with the table next to them I overheard one of them saying, "I hope we don't get that guy, I want a sexy waiter tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 806

You deserved it 3 085

The Top

Today, I'm still trying not to cry. Yesterday was by birthday. I got an email from my dad with three words, "Happy Birthday (nickname)". I got a Facebook post from my mother. No card. No phone call. No gift. I have become nothing more than a Facebook friend to my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 649

You deserved it 244

Today, my wife yelled at me to "just stick it up her ass already." No, not for anal sex, it was a suppository she got from the doctor. This is the closest I’ve been to sex in 2 years, since she decided we were done having sex and won’t even explain why when I ask. We’re only in our 30s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 168

You deserved it 190

Today, my husband thought it was the best idea ever to clean the cat's litter box with the brand new vacuum cleaner instead of tipping it into a bin bag. My house now fills with the smell of warm cat piss every time I hoover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 637

You deserved it 404

Today, out of the kindness of my heart, and so he wouldn't have to spend any money, I gave my ex-boyfriend my login information to my Vudu account. Big mistake. He logged me out of all devices, changed the password, and won't give me the new login information until I give him head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 255

You deserved it 767

Bro do you even lift?

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 195

Today, my cat brought yet another chipmunk into our house. She never kills them, so they stay in our house until we either capture them or they escape. So far, she's brought in three squirrels, four chipmunks, four mice, and a snake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 69