Animals: Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at...

By Anonymous - 11/06/2011 22:36 - United States

Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 264

You deserved it 7 318

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Same thing different taste

Rocky VIX

By Anonymous - 29/09/2019 20:06

Today, I was laying with my face dangling down the side of my bed, when my kitten rushed up to me looking worried. He sniffed me for a while, then decided the best thing to do was to stand on his hind legs and start punching my face like a speed bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 357

You deserved it 363

By ambushcat - 06/07/2012 03:31 - United States

Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 514

You deserved it 28 636

By meowmeow - 21/09/2010 04:38 - Australia

Today, I noticed my kitten was growling and twitching in his sleep. I tried to wake him up by gently prodding him. He responded by waking up and attacking my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 778

You deserved it 31 288

By scratchpost - 28/10/2010 12:07 - United States

Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 927

You deserved it 4 622

Say sorry to Mr Whiskers!

By Anonymous - 10/05/2021 14:01

Today, I awoke to my cat sitting on my chest. That wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't tried to get her off. She promptly went crazy and scratched me. My fiancée, who was sleeping next to me, hit me, called me cruel, and told me to apologize to the cat. I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 932

You deserved it 329

Jackson Galaxy moment

By Foreigner Fail - 25/09/2022 13:30

Today, I meowed at my cat and he got really close to me. I then meowed again and he punched me in the face. Them's fightin' words, it seems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 732

You deserved it 370

By Catremorse - 01/08/2019 14:00 - United States - Centreville

Today, my cat was laying on my chest while I was in bed. I farted, which my closed legs seemed to amplify. My cat was so scared, she used me as a launching pad and cut my chest in three places with her claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 370

You deserved it 575

By Michelle - 20/02/2011 17:45 - United States

Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 108

You deserved it 4 973

That's the power of love

By Sorry kitty - 15/10/2023 09:00 - United States

Today, I tried to pet my cat. By doing so, I accidentally shocked her with the static electricity in my fingers, and she slashed my face in retaliation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 613

You deserved it 179

Beware!

By Anonymous - 24/11/2011 17:07 - United States

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 116

You deserved it 3 832

xXshadowrollerXx 6

Sunday 12 June 2011 2:35

Your pussy is out of control.

flockz 19

Sunday 12 June 2011 2:47

sorry i hate beiing the grammar nazi but *onslaught

Comments

crushedone 7

Sunday 12 June 2011 4:39

It'll be ok. ******* are usually uncooperative at least once a month.

masterstangman 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 4:51

my cat sleeps at the end of my bed and starys bighting my feet at 7 every morning i fewl your pain a wenot

luvppl 6

Sunday 12 June 2011 4:51

Awwww, I send you my condolences... Your comments are always so sad... please cheer up!!!! :)

MaskedAspen 6

Sunday 12 June 2011 4:55

maybe he just hates you.

rhysfucker 24

Sunday 12 June 2011 4:57

just a little FYI, dogs view their owners as pack leaders, or alphas. cats view their owners as equals, even though we are typically 10 times their size. that's one of the reasons I have 2 dogs, no cats....my wife and I are the pack leaders, not some bitchy feline. get a dog, rat, or plant and u won't be dissapointed.

mft556 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 14:40

I agree my partner had a cat used to piss all over my stuff and poke it's ass at me all the time. then when I put it outside it brought a live snake into the house. partner said it was a gift and not to put her back outside!

sheethapins 13

Sunday 12 June 2011 5:00

Yes... yes... My feline brainwashing satellite is working perfectly. Soon all cats will randomly attack their owners, meanwhile I will take over the world! Victory is mine!