Health: Today, I was in the bathroom in a rush to get ready. Without...

By captfml - 15/12/2010 22:32 - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom in a rush to get ready. Without thinking, I put hand soap on my toothbrush. I didn't notice until it was already in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 311

You deserved it 27 716

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Ouch

By Anonymous - 31/07/2020 02:03

Today, while brushing my teeth half asleep, I stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush, toothpaste included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 568

By Anonymous - 29/10/2013 18:57 - Zimbabwe

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 850

You deserved it 13 884

By Mirroronthewall - 30/08/2009 15:22 - Canada

Today, I was brushing my teeth in my bathroom. As I looked in the mirror I spotted a zit on my forehead. Keeping my toothbrush in my mouth, I quickly lean in towards the mirror to pop the pimple meanwhile lodging my toothbrush down my throat. I temporarily can't talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 765

You deserved it 44 232

By Noname - 09/11/2008 09:18 - France

Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 689

You deserved it 13 854

Soapy

By Anonymous - 10/11/2022 00:00

Today, like every morning, I washed my mouthguard with bar soap. Tonight, though, I realized I hadn’t rinsed as well as I should have, there's soap between my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 261

You deserved it 689

Rushed

By K.Trinity - 15/06/2024 20:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was in a rush to get to work and decided to multitask by making my coffee while brushing my teeth. Halfway through, I absentmindedly poured mouthwash into my coffee mug and took a big gulp. I spent the rest of the morning trying to get the taste of minty coffee out of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 445

By idontlikebitter - 08/03/2016 21:10 - Switzerland - Klingnau

Today, as I was doing my make-up, I needed a Q-tip to fix a mistake. I took one out the box and put it in my mouth to get it wet. Too bad someone had used it before to clean their ears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 224

You deserved it 3 967

By Talented73 - 25/04/2017 20:00

Today, while brushing my teeth, I applied the toothpaste to my toothbrush when a few bristles got caught on the lip of the tube and flung a glob of toothpaste into my eye. My eye is now bloodshot, but at least it's minty fresh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 131

You deserved it 398

Once you pop…

By Anonymous - 11/06/2022 00:00

Today, while I was trying to put on my deodorant, the whole stick popped out when I took the cap off, narrowly missing my face, into the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 104

By soccercrazed1520 - 13/01/2010 21:40 - France

Today, I was taking a warm shower when someone in my house flushed the toilet, making the shower extremely hot. In my rush to get out so I wouldn't get burned, I slipped and knocked a tooth out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 302

You deserved it 4 390

DrAwesome 6

Thursday 16 December 2010 1:54

"I didn't notice until it was already in my mouth." Sounds like my ex-wife.

DocBastard 38

Thursday 16 December 2010 2:09

It's ok, I'm a doctor and I can help you. Go play leapfrog with a unicorn. It's the only cure. Sorry.

Comments

hwkman68 2

Thursday 16 December 2010 12:37

now that's funny right there. bet your ass pays attention in the future!

macskapingvin 0

Thursday 16 December 2010 13:59

Hey, at least you didn't pour bleach on your cereal. That was not a good day.

Ninjafriends 1

Thursday 16 December 2010 18:09

OP, did you put a bar of soap on your toothbrush and not notice it was soap? Stupid kid.

Calyx_fml 21

Thursday 16 December 2010 19:32

That will teach you not to swear.

HomeAl0ne 20

Thursday 16 December 2010 20:33

Come back when you've confused IcyHot/Dencorub/DeepHeat with your haemorrhoid cream, then we'll talk.

towboatdude 0

Thursday 16 December 2010 20:50

Ok Op you must be one serious idiot. Just explain how in the hell. You confuse a tube of tooth paste or in a pump. With soap in a pump. Because I've never seen soap come on a long slinder tube?